Linus to SCO: 'Please Grow Up'

SCO's rebuttal by Anonymous Coward · 2003-09-11 03:02 · Score: 5, Funny

Linus to SCO: "Please Grow Up"

SCO to Linus: "My OS can beat up your OS. Nyah nyah nyah!"

Re:SCO's rebuttal by The+Analog+Kid · 2003-09-11 03:07 · Score: 2, Funny

Linus to SCO: "Please Grow Up"

SCO to Linus: "My OS can beat up your OS. Nyah nyah nyah!"

Linus to SCO(Rebuttle): Oh yeah, well your a poopy-pants.

SCO to Linus: Oh yeah, well I'm telling your mommy.
Re:SCO's rebuttal by pope1 · 2003-09-11 03:07 · Score: 4, Funny

Darl Retorts:

My Code is Rubber, your Code is Glue,
Whatever I Code bounces off me and sticks with you until you pay me my f@!#ing $699 you Finnish Son of a @$#@$!

--
/* * pope1 */
Re:SCO's rebuttal by QEDog · 2003-09-11 03:19 · Score: 3, Funny

SCO: Mommy! IBM stole my candy!
Mom: But the candy jar is for everyone everyone... they didn't steal your candy, the candy jar is to share candy. We love to share in this family, don't we?
SCO: But I want it ALL!
SCO Lawyers: They have to pay us $700 for each candy they took. And, we declarer sharing candy in the form of public candy jars illegal!

--
"There is no teacher but the enemy."-Mazer Rackham

oh this is funny by phunhippy · 2003-09-11 03:03 · Score: 5, Funny

All of our source code is out in the open, and we welcome you point to any particular piece you might disagree with.

Until then, please accept our gratitude for your submission

Haha.. thanks LINUS!! now i got dr. pepper all over my purty flat screen!!!!

Lottery by lord_paladine · 2003-09-11 03:03 · Score: 3, Funny

From the article: "... and now seems to play the U.S. legal system like a lottery."

SCO scratch off tickets? Now there's an idea!

Only a matter of time....... by bishopi · 2003-09-11 03:05 · Score: 4, Funny

......until this is all over, and just desserts are dished up......

Post-trial Justice

Ian

If we had openings, we wouldn't hire you by mpsmps · 2003-09-11 03:06 · Score: 5, Funny

chrisd notes that his company is making SCO employees unhireable.

I'd complain about how immature the policy is except that if you read the page, you see that they are not hiring, so SCO employees are ineligible for all zero of the openings they have available.

Linus!!! by Spackler · 2003-09-11 03:06 · Score: 3, Funny

Dear Linus,

You were a hero of mine, until this letter. Now, you are a SuperHero! The SuperBestFriends had an opening, but I would say it is now taken.

-Spack

Re:Childish screening procedures. by whee · 2003-09-11 03:06 · Score: 4, Funny

Damage Studios is a San Francisco based Equal Opportunity Employer.

Doesn't sound that equal to me. I don't know if I'd want to work for a company (Damage Studios) that acted in this manner, anyway.

Snowball's Chance in Hell by Dissenter · 2003-09-11 03:10 · Score: 4, Funny

and now seems to play the U.S. legal system like a lottery
Not quite my friend. Somehow I think my Mega Millions ticket has a better chance of winning that SCO getting anything from the community.

--

Dissenter
"There is no knowledge that is not power."

Darl to Linux by Mr.+Darl+McBride · 2003-09-11 03:10 · Score: 5, Funny

Darl here.

Alright, Linus. The gloves are off.

We'll now show the most damning evidence yet. There we have it, we've presented the basis for not hundreds, not thousands, not tens of thousands, but hundreds of thousands of derivative code in the Linux kernel.

Let's see you dig yourself out of this one, wunderkind.

Hiring ban by AveryT · 2003-09-11 03:12 · Score: 3, Funny

chrisd notes that his company is making SCO employees unhireable.

So they're refusing to consider SCO employees for any of the open positions that they .. oh, they don't actually have any open positions right now.

Wow, that'll teach them a lesson.

Today's top story by Otter · 2003-09-11 03:13 · Score: 5, Funny

...but we wait with bated breath for when you will actually care to inform us about what you are blathering about.

The real shocker here, of course, is that a Linux advocate spelled "bated breath" correctly for the first time in recorded history.

--
What I'm listening to now on Pandora...

Re:Today's top story by tommck · 2003-09-11 05:21 · Score: 2, Funny

He's a foreigner to us Americans, so he obviously knows the language better than we do!

--
---- It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again. It does this whenever it's told.

Linus seems.. by Ruie · 2003-09-11 03:15 · Score: 2, Funny

.. to have been reading a lot of Nigerian spam lately.

Take that! by Alizarin+Erythrosin · 2003-09-11 03:15 · Score: 3, Funny

To paraphrase Kelso from That 70's Show:

"BUUUUUURRRRRRRNNN!"

Sorry, I just got caught up in the wicked burn. Linus is awesome, what can I say? He certainly has a way with words. I laughed so hard after reading that.

--
There are only 10 kinds of people in this world... those who understand binary and those who don't

Torvalds to McBride: "No Soup for You..." by Vexler · 2003-09-11 03:25 · Score: 3, Funny

"...forever!!!"

It's all a Microsoft driven plot... by BeemerBoy · 2003-09-11 03:34 · Score: 4, Funny

Bill Gates is tired of being the most despised human being in IT, so he put up Darl as the new "Whipping Boy." It seems to be working! :-P

--
Buzzing the information Superhighway at Warp speed

Re:Childish screening procedures. by DataPath · 2003-09-11 03:35 · Score: 3, Funny

Well, to use SCO-ish tactics, and breed panic and doubt at SCO, you get a large number of companies to offer a grace period where ex-SCO employees may be hirable at normal salaries, and after that they suffer a $600 a year pay cut per linux license on your premisis.

--
Inconceivable!

Re:Hiring Policy by niko9 · 2003-09-11 03:35 · Score: 4, Funny

SCO isn't Nazi Germany, people!

"Springtime for SCO"
from Mel Brooks' The Thieving Whore Bastards CEO's

SCO was having trouble, what a sad, sad story
Needed a new leader to restore its former glory
Where oh where was he? Where could that man be?
We looked around, and then we found, the man for you and me,
And now it's ...

Springtime for McBride and SCO,
Utah is happy and gay.
We're marching to a faster pace,
Look out, here comes that smug Mcbride face.

Springtime for McBride and Utah,
Winter for Linus and Eric S Raymond.
Springtime for McBride and Utah,
Come on, Utah, go into your dance ...

I was born in Salt Lake City, and that is why they call me P Diddy.
Don't be stupid, be a smarty, come and join the SCO party.

Springtime for McBride and Utah
(SCO Unix box beeps twice)
Goose-step's the new step today
(SCO Unix box gun fires)
NDA's falling from the skies again,
(NDA's falls and explodes)
Utah is on the rise again

Springtime for McBride and SCO
System V are sailing once more
[woman's voice]: "Well! Talk about bad source!"
Springtime for Mcbride and SCO
Means ... that ... soon we'll be going ...
We've got to be going ...
You know we'll be going to ... Court!

Why is it... by Channard · 2003-09-11 03:38 · Score: 3, Funny

.. I'm getting flashbacks to the 'engineers on the Death Star being innocents' bit of Clerks?

Re:I'd rather die hungry and die honest by MojoMonkey · 2003-09-11 03:42 · Score: 0, Funny

Let me light a candle for you. *whimper cry sob* Give me a break.

--

----- "Blame the guy who doesn't speak English." -- Homer J. Simpson

Re:Childish screening procedures. by gbjbaanb · 2003-09-11 03:46 · Score: 4, Funny

Surely SCO v Linux equates to religion :)

Monty Python and the Holy Grail by Bob(TM) · 2003-09-11 03:47 · Score: 2, Funny

I can't help but be reminded of a similar exchange in a cinematic venue:

Darl: Halt! Hallo! Hallo!

Linus: 'Allo! Who is zis?

Darl: It is Darl McBride, CEO of SCO, and this is the Unix copyright. Who's source is this?

Linux: This is the Linux - it's open source.

Darl: Go and tell your users that we have be charged by our board of directors with a sacred quest. If you will admit you have violated our copyright, you can pay money for a license to use the infringing software.

Linux: Um, I'll ask them, but I don't think they'll be very keen ... Uh, they've already got a license, you see?

Darl: What?

Chris Sontag: He says he's already go one!

Darl: Are you sure they've got one?

Linus: Oh, yes - the GNU public license - it's very nice.

Darl: Well, um, we know you copied our code, so you need to purchase a license. Will you buy one?

Linus: Of course not! You are corporate types with no proof!

...

Darl: Now look here, my good man!

Linus: I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty headed animal food trough water! I fart in your general direction! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelt of elderberries!

Chris Sontag: Is there someone else up there we could talk to?

Linus: No, now go away or I shall taunt you a second time-a!

--

The little guy just ain't getting it, is he?

Godwin's Law by Isochrome · 2003-09-11 03:47 · Score: 2, Funny

Now that Godwin's law has killed this thread, can we PLEASE go back to RIAA?

And when do we get to start bashing Microsoft again?

Re:Childish screening procedures. by GR|MLOCK · 2003-09-11 03:48 · Score: 2, Funny

Discrimination usually means things you can't help, too. Nobody is forcing anybody to work at SCO.

And here I thought SCO was trying to force the entire Linux kernel development community to work for SCO, and for $0 salary to boot!

Re:Childish screening procedures. by Cpt_Kirks · 2003-09-11 03:56 · Score: 2, Funny

American lawyer-think

Like lawyers from other countries are any different.

You have to remember, lawyers are a lower lifeform, parasitic in nature. They are drawn to ambulances, disasters, and any other form of suffering like their cousins, the sharks, to blood.

They will not only bite the hand that feeds them, they will take the arm and part of the shoulder.

SCO Employees: Good for us! by Anonymous Coward · 2003-09-11 04:08 · Score: 1, Funny

Each time SCO issues a paycheck, they have less money for lawyers.

I say support SCO employees! They all deserve huge raises!

Re:Childish screening procedures. by cdrudge · 2003-09-11 04:08 · Score: 4, Funny

Or maybe working for SCO is a disability?

Re:Linus Flame by Mr+Coffee+Cup · 2003-09-11 04:21 · Score: 5, Funny

Makes me think of this 'classic flame' I acquired years ago (at least 8), and occasionally consult.. don't remember exactly where I ran across it, but it still ranks as about the funniest flame I've ever seen.

Because, among the people who read this newsgroup, you are granted the same respect as would be granted, say, your average root fungus. Not only are your language skills highly suspect, not only do you refuse to answer the most basic of questions about your qualifications and/or background, not only are you posting from AOL, you are annoying, your information is often wrong or unsubstantiated, and you have this air of blithe idiocy that makes people with more than eight operating neurons want to put you in a small envelope and mail you back and forth between people in Washington, D.C. until the Post Office finally sticks you in some pile of undelivered mail, where you would then remain until the weight of accumulating mail compresses you into a small lump of peat, at which point you would be ground into mulch and spread over someone's garden, thus gaining in death what you failed to obtain in life; a useful purpose on this planet.

Have a nice day. :)

Now thats a long copyright by Garion911 · 2003-09-11 04:47 · Score: 5, Funny

--
Slashdot is like Playboy: I read it for the articles

Re:Now thats a long copyright by shish · 2003-09-11 05:20 · Score: 3, Funny

That's because the game's set to be ready in "exactly 400 years". from now. or now. I forget which :(

--
I mod down anyone who says "I will be modded down for this", regardless of the rest of their comment
Re:Now thats a long copyright by Cnik70 · 2003-09-11 05:32 · Score: 4, Funny

Damn, by 2403 we won't even have to worry about the whole SCO/Linux thing. Mainly since RMS should just about be finished with HURD by then :)

--
-Cnik
Re:Now thats a long copyright by Anonymous Coward · 2003-09-11 05:51 · Score: 1, Funny

That's because the game's set to be ready in "exactly 400 years". from now

They're writing Duke Nukem Forever??

go linus! by MoFoQ · 2003-09-11 05:06 · Score: 2, Funny

MoFoQ engraves "Linus Rules" in his pitchfork and flaming torch

Anonymous Coward to chrisd: 'Please Grow Up' by Anonymous Coward · 2003-09-11 05:18 · Score: 1, Funny

Anonymous Coward notes that he should probably create an account to be taken more seriously, and wants to know if chrisd wants a cookie.

love it by Anonymous Coward · 2003-09-11 05:44 · Score: 1, Funny

if the code in the kernel is anything like Linus' letter, I think I'll start reading the kernel.

Nice going, Linus - treat them for what they are. (whatever that might be)

SCO Deathstar by aynrandfan · 2003-09-11 05:50 · Score: 1, Funny

*Begin ominous music . . . *

McBride: Good evening gentlemen. It appears that your pieces of your planet's core have belong to us. We demand complete control of your planet or else we will destroy you.

Linus: Where is your proof!

McBride: *Hands over bag of rocks and an arrowhead* Here 'ya go. Now hand it over!

--

----

"Ours was a free culture. It is becoming much less so."-Lawrence Lessig

SCO in Vegas... by shish · 2003-09-11 05:55 · Score: 3, Funny

"... and now seems to play the U.S. legal system like a lottery."

SCO's forum 2003 took place in vegas...

--
I mod down anyone who says "I will be modded down for this", regardless of the rest of their comment

Re:It's precisely the opposite of this attitude by milkman_matt · 2003-09-11 06:42 · Score: 2, Funny

Okay, let us play this game then.

Tell us for whom you work.

I am sure that I can find something that your employer did that someone, somewhere, will feel just as strongly as you. They believe with all their hearts that you should take a stand and quit your job.

Let us see if you will do it.

I bet you can't! Because I work for the U.S. Govt! HAH!

-matt

Plan to end all our woes by WebMasterJoe · 2003-09-11 07:55 · Score: 3, Funny

Here's my plan:

Write a song about Linux, and include some source code in the lyrics.
Build up enough interest in it so that some record label offers a deal. Major labels only, please.
Play the hell out of the song. Get all of Slashdot to buy multiple copies, get it preinstalled on Linux distros, etc.
Profit!!! (but we're not done yet)
Tell SCO that the second verse contains System V code.

Things will just, well, work themselves out. On there own. Easy.

--
I really hate signatures, but go to my website.

Re:My letter to Damage Studios by Cid+Highwind · 2003-09-11 09:08 · Score: 5, Funny

Ah yes, the dreaded "one slashdot member boycott". That's the tactic that brought Microsoft, the RIAA and the MPAA to their knees, ended the SCO lawsuit and the war in Iraq, made Blizzard stop abusing the DMCA, freed Dmitry, and got Half-Life 2 ported to linux! Fear the wrath of the slashdot! I think I can hear Damage Studios trembling in terror already.

--
0 1 - just my two bits

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Linus to SCO: 'Please Grow Up'

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