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Worst Jobs In Science
FortKnox writes "Popular science has the worst jobs in science. Some are silly, some are sick, some make you angry, and some just flat-out suck." And some of them sound fun :)
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Here's the printable page.
Hee hee, barnyard masturbator...
We recently had heard in the office over one of the Yellow Machine that's made by Anthology Solutions.
It's no longer slashdotted, but here's the complete list. 1. Flatus Odor Judge (smelling real fart samples) 2. Dysentery Stool-Sample Analyzer (studying diarrhea) 3. Barnyard Masturbator (go figure) 4. Brazil Mosquito Researcher 5. Hot-Zone Superintendent (ebola and anthrax outbreaks) 6. Isolation Chamber Tester 7. Fistula Feeder (why not call him a feces specialist?) 8. Prison Rape Researcher 9. Carcass Cleaner 10. Postdoc (anything you do after getting a PHD) 11. Metric System Advocate 12. Corpse-Flower Grower (it's a stench, not a smell) 13. Endanged Species Ecologist 14. Astronaut 15. Fish Counter 16. US Stem Cell Researcher 17. Planetary Protection Officer (prevents microbes from travelling from Earth to the solar system) 18. Fusion Researcher
One of the more serious issues about prison rape is the racial component. Prison gangs are almost entirely racial--usually Black or Hispanic. They do not protect their own from each other a great deal, but they do protect fellow gang members from outsiders. This leaves the White and Asian jail populations who tend to be less likely to form gangs at the highest risk of being targeted for rape.
It is very hard to find any serious discussion of this side of the problem--not to mention any discussion of the problem at all. Jared Taylor is one of the few writers courageous enough to detail the racial side to prison rape: http://www.amren.com/hardtime.htm
I would rather pick a writer more mainstream than Jared Taylor to quote on this issue. Taylor is an advocate of a white ethnic consciousness to be modeled after the ethnic consciousnesses of other minorities. He feels that this is an important counterbalance to maintain equal rights in our democratic political system. That makes Jared Taylor a racist in a lot of people's books. On the other hand, he is the only writer I know of who writes about this sort of thing, so I think it is important to at least give him a chance to say his peace. And, distressingly to me, his proposal of racial separation at prisons is probably a good idea. Prisoners are not, and will never beb tolerant members of our society. Even if we can eliminate racism from our communities, we will never be able to do so from our prisons. And the prison environment is certainly not the kind to foster increased understanding of other races. As a protective matter for all prisoners, Taylor may be right.
While your points are correct, I find that many (including myself) really enjoyed their postdoc experiences. It is alot like graduate school without the deadlines. It is up to you to succeed. There is no pressure, at least in my experience, generally my only drive to get up in the morning is imposed by me. BTW - I think it is clear that this was written by someone bitter about being a postdoc, because the other items on the list are (mostly) bogus.
-Sean
During my first year in college, I had the dubious honor of working as a home health-care aid for a quadriplegic man. As part of my job, every morning I was required to slip on a single Latex glove. I'd then insert my right index finger into the rectum of the man I worked for.
Why was this necessary you ask? He needed to take a dump.
With no control over any body function below the shoulders my 'stimulation' was the only way he could defecate. I'd swirl my finger around and around until my employer would reward me with a lovely brown turd. Imagine doing that for a living.
As a dirt-poor student, I held that job for eight months as I worked my way through college. But wait, it gets better. What was the final indignity you wonder? I made minimum wage at the time:
$3.35 an hour.
Mohd. Binatang bin Goncang
This story is a fake. The name translates literally to: Mohammed Animal son of Masturbate.
Friedrich Miescher, extracting DNA from pus-soaked surgical bandages in 1868.
Australian Researcher Barry Marshall, drinking Helicobacter Pylori infected gastric fluids from an ulcer patient to prove the hypothesis that said bacterium was the source of stomach ulcers instead of stress.
Those are two researchers that got famous for what they were doing, countless others remain unsung hereoes that have not made their way into the books of science history.
"There are already a million monkeys on a million typewriters, and Usenet is NOTHING like Shakespeare." - Blair Houghton
Anyway, we already have such a device. Here in Minnesota, it's called "outside". But our thermostat isn't very well regulated, and the regulator we do have is tied to a 24 hour cycle, causing the temperatures to swing wildly. Carcasses eventually spoil under these conditions.
There are no government-meat-locker-vans, standing by the woods just waiting to take away the freshly decapitated heads of deer. The DNR doesn't have walk-in freezers available to hold the thousands of heads they need to autopsy. And even if they thought about it in these times of budget crises, why would they? Onerous refrigeration requirements, outlandish electrical bills, all just to make my friend's job a little less disgusting?
John
6. Slashdot Meta-Moderator
[ridicule icon] [futility icon]
Your fantasies contain the seeds of important concepts.
You now have not only a semen sample, you've got the happiest male mouse in the lab and, if you're sick enough, the grossest palm-sized squirt gun in history.
You're welcome.
*** *** You're just jealous 'cause the voices talk to me... ***