Slashdot Mirror
Insurance Claims to be Tested by Lie Detector
Albanach writes "HBOS, one of the largest UK banks is to introduce random lie detector analysis of insurance claims according to this article from the Edinburgh Evening News. The three month trial will see calls from its 1.5 million policy holders randomly subjected to voice stress analysis. Those flagged up will then receive a set of questions designed to expose 'potential fraudsters'."
Why not just get Uri Geller in to sense whether they're telling the truth? Time and again lie detectors have proved to be - at best - slightly better than waving chickens when it comes to accuracy. Yet all Liberty can say is "I'm not persuaded this works".
Using voice stress analysis techniques to detect changes in speech patterns caused by stress, the machines will be able to make an initial assessment as to whether the caller may be lying.
A special series of questions has also been devised to try and catch out fraudsters.
And when was the accident?
Who was driving?
What's the capitol of Uzbekistan?
Pi to 15 digits?
I'm sorry sir, your claim has been denied.
Slashdot Syndrome: the sudden, extreme urge to correct someone in order to validate one's self.
And how do we know this story is true?
:P
Give the reporter a polygraph.
Mod Karma -1: I sed bad wurds. If I cep my mouf shut, I wud be at riyses.
The three month trial will also see their customer base dwindle to miniscule numbers.
Medtronic, a make of medical devices, announces that voice box orders in their United Kingdom division have increased ten-fold from the third quarter of the previous year.
"We have no idea how this happened, but we're happy to provide our technology to whoever needs it."
This space for rent.
"Thank you for calling HBOS Insurance. Your voice my be monitored to detect tiny fluctuations that may possibly indicate fraudulent statements. This technology is very controversial and invasive, but will allow us to prosecute one additional insurance fraud case each year. Rest assured, the money saved by fraud prevention will not be handed on to you the customer. Please hold for the next available underpaid outsourcer with no job security to copy all of your credit statistics into our closed-source database running the most up-to-date NT service pack from 1999."
"Isn't this an illegal detainment/unjust search?"
More relevantly, it's about as accurate as examining a bird's contrails to see if you're lying.
Scientific, my ass.
This is just another roadblock that insurance companies will put in front of customers to discourage them from making legitimate claims. The more roadblocks they set up, the more people won't make claims, the more money they make. What I have to do right now to make a simple medical claim is completely ridiculous. I have to fill in a paper form with loads of redundant information such as my address (that isn't on file?!?) and mail it to the company at my cost. It takes 3 or 4 days to get to the company and then they "process" it for another 2 weeks. Why isn't this electronic? Simple. If it were electronic, more people would make claims.
I always save my last mod point to mod up a good troll. You people are too serious.
Moe: No
Lie Detector: BZZZT!
Moe: All right, I did. But I didn't shoot him.
Lie Detector: Ding!
Detective: Checks out. All right, sir. You're free to go.
Moe: Good, because I have a hot date tonight.
Lie Detector: BZZZZZT!!!!
Moe: A date
Lie Detector: BZZZZZT!!!!
Moe: Dinner with friends.
Lie Detector: BZZZZZT!!!!
Moe: Dinner Alone.
Lie Detector: BZZZZZT!!!!
Moe: Watching TV
Lie Detector: BZZZZZT!!!!
Moe: All right! I'm going to sit at home and ogle the ladies in the Victoria's Secret catalog.
Lie Detector: BZZZZZT!!!!
Moe: Sears Catalogue.
Lie Detector: Ding!
Moe: Now will you unhook me already? I don't deserve this shabby treatment!
Lie Detector: BZZZZZT!!!!
FBI agent Scully : This is just a simple lie-detector test. I'll ask some simple questions and you should answer with yes or no. Do you understand?
Homer : Yes.
[ The machine blows up ].
Head of the Dorks
Maybe they would be stressed at living in a fascist country that forces them to take lie detector tests for everything.
Not to mention stress induced by the 'Press 1 to speak to a human being who sounds like a machine, Press 2 to speak to a machine who sounds like a human being ... [BLIP]
You pressed 1. Press 1 to speak to a person in Edinburgh, Press 2 to speak to a person in Bangalore, Press 3 ... [BLIP]
You pressed 2. If you want to learn more about our low, low rates Press 1, If you want a cuddly toy as seen in our adverts Press 2, If you actually want to talk to someone Press 3 ... [BLIP]
You pressed 3. Are you sure you want to speak to someone? Press 1 ... [BLIP]
whirr clickity
Hello and welcome to the queue to join the queue to talk to one of our service representatives, you are number [pause] fifty-seven in the queue, estimated wait time is [long pause] - do you have any plans for October? While you are waiting, do you know about our other services?' rigamarole.
Best wishes,
Mike.
Aren't these kinda days the ones that make people go psychotic and commit mass violent crimes and then shoot themselves at the end?
I hope they use bombs instead. Bigger insurance claims.
Im a pathological lier. Polygraphs dont work on us anyway.
All Troll + "offtopic" mods are meta moderated as "Unfair", because you abused the system.
I've studied atmospheric phenomena for many years and I have yet to see bird contrails.
Perhaps the word you are looking for is this.
Although, I admit that bird contrails would be an interesting sight. =)
He added that it could also lead to lower premiums.
BZZZZZZZT! LIE DETECTED.
What I want to see is lie detector tests for lying insurance agents. :) Probably going to happen about when that law which dictates the flogging of spammers followed by their head being placed on a pike as a warning to others is finally passed...
...make the companies themselves sit the tests when you pay your premium. "Now, you are going to pay up if I have an accident, aren't you?" I bet none of the cheating fuckers gets past it.
a Voight-Kampf test?
"Teachers leave us kids alone