Slashdot Mirror
'Matrix Revolutions' Opens Today
shelleymonster writes "The Matrix Revolutions was released worldwide at 9 AM EST today. With a running time of 2 hr. 9 min., I'm expecting the /. reviews to start pouring in around 11:30. Since critics are saying things like, "Matrix finale could put you back in a coma," and, "The final episode is a slam-bang, dreary mess," I'm curious to hear some real fans' reactions." Many readers have pointed to the BBC's review; they were not amused. Were you? Update: 11/05 17:17 GMT by T : Read on for one reader's (spoiler-free) first impression.
wickedweasel writes "Just came from one of the first showings of Matrix: Revolutions (Germany, don't know why, but it started 2:30 pm here) and came by to drop some comments (no spoilers). To cut it short: not even close to the first one, and honestly spoken way worse than the second one (which wasn't _that_ bad). The ones looking for cool action will hardly find any, neither will the ones who came for the story (like me) be satisfied. Only a few good scenes in and around Zion, some quite big plot holes and unfinished threads and, most important, an unsatisfying end, to say the least. I guess I'll be flamed for my opinion by the die-hard-fans, but hear this: I once considered myself one too until I saw this."
I live in Bangkok, and make about half a million a year in the Asian movie business here. I do what is called procurement. That job entails procuring 'Stars' for all types of movies. This story is about Jennifer, a little girl from the USA, who lived in a small town in the mid- west somewhere.
I got a call early Friday morning from Chin, my best client. He needed a Caucasian pre-teen girl for a big snuff film that he'd been contracted to shoot. He offered me the usual 100 grand to procure such a person. So I took off by noon, that very day, heading for Chicago.
Being the professional that I am, I quickly staked out a likely neighborhood, and found my target. She was a little girl around 8 or 9, with the right look for the film project. I knew Chin wanted a typical American look, blonde hair, blue eyes, very cute, that type of child. This little girl fit the bill to a tee.
I nabbed her with a tranquilizer dart in the neck, when she was on her way to the grocery store. In no time we were on the chartered jet that I had waiting at O'Hare, and quickly heading east-ward. It took about 30 hours to get the child back to Bangkok, keeping her drugged for the whole trip. I always keep my merchandise quite, you never know what will happen if they have mobility.
Chin paid me my fee upon arrival, and offered me another 20 grand, to act as her handler, which I gratefully accepted. This happened only when he had multiple projects going, so I considered myself lucky to pull in some more cash. Being the kids handler meant that I had to keep her until they needed her on the set. Considering the type of movie this was going to be, I didn't have to worry about her seeing me, so I just took her home with me.
The child woke up finally about 10 in the morning. She came out of the drugged state slowly, then looked around the room and asked, "Where am I, I want my mom, please let me go to my mom."
I said, "Baby, you'll have to wait to see your parents until the movie is over. You're gonna be in a movie, and you'll be a movie star, maybe your folks will get to see you on the screen." She just sat there looking at me, blinking. She was a real attractive little girl, I kinda thought this whole thing that was gonna happen to her was a real waist. But then the money was real good. Oh well.
We talked for a while, her hunger finally overpowered her fear, and she started to ask for food. I had found out that her name was Jennifer, and that she was 9 years old, and apparently at the top of her class in most subjects. She liked to talk a lot, I figured that was probably because she was nervous.
Well we lived together for the next 2 days, and I was becoming real fond of little Jennifer, her bright little personality, and her cute little ways. I think if I had a kid, I'd want her to be just like Jenny. Then I got the call from Chin, to bring little Jenny down to the set. I hated doing it, but I'd already been paid a 120 grand, and if I caused any trouble at this point, I'd be REMOVED permanently, and I couldn't see that would help anybody.
So I gathered up Jenny an we drove into the rural rice farm country, down back roads, to the studio. Chin had a little town sized facility built in the jungle, with high security fences and all the bells and whistles. After gaining entrance through the front gate, I delivered little Jenny to Chin and his director.
Jennifer wanted to know when she could go home, and with a very innocent voice said, "Mr. Chin, Rob told me that I could go home as soon as this movie is over. Will you let me go, if I do everything you want me to?" Chin looked at the young girl and smiled, "Yes child, you may go when we are through with you." This seemed to satisfy little Jenny, and she smiled back at Chin and followed the make-up man to the dressing room.
I just had to say it, "Hey Chin, this little girl is really cute, I think you ought to consider using her in a series instead of just one flick. I mean it, you oughta talk to her, I think she's a natural."
I'm very excited to go see this movie and plan on going this weekend. Also, related to The Matrix, a friend told me today about a website called The Meatrix. It's a Flash movie that aims to reveal the truth behind factory farming and where most of our meat and other animal products come from. Very interesting.
we'll see your hobbyist 'hackers' fraudulent ?pr? ?firm? witch hunt, & raise you a billyonerrors ransom of greed/fear/ego based felonious fauxking payper liesense stock markup FraUD execrable.
welcome to the gnu millennium.
Except that was a later edit. When the original screened back in '77, that "Episode IV" wasn't there.
Yes, I watched it in 1977. Yes, I'm old. No, I'm not so old that I'm losing my memory.
Eloi, Eloi, lema sabachtani?
www.fogbound.net
>Except that was a later edit. When the original screened back in '77, that "Episode IV" wasn't there.
Right. Now, laugh with me.
Marxist evolution is just N generations away!
I watched it back then as well, and I distinctly remember the "Episode IV" in the beginning.
I also remember my 10-year old brain at the time generating one parity error after another trying to figure out how I could have possibly missed the three previous films to this one very cool movie - and why the heck could I not find a trace of them nor heard a peep about them previously from my Star Wars fanboy friends.
I tried every decent and legal way I could think of to resolve the issue w/the business before I rented the chicken suit
Sick of gentoo zealots throwing plugs in completely unrelated topics? Me too!
Yes, but have you seen the system requirements for the Matrix?
Quod scripsi, scripsi.
OMG OMG OMG! J00 have Unlocked teh J3d1 in Star Wars Galaxies!!1!!
Howard Dean, M.D. for President in '04
If he is an M.D., then his motivation for socialized healthcare is to further the entrenched elitism of the doctor cartel who manipulate the supply of qualified healthcare professionals and help keep prices artificially high. He would also be in a position to help craft loopholes in new legislation to further the greed of pharmaceutical and medical devices companies and the abilities of doctors and insurance companies to avoid all liability.
Healthcare article at Kuro5hin
Is your neighbor named Ian? And does he invite you to play Neptune king of the sea in his bathtub like Arnold's friend with the bike shop owner on a very special different strokes episode?
So what are you saying? The Dean isn't any different than GWB?
On the other hand, that is a bitch of a question to answer.
Anything you might ever need to say about anything has already been said better by Penny Arcade.