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Mitch Bainwol To Succeed Hilary Rosen As RIAA Head

bmarklein writes "The RIAA has announced that it has named Mitch Bainwol, former chief of staff to U.S. Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist, as chairman & CEO. He replaces Hilary Rosen, who left earlier this month. This confirms the speculation that the RIAA would appoint a well-connected Republican (Rosen was a Democrat)." Several readers have submitted links to CNET's coverage as well. Update: 07/29 12:30 GMT by J : Lobbyists wield incredible power nowadays, and Slate's report on why was enlightening. Here's part 1 and part 2. Includes lyrics to the rap recorded for Rosen's going-away party by some of the most powerful people in the world: "Who wants the job of Hilary Rosen? / How 'bout the dream team of Bono and Tauzin?"

31 of 480 comments (clear)

  1. Hey by Surak · · Score: 5, Funny

    U.S. Senate Majority Leader Bill Frist

    Is this a Frist Psot?

  2. Political wars by BWJones · · Score: 4, Funny

    This confirms the speculation that the RIAA would appoint a well-connected Republican (Rosen was a Democrat)."

    Well, I suppose from this wording there will not be any political flame wars generated from this.... :-)

    --
    Visit Jonesblog and say hello.
  3. Tattoo by Ryan+Stortz · · Score: 4, Funny

    Damn, now I need to get that "Death to Hillary" tattoo removed.

    --
    Bugs are just features that have been fixed.
    1. Re:Tattoo by greysky · · Score: 5, Funny

      You'd probably be best to keep it for when "the other Hillary" runs for the White House in 2008.

    2. Re:Tattoo by Oz_mjk · · Score: 2, Funny

      What if Hillary wins? I for one welcome our new robot master... oh wait what the fuck am I saying?? I say viva le death to hillary

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      ---
  4. So... by zifty · · Score: 5, Funny
    We're replacing a liberal die-hard conservative with a republican die-hard conservative to head a company whose conservatism rivals Dubbya's lack of intelligence.

    I think I'll have a good cry.

  5. Wait a second... by jeffkjo1 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Bainwol said in a statement. "What could be more rewarding than helping to promote two great American traditions: music and property rights?"

    Damnit... And all along I thought it was baseball and barbeques.

    1. Re:Wait a second... by commodoresloat · · Score: 3, Funny
      And all along I thought it was baseball and barbeques.

      You misspelled "beer."

  6. Re:protecting property by fidget42 · · Score: 5, Funny

    /me sits back and waits for people to start making fun of his name.....

    You mean simething like: "Can you imagine a Bainwol cluster of these?"

    --
    The dogcow says "Moof!"
  7. Email? by wmspringer · · Score: 2, Funny

    So, is everyone going to email him and congratulate him on his new job? I'm sure he'd love to hear what slashdotters think he should do first..

  8. Time to flee to Canada? by HermanAB · · Score: 4, Funny

    Well, in the time honoured tradition, repressed citizens of the freedom loving USA, can still flee to Canada. Maybe, just maybe, claiming persecution by the evil RIAA, will get you refugee status.

    If anything, it will probably get the Vietnam vets and slave traders to spin in their graves at 45rpm...

    --
    Oh well, what the hell...
    1. Re:Time to flee to Canada? by Txiasaeia · · Score: 2, Funny
      ... repressed citizens of the freedom loving USA, can still flee to Canada. Maybe, just maybe, claiming persecution by the evil RIAA, will get you refugee status...

      Forget that. I think we're going to go with the time honoured American tradition of overreacting and turn you guys away at the border.

      HOWEVER, if you come bearing A&W Sparkling Vanilla Cream Soda, I will greet you at the border myself.

      --
      Condemnant quod non intellegunt.
  9. More rewarding.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny
    What could be more rewarding than helping to promote two great American traditions: music and property rights?" Bainwol said in a statement.

    What would be more rewarding that promoting music and property rights? Hmmmm tough one there.

    How about the immense joy, convenience and satisfaction associated with obtaining music online? Heck, how about masturbation for that matter.

  10. Armageddon by arvindn · · Score: 3, Funny

    I can't help getting the feeling that as the inevitable ganging together of the forces of evil accelerates, armageddon can't be far off.

  11. Republican in the RIAA? by teamhasnoi · · Score: 4, Funny

    Thank God I'm not sharing Midnight Oil or I could end up being 'liberated' in the head.

    *knock, knock*

    Hold on a sec....

    Hey! What the..?! *PFhhT*

    *thunk*

    I FULLY SUPPORRT OUR NEW REPUBLIC KAN OVERLOARDS!!

  12. Re:will you people calm down... by Alien+Being · · Score: 5, Funny

    Didn't he try to buy uranium from Nigeria?

  13. Re:Former? by Waffle+Iron · · Score: 4, Funny
    Why did Bainwol get fired from / leave his previous position?

    He was just carried along by the angular momentum of the congressional/lobbyist revolving door.

  14. Re:Riiiiight... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    is you kidding?

    property rights almost DEFINE America!

    But of course I wonder what the hell does that have to do with Copyrights and music.. copyright takes the concept of property right and flips it upside down.

    I can just imagine if the RIAA was around in the early days of America:

    RIAA exec: Hi there Farmer Joe, I'd like to talk to you about potential copyright infringements, specifically your Friday-night get-togethers where you sing unlicensed performances of Little Brown Jug.

    Farmer: Git off mah property, monkey-suit boy! I bought that there sheet music fair an' square!

    RIAA exec: I'm sorry, but I'm afraid you only purchased the rights to perform it in the presence of yourself and one optional family member. Inviting the neighborhood over to "sing along" constitutes an infringment of the our rights.

    Farmer: What the hell are you talkin' about! I BOUGHT that there sheet music, that there sheet music is mine, same as the door you're a-standin' in, and the gun I'm a-gettin right now to blast a hole in your flabby gut.

    RIAA exec: Now now Farmer Joe, that's not how copyrights work, the rights to perform the song still belong to us. Now, we can settle this matter if you pay us $15,000, and we promise not to take away your house.

    Farmer: You're an ijit. *BLAM* *BLAM*

  15. In other news . . . by vegetablespork · · Score: 2, Funny

    . . . rumors from unnamed sources on the Hill are that the only MP3 file that will be able to be shared within the U.S. and its possesions without fear of prosecution by the Department of Homeland Security will be Horst Wessel Lied.

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    Call (206) 338-5780 COLLECT for information about a genuine BA, BS, MA, MS, MBA, or Ph.D.

  16. Re:will you people calm down... by ramzak2k · · Score: 5, Funny

    He hasn't even DONE anything yet.

    And we are just practicing.

    --

    Siggy Say, Siggy Do
  17. Re:More info needed. by snooo53 · · Score: 2, Funny

    Hey now! at least give the guy a day to prove he's right in line with the rest of the recording industry.

    Ya never know, maybe being a conservative republican (and therefore presumably a good businessman) he will figure the P/E ratio of litigation and public intimidation isn't nearly as high as say, lowering the prices of CDs and driving up sales which is ultimately what I think this debate all comes down to.

    Then again maybe I will magically get enough money for that Z5 convertible I've been wanting the last few years. I'm telling you, $6 DRM-free CDs... people will buy them buy them by the truckload, p2p networks or not. Maybe by some small chance he'll figure it out.... don't hold your breath though.

    --
    The sending of this message pretty much inconveniences everyone involved.
  18. Sing along with Mitch! by teamhasnoi · · Score: 3, Funny
    Mitch promises to bring a revival to the music industry.

    "Gone are the days when Auto-Tune carried a song! I will bring back talent to the Industry!", Mitch crowed at a Republican fund raiser, to the applause of many rich, white fat men.

    "It's high time the kids of today learned what music should sound like! I remember when talent drove the market, not the other way around! When I ascend to the throne, I will bring talent! I will bring value! I will bring CDs unencumbered with copy protection, and chock full of value!" Mitch puctuated these remarks with a pounding fist and spittle.

    Mitch finished his speech to the attendees with a rousing cry, "The RIAA will no longer be the 'bad guy'! We will sponsor new artists and stick with them, developing careers and encouraging creativity! We will offer all signed artists with new contracts, spelling out exactly what they will make - no hidden accounting!"

    "We will no longer chase file-sharers, who only do us a favor by expanding both our horizons with music, and purchase more CDs than ever before! We will never allow another American Idol or Making of the Band or manufactured marketing-friendly boy band again! All copyrights will revert to the original artist!"

    "I will personally include a puppy with every single sold! *HAHAHAAHAHA.cough cough..oh shit, I thought I could keep a straight face! Pass the bong guys, *wheeeezee* this is going to be great! I can't wait to absolutely wreck music forever! These shits are gonna be scared to look at a guitar, much less pick one up when we get done with them..I am gonna be SHITTTIIING moooonnnneeey, muthafuc...*hack* Oh, Bushies here!!! WHoooHOOO! Let's DO SOME LINES!!! Where's the White Lady??HAHAHAhaha..."

    This re-enactment is for entertainment only. It is not intended to portray Republicans as evil, rich, fat white, self-serving drug monkeys. Nor did Mitch ever say any of these things in front of me. Thank you, and please drink republicanly. ;)

  19. Re:Now that they've got a Republican in the post.. by Lost+Penguin · · Score: 1, Funny

    MP3's are easier to find than WMD's

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    I am the unwilling control for my Origin.
  20. Yes because darnit by phorm · · Score: 2, Funny

    Nobody copies our country music and gets away with it (even if they don't get caught, they suffer)!!!

    Are you sure that the CRIA can do anything about this, they may only have authorization over matters of Canadian artists.

  21. A new head for the RIAA? by phorm · · Score: 5, Funny

    Interesting... I've always assumed that the RIAA wasn't lead by a head, so much as a collection of asses...

  22. Re:Influence abounds... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny


    "Pre-paid senators..."

    I think sentators should be freely downloadable.

  23. Re:Riiiiight... by Monkelectric · · Score: 2, Funny
    property rights almost DEFINE America!

    Tell that to the indians ... or I will, when I'm done gambling

    --

    Religion is a gateway psychosis. -- Dave Foley

  24. Truth in Sentencing by heretic108 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Parking in a 'No Parking' zone:
    - $40-$200 fine

    Petty Theft:
    - $200 fine to 90 days' jail

    Aggravated Assault:
    - 90 days to 5 years' jail

    3rd Degree Murder:
    - 3 to 10 years' jail

    2nd Degree Murder:
    - 8 to 20 years' jail

    Associating With A Person Who Is Known To Have Had KaZaa Installed On Their Hard Disk:
    - 25 to life!

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    -- In the beginning was the WORD, and the WORD was UNSIGNED, and the main(){} was without form and void...
  25. Re:Former? by darnok · · Score: 2, Funny

    "I'll just confirm that with Chief of Staff BAINWOL"

    "Look out, here comes BAINWOL"

    I'll hazard a guess that having all your underlings laugh whenever they hear your name would tend to undermine your authority somewhat...

    Is this a real name, or something made up? He's not so much an enigma as an abbreviation:
    Bastards
    Allied
    In
    Neutering
    Wo rd
    Of
    Law

  26. Mitch Bainwol anagrams by Alien+Being · · Score: 4, Funny

    limit bach now
    omni law bitch
    wino itch balm
    blow manic hit
    him can blow it
    i bowl in match
    nail mob witch
    mail bitch now
    howl at ibm inc
    i watch no limb
    climb a hit now
    octal whim bin
    hint i blow mca

  27. Re:Explain for the rest of the world... by Gordonjcp · · Score: 2, Funny
    Erm, what? Your political system allows you to choose between right-wing and right-wing?


    Just stay where you are, we'll send some people over to assassinate your political leaders and "liberate" you, just as soon as we get them back from Iraq. We'll phone you when it's done.