Slashdot Mirror
"Nigerian" Spammer Arrested
Roger_Wilco writes "According to The Globe and Mail, a "Nigerian" spammer has been
charged with with first-degree attempted larceny. Hopefully we'll get a few less of that spam now."
← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)
Only 1,000,000 more to go!
Shame, really. I was looking forward to a long, hard talk about things with him...
Carousel is a lie!
That guy owes me $US45,000,000!
aw, sheesh... now how am I gonna pay my SCO licence?
I am a leaf on the wind
-T
i am dr zanzibar of the country canada. i would like to introduce you TO A limited time opportunity to become arrested quick. please send five hundred thousand (500,000) of these e-mails to various people around the world so that they will give you money. you will promise to give them many millions of dollars (>$1,000,000) this plan works real good.
PLEASE IF YOU ARE INTERESTED REPLY BACK TO MY ACCOUNT WITH YOUR PHONE NUMBER AND BANK PIN NUMBER. DO NOT WORRY I ALREADY HAVE YOUR BANK CARD AND AM WAITING TO COMPLETE THE DEAL. I RESPECT YOU AND REALLY LIKE YOU. I HOPE YOU WILL JOIN THIS AMAZING OPPORTUNITY.
DR. ZANZIBAR, CONCERNED AND ECCENTRIC PERSON.
Condemnant quod non intellegunt.
The more you tighten your grip, Tarkin, the more spammers will slip through your fingers.
This was the guy who was going to give me millions. I should have known he wasn't a genuine Nigerian when I read his email:
HON. RAYMOND ETIEBET(DR).
ATTN: Bobdotorg,
DEAR SIR
REQUEST FOR URGENT BUSINESS RELATIONSHIP EH
FIRST, I MUST SOLICIT YOUR CONFIDENCE IN THIS TRANSACTION. THIS IS VIRTURE OF IT'S NATURE AS BEING UTTERLY CONFIDENTIAL AND TOP SECRET EH.
WE ARE TOP OFFICIALS OF THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT OF NIGERIA CONTRACT REVIEW PANEL WHO ARE INTERESTED IN IMPORTATION OF GOODS INTO OUR COUNTRY AND INVESTING IN EUROPE WITH FUNDS WHICH ARE PRESENTLY TRAPPED IN NIGERIA EH.
IN ORDER TO COMMENCE THIS BUSINESS WE SOLICIT YOUR ASSISTANTANCE, KNOWLEDGE AND EXPERTISE TO ENABLE US RECIEVE THE SAID TRAPPED FUNDS ABROAD, FOR THE SUBSEQUENT PURCHASE AND INVENTORY OF THE GOODS TO BE IMPORTED AND THE INVESTMENT IN EUROPE EH.
THE SOURCE OF THIS FUND IS AS FOLLOWS: DURING THE PREVIOUS MILITARY REGIMES IN OUR COUNTRY, GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS SET UP COMPANIES AND AWARDED THEMSELVES CONTRACTS WHICH WERE GROSSLY OVER-INVOICED IN VARIOUS MINISTRIES. THE NEW CIVILIAN GOVERNMENT NOW SETUP A CONTRACT REVIEW PANEL WHICH I AND MY COLLEAGUES ARE MEMBERS AND WE HAVE IDENTIFIED A LOT OF INFLATED SUM, DUE TO OUR POSITION AS CIVIL SERVANTS AND MEMBERS OF THIS PANEL, WE CANNOT AQUIRE THIS MONEY IN OUR NAMES EH. I HAVE THEREFORE, BEEN DELEGATED AS A MATTER OF TRUST BY MY COLLEAGUES OF THE PANEL TO LOOK FOR AN OVERSEA PATNER INTO WHOSE ACCOUNT THE SUM OF US$31,000 000,00 (THIRTY-ONE MILLION UNITED STATES DOLLARS) WILL BE PAID BY TELEGRAPHIC TRANSFER. HENCE WE ARE WRITTING YOU THIS LETER EH.
WE HAVE AGREED TO SHARE THE MONEY THUS:
1. 70% FOR US (THE OFFICIALS) EH
2. 20% FOR THE FOREIGN PATNER(YOU) EH
3. 10% TO BE USED IN SETTLING TAXATION AND LOCAL AND FOREIGN EXPENSES EH.
IT IS THIS 70% THAT WE WISH TO COMMENCE THE IMPORTATION BUSINESS AND THE INVESTMENT IN EUROPE. PLEASE NOTE THAT THIS TRANSACTION IS 100% SAFE AND WE HOPE THAT THE FUNDS CAN ARRIVE YOUR ACCOUNT IN LATEST TEN(10) BANKING DAYS FROM THE DATE OF RECIEPT OF THE FOLLOWING INFORMATION EH. A SUITABLE COMPANY NAME AND BANK ACCOUNT(COMPANY OR PERSONEL) INTO WHICH THE FUNDS CAN BE PAID EH.
THE ABOVE INFORMATION WILL ENABLE US WRITE LETTERS OF CLAIM AND JOB DESCRIPTION RESPECTIVELY EH. THIS WAY WE WILL USE YOUR COMPANY'S NAME TO APPLY FOR PAYMENTS AND RE-AWARD THE CONTRACT TO YOUR COMPANY NAME EH.
WE ARE LOOKING FOWARD TO DOING BUSINESS WITH YOU AND SOLICIT YOUR CONFIDENTIALITY IN THIS TRANSACTION EH.
PLEASE ACKNOWLEDGE RECIEPT OF THIS LETTER USING THIS E-MAIL ADDRESS EH. I WILL BRING YOU INTO THE COMPLETE PICTURE OF THIS PENDING PROJECT WHEN I HAVE HEARD FROM YOU EH.
YOURS FATHFULLY EH,
HON. RAYMOND ETIEBET(DR).
FAX:234-1-7596980 TEL:234-1-4701056 EH
__ Someday, but not this morning, I'll finally learn to use the preview button.
the nigerian spams are my favorite! in the days of penis/breast enlarging, at least the nigerian spams had a modicum of effort put into them and an interesting story.....
I don't understand! How come these Nigerian guys live in Australia, and now Canada? The guy I sent money to was hiding out in the British Embassy in Lagos?!
i helped him out and i made a bundle! with the money, i bought a great house with a fantastic mortgage. then i married a beautiful russian bride, and i pleasure her with my surgically enlarged, viagra driven member.
Now even Nigerians are outsourcing their functions? Will Wonders Never Cease!
Those were the only truly *funny* spams to read.
Kind of like listening to the Iraqi Information Minister
Boy do I miss him!
-- TT
TT
My work bud finally had enough of this Nigerian scam that he decided he would a have a little fun with the situation. His deed of daring do is a damn hilarious read!
Quod scripsi, scripsi.
Click (here) and enter your email here if you want to sell me methods to increase the size of my sexual organs.
Click (here) and enter your email if you want to sell me spam stopping software.
Click (here) and enter your email if you want to use me to transfer ridiculously large sums of cash for a profitable percentage.
Click (here) and enter your email if you want me to join your dating service
Click (here) and enter your email if you want me to refinance using your service.
EULA has small print that says: Note, all buttons forward your email address to the previous clicker. Too bad, I can't require emailers to give me their correct forwarding address.
excitingthingstodo.blogspot.com
IMHO, it's the best one ever; without selling any punches, it ends in bloodshed :-)...