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Build Your Own ECG
Jason writes "I finally finished documenting my $4 home made electrocardiograph (heart monitor). If anyone is interested or wants to build one for themselves, please come by and take a look. Makes me wonder why medical care costs so much. :)"
...please come by and take a look.
Translation:
Please slashdot me and don't even peek... :-)
--
Error 500: Internal sig error
This could make a great gnome toolbar applet. Then I could enjoy watching my heart race when I accidently type 'rm -rf *' in the wrong directory!
when you can tell me how to build one of 'dem four dollar defibrillators. With my steady diet of coffee, butter and bacon, heck, that thing would pay for itself.
And to think that today I used $4 to buy two Nacho Cheese Steak Chalupas at Taco Bell. While you were out trying to save your heart, I was slowly beating it into submission with slightly substandard but confusingly delicious Fast Food(TM).
Small potatoes make the steak look bigger.
I finally finished documenting my $4 home made electrocardiograph (heart monitor).
From the website:
Here you will find information how how to build one with less than $10 in parts.
Lies damned lies!
Bored with karma, be a fan/freak
His vital are dropping, maybe he should have looked into monitoring his school's server.
- clear -
Beep beep...beep beep...beep beep
-Mr. Fusion
Making your own antibiotics really isn't that difficult... maybe I should write up a how-to and submit it.
Beep, Beep, Beep, Beep... Beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.......
0110100100100000011000010110110100100000011000100
---^v---^v---^v-------
Eeep...eep...eep..eeeeeeeeeeee
time of death 927PM CST.
Damnit jim I'm a doctor not a webserver admin..
Partnership for an idiot free America!
Umm, people pay for VB?
What are you going to tell me next, people buy Windows? ahahaha
Welcome to my web page on how to make a simple ECG (electrocardiograph - also known as an EKG). Here you will find information how how to build one with less than $10 in parts. But before we get started, let's take a moment to talk about shop safety. Be sure to read, understand, and follow all of the safety rules that come with your power tools. Knowing how ....ummmmm,
sorry. I guess I got into a little New
Yankee Workshop moment there. :) Anyways, I do want to talk
about safety. This device requires you to strap electrodes across your
chest. This is inherently dangerous.
Both because of the pain caused by sticky tape pulling hairs out of a person's
body and also because even
small currents can kill. Do not attempt this experiment if you are not
comfortable around electrical devices. I am not responsible for any harm
you may cause yourself. I have done everything I can think of to make this
safe, but don't come crying to me if you find yourself dead.
Now that I've started with this positive note, I can begin. I've split my web page into two sections. One for the impatient - who would like to make their own NOW. And the other for people who would like a little commentary from me. Oh, and those of you who just want to see the final product and don't care about the details, just skip to the Results. Happy reading!
Quick Details on building your own ECG
In Depth Information about my ECG
Introduction - What is an ECG? History behind it. What was I thinking?!
Some Stuff Sought Out - Miscellaneous things that I needed but didn't have
Adventures in Analog Land - The primary amplification circuit - all good ol' analog
Plenty of Programming - The visual basic source
Results - Maybe it's not perfect, but I think it's COOL!
Future thoughts - I still think I'm perfect, but I'm ready to argue these specifics
Notes - I didn't make this all up. Here's proof!
Not bad for about two weeks of work, eh? If any of you have any comments, questions, insults, etc; please email me. Thanks for coming.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
"First things first -- but not necessarily in that order"
-- The Doctor, "Doctor
That's the sound of yet another web server flatlining.
BTW the only lame thing around here is your bloody "lameness" filters! How in hell else can I simulate a flatline in text without using repetition?
You're using her as bait, Master!
How to build an ECG for $4:
parts list:
* one surplus patient cable with sensor and plug ($4 on ebay)
instructions:
* Plug the sensor into a strip chart recordor or heart monitor you might have lying around the house. For instance I found and old Hewlett-Packard model 78534C EKG and dual-channel pressure monitor.
You're done! It's THAT EASY! And just FOUR BUCKS!
Tune in next week when I tell you how to build your own x-ray machine for the cost of some X-ray film (you might need to find some medical equipment you might have laying around the house to complete the project).
From the article:
"but don't come crying to me if you find yourself dead."
You also see dead people?
Comment removed based on user account deletion
Finally a slashdot story that counteracts the slashdot effect. Of course the readers may be dead on the floor, but at least everyone will get to read the article...
I'm going to spring for the $30 ECG.
I learned my lesson with the $4 dentistry set, and even worse, the $4 electroshock therapy machine.
I STILL can't quite get my hair to stop standing on end. I can't even wear hats - hair pokes through like skewers through butter (which, incidentally, is one of the only things I can eat now thanks to the dentistry set).
I thank the lord I didn't invest in the $4 eye-surgery kit.
Mod me down and I will become more powerful than you can possibly imagine!
Speaking of medical safety...did anyone notice that this device is running under Windows? I don't know about you, but I'd never hook anything running Windows up to my body.
IAAL
Oh yeah! You're American! No free medicare for JOO!
...
Ok now, all together now:
Oh Canada!
But wait, I hear you say, nobody is anywhere near replacing programmers with software - but you think you are going to replace cardiologists?)
Yeah, first we'd have to program a computer to be arrogant and have a God complex...
Just because it CAN be done, doesn't mean it should!
If you try this at home, please document your efforts at this site.