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Mars Express launch today

Posted by Hemos on from the send-it-up-there dept.

mikerich writes "The European Space Agency and the Russian Space Agency will launch the Mars Express spaceprobe today using a Soyuz-Fregat out of Baikonur cosmodrome in Kazakhstan. Launch is scheduled for 17.45 UT (18.45 BST), so far all preparations have gone smoothly and the forecast is excellent. The launch will be streamed over the Web by ESA. Mars Express consists of two components, a large Martian orbiter which will be searching for sub-surface water and studying the Martian atmosphere. Its seven science packages have been built by teams from Europe, Russia, the United States, Japan, and China. Amongst the science packages is a radar for studying geological structures. Mars Express will map most of the planet in high-resolution colour stereoscopic 3D and perform a high-resolution mineralogical survey of the planet. Mars Express is also carrying the tiny Beagle 2 lander designed by a team led by Professor Colin Pillinger of the Open University. Beagle 2 is Britain's first planetary space probe and designed specifically to look for life using the most advanced techniques currently available. For those in the UK, the story of Beagle 2 is being told on BBC 2 on Monday 2nd June at 23:20." Dan B. writes "The BBC is running an article on the European 'Mars Express', Europe's first interplanetary rocket. This is the first of three probes heading to the Red Planet this Summer, as it nears it's closest point from the Earth in thousands of years."

20 of 183 comments (clear)

  1. Mars... by SpanishInquisition · · Score: 4, Funny

    That's so 1976...

    --
    Je t'aime Stéphanie
    1. Re:Mars... by Alan+Partridge · · Score: 3, Funny

      no, no

      it's at 17:45

      --
      That was classic intercourse!
  2. If anything goes wrong... by jabbadabbadoo · · Score: 4, Funny
    ...just call SOS Beagles

    Let's hope the ESA engineers haven't been barkin' up the wrong tree.

  3. The search by Timesprout · · Score: 5, Funny

    Beagle 2 is Britain's first planetary space probe and designed specifically to look for life using the most advanced techniques currently available.

    In the best British tradition the probe will lay out a tea set and some cucumber sandwiches to attract alien lifeforms.

    --
    Do not try to read the dupe, thats impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth
    What truth?
    There is no dupe
    1. Re:The search by AndrewHowe · · Score: 5, Funny

      Let's hope the aliens are not cucumber-like.

    2. Re:The search by mark2003 · · Score: 3, Funny

      In the best British tradition the probe will lay out a tea set and some cucumber sandwiches to attract alien lifeforms.

      Actually in the best British tradition, the probe will be wearing an England/Millwall/Arsenal shirt, will be p*ssed out of it's mind and will start broadcasting threatening messages to any lifeform it detects for "looking at it funny".

      We are not going to Mars just to find life but to kick the living daylights out of it...

    3. Re:The search by mark2003 · · Score: 2, Funny

      Would be more appropriate for it to be chanting either:

      Come and have a go if you think you're hard enough, or

      Engerlund, engerlund...

    4. Re:The search by sane? · · Score: 2, Funny
      Well...
      1. The colour test pattern of the Beagle 2 has been created by the artist Damien Hurst.
      2. Damien was one member of the joke band 'Fat Les', famous for their song 'Vindaloo'
      3. Said song was famous for doing very well on the terraces at a previous excusion of the England football team into foreign parts.
      So, not too far off the mark.

      Now all we need is a Mars excusion robot shaped like a ball, with appropriately shaped black solar cells positioned over its surface and, BINGO! - Mars football...

    5. Re:The search by Epsillon · · Score: 3, Funny

      In the best British tradition the probe will lay out a tea set and some cucumber sandwiches to attract alien lifeforms.

      No, with the thin Martian atmosphere the water would boil at too low a temperature, so you can't make a decent cup of tea on Mars. Frightfully important to make a good first impression on the blighters, so we sent it up with some of our real ale instead. Wouldn't want them to get ticked off for sending awful tasting stuff - like your beer - wot! :o)

      --
      Resistance is futile. Reactance buggers it up.
  4. We are getting so much closer now... by WwWonka · · Score: 3, Funny

    ...to hearing Tom Brokaw proudly state that "Nasa has just sent a probe to Uranus!"

  5. Obligatory Futurama joke by Mika_Lindman · · Score: 2, Funny

    ...to hearing Tom Brokaw proudly state that "Nasa has just sent a probe to Uranus!"

    Prior to this, the name Uranus will be changed to Urectum.

  6. Damn it.... by botzi · · Score: 4, Funny

    I was going to watch the launching from the ESA site....
    Now with the link to the streaming page published on /. I may simply forgot about it:-/

    --
    1. No sig. 2. ???? 3. Profit!!!
  7. But is the Beagle Horny? by krystal_blade · · Score: 3, Funny

    This is the first of three probes heading to the Red Planet this Summer, as it nears it's closest point from the Earth in thousands of years

    People of Earth, hear us. We, the people of mars, grow tired of your repetetive probings!

    You must cease and desist with this probing, especially with one named after a dog. (We've watched what your dogs do on your planet, and have no wish to undergo the same "leg" treatment.)

    And you must stop this photography of our martian mounds. This blatant harrassment will only lead to a hostile relationship between us.

    Perhaps with some beating, and bondage thrown in...

    krystal_blade... No martians were harmed during the posting of this comment....

    --
    It will be easy to motivate our fellow man; there is hardly anything people treasure more than not being annihilated.
  8. Re:watch the launch, live by dj_paulgibbs · · Score: 2, Funny

    bugger. Mod me down :(

  9. In 2003, War was beginning... by krystal_blade · · Score: 2, Funny

    Martian Overlord: What happen?
    Engineering Drone: Somebody set up us three probes.
    Signals Drone: We get signal.
    Martian Overlord: What!
    Signals Drone: Main screen turn on.
    Martian Overlord: It's You !!
    Beagle: How are you gentlemen !!
    Beagle: All your base are belong to us probes.
    Beagle: You are on the way to destruction.
    Martian Overlord: What you say !!
    Beagle: You have no chance to survive make your time.
    Beagle: HA HA HA HA .... Bzzzt Chirp!
    Martian Overlord: Take off every 'zig'!!
    Martian Overlord: You know what you doing.
    Martian Overlord: Move 'zig'.
    Martian Overlord: For great justice.

    krystal_blade

    --
    It will be easy to motivate our fellow man; there is hardly anything people treasure more than not being annihilated.
    1. Re:In 2003, War was beginning... by Tackhead · · Score: 2, Funny
      > Beagle: All your base are belong to us probes.
      > Beagle: You are on the way to destruction.

      As opposed to:

      Generic NASA Mars Lander: We are on the way to destruction.

  10. Re:Good luck Europe! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    We don't hate Americans, just the ppl who voted that )*()@(#$(@#*$ moron into the White House

  11. Re:Isn't it sad... by Vollernurd · · Score: 2, Funny

    Maybe, until they want independence. We'll end up levying taxes against them, they'll not like it, and before you know it "The Redccoats are coming!" :)

    --
    Smokey, this is not 'Nam, this is bowling. There are rules.
  12. I think there's something wrong with Mr. Poslow by DrMorpheus · · Score: 2, Funny
    but watch out for vacuum leeks
    I didn't know leeks could grow in a vacuum. Well those damn, clever Welsh!
    --
    Debunking the "59 Deceits"
  13. In other words by 2names · · Score: 3, Funny
    so far all preparations have gone smoothly and the forecast is excellent.

    Translation: "Our Secret Soviet Weather control machine is working perfectly. Now, where are Moose and Squirrel?"

    --
    "I'm just here to regulate funkiness."