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Star Wars Galaxies Reviewed
Tark writes "Want the inside scoop of what SWG is like? Well, Warthog has written a review for all of you, entitled 'Warrior, Brawler, Hairdresser' with his insights on the game. Sort of. Let's just say you won't find a review anything like this one anywhere else."
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Which sounds like a pretty fair summary of the SWG login process.
If you were blocking sigs, you wouldn't have to read this.
I wonder when this one becomes the next http://www.progressquest.com/ ?
Two birds with one stone! This is also a good review of Pear PHP framework.
How is this review so original? I've seen this before when viewing a link posted on Slashdot :)
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Text of article:
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And here I thought this article was going to be about the theoretical plausibility of the layout of the Star Wars universe...how silly of me.
-uso.
Dreams, dreams, don't doubt dreams, dreaming children's dreaming dreams. Sailor Moon SS
...as if a million incoming HTTP requests were suddently silenced.
"That's no moon... it's a slashdotting!"
Laugh at my Lisp and I keeell you.
This guy must be a Linux user...
Funny, I got "Could not connect to remote server." That is as accurate a review of SWG right now as one could write.
It's nothing but crumpled porno and Ayn Rand.
Want to build a giant white Wookie, and name him Abominable? Knock yourself out.
Are we trying to compensate for something here?
"Some fight for law. Some fight for justice. What will you fight for? One day, you will see."
"Keep your pants on, fellow game geek!"
Hey, not all geeks get their jollies off on Star Wars Galaxy. I heard that some geeks use porn.
--- I'm Green Hornet's sidekick not Inspector Clouseau's!
I can""t believe how accurate this review was of SOE""s new SWG game. I""ll be waiting for the content to improve before I""m going to buy it. If Kirsten Dunst naked is "mediocre". Then I would be satisfied with far less than I previously imagined...
Where can I verify this? Ever since Spiderman...mmmmm, Kirsten Dunst....
So you're saying IT'S A TRAP? :)
Seriously. This guy thinks that a 21 year old movie star is "mediocre," but gets a hard on over a dancing alien in an online version of the cantina scene? Dude, at least upgrade your fantasy life...
http://www.jeffjimmerson.com
Warthog has written a review for all of you ...
Warthog... don't you mean the 'puma'??
Sometimes the best solution to morale problems is just to fire all the unhappy people.
I''''m of the opinion that Warthog''''s review is more imaginative than anyone else''''s. However, he''''s in need of a good editor, or maybe just needing a keyboard where it''''s possible to clean the sticky punctuation keys.
Overall score for goodies: So far, I'd say the loot system in SWG is like seeing Kirsten Dunst naked: pretty mediocre. However, this is all pretty unconventional, and it may yet prove to be a decent system.
I would really like to see Kirsten Dunst naked. If the game is as good as that, I would buy it today.
No reason to lie.
There is some degree of irony in the fact that the review cannot be connected to over the internet.
Neither can the game.
Jeremy
I don't understand, where are the pictures? I was doing a goggle search for "Kirsten Dunst naked" and I get this?
Think of it this way:
I'm an average Joe. I am 31 years old and grew up enjoying Star Wars. I hear about the game, and decide to go get it. I load up the game, read the manual, and find out I can't get an X-Wing.
I just lost 80% of my interest in the game.
Now, when I go around and fight, I realize that the graphics are pretty, but there isn't much gameplay.
I decide it isn't worth the monthly charge, and cancel my subscription.
Now, take out the '30 year old growing up on star wars', and you have everquest.
The game is about going around, enhancing your levels/skills, the end. Yeah, I can nitpick and find differences, too, but the game still only appeals to MMORPG types like everquest lovers.
That (along with the lack of space) is why I said it is nothing more than EQ with a SW theme.
I just want to play a SW MMOG that isn't a fp based, planet based, character interaction game. I wanted a space-sim, work on space based skills (like scounting, and lasers, engineering, and piloting, and mining, and capitalship systems), and join in massive wars, like the battle of endor. Not some, "I'm an ewok, would you like me to dance for you in exchange for a haircut and axe" game.
Good quote, too many chars. Seriously, the slashdot 120 char limit sucks!
"I found myself lusting after an in-game avatar" I sadly miss the days of game journalism written by adults.
It's not stupid. It's advanced.
I'm one of the biggest fans of MMORPGS...
But the funnest thing I did in galaxies was create a:
Fat man with a mullet
Strip him to his wife beater and skivvies
Teach him dancing
Take him to the cantina
And give everyone who came in lapdances and grinds
"Its my fueltank for love."
"I'm dead sexy."
"Buisness in the front, party in the back"
And random in your face comebacks.
God spoke to me
Imperial Star Destroyers are closing in on the Millenium Falcon. We join our heroes as the hyperdrive has once again failed.
Leia: Well, flyboy?
Han: It's not my fault!
Chewie: Neuuurgl
C-3PO: Sirs! R2 says that there is a malfunction in the alluvial dampers and... oh dear...
Han: Spit it out, goldenrod.
C-3PO: And... the telephone is... unsanitary.
Chewie: Rrroaaargh!
C-3PO: We're doomed!
f4t_c0k69: I SATNIZE FHONE! I MASTR PHONE SANTISER!!!!!!!!
Leia: Uh... hello. OK. Can you, uh, sanitize our phone?
f4t_c0k69: 2 WOMPRAT SKINZ!!! TR4DE 4 2 WOMRAT SKINZ!!!!
Han: What the...? Chewie, do we have any womp rat skins?
Chewie: Nuhhhrr!
f4t_c0k69: U GAYS = TEH LAMERZ!!!! N E 1 WANTTRADE 4 WAMPRAT SKINZ??!!!
Han: Chewie? What's that pus in your ear? Did you use an unsanitized phone? Chewie, old buddy, what's wrong? Speak to me!
Chewie: ASL? ASL? ASL? ASL?
f4t_c0k69: 15/m/NY!!
Chewie: NO WAY, I = 15/m/NY 2!!!
f4t_c0k69: NO WAY!!!!
Chewie: NO WAY!!!!
Han: Right, that's it, I'm aiming for that Star Destroyer.
C-3PO: Sir, the odds of surviving a frontal assault on an Imperial Star Destroyer are...
Han: I'm not planning to survive.
Leia: Um, you do realize we're just sitting in a bar and pretending to be in a spaceship? They haven't been implemented yet.
Han: Who wants to play UT2003?
C-3PO: Yeah, this place blows.
My childhood dreams are about to come true! Oh, how I have waited.
If you were blocking sigs, you wouldn't have to read this.
But come on! You get to pay more money for those features! It's fun! See! Spending money is fun! Especially if you get to go to work to get money to get a game where you have to go to work in the gameto get money in the game to buy stuff in the game!
Can you tell that mmorpg's don't capture my attention too much?
Why yes, I AM a rocket scientist!
The bots in coop do that too. You step out of your jeep for five seconds to take in the scenery, and the second you turn back, two bots have leapt out of the bushes and are motoring away in a cloud of dust, hollering and yahooing at the top of their lungs.
*shakes his fist*
One god, one market, one truth, one consumer.