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Home DNA Sequencing
An anonymous reader writes "Wired is running an article about high-tech gifts for Christmas, including a home DNA sequencing kit targeted at kids for under $100. What's next, the Fisher Price Cloning kit?"
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This kit will install Claria spyware in your genetic code.
"What's next, the Fisher Price Cloning kit?"
Man, I hope not: those Fisher Price kids are genetic disasters. Most of them are bald, have some type of head enlarging disorder, as well as lack of arms and legs. I've even seen one with a pan on his head.
Now Weebles: there's your evolutionary high road...
Vincent J. Murphy
Spandex Justice
when I get here early and have to RTFA instead of the posts
Now, your kids can check if you are their real father for themselves.
I think a lot of kids wil be very happy with this information.
--> Insert Funny Sig Here
until little jamie finds out that he and daddy share no genetic material, before this gets released, let me buy shares in the paper divorce orders are printed on ...
;)
Music is everybody's possession.
It's only publishers who think that people own it.
Fuck Beta
~John Lenno
Mommy's Little Mouthpiece Teddy Ruxpin goes wireless. Plug Wabi's transmitter into a phone jack, call a designated toll-free number, and record a message. At selected intervals, the transmitter collects the data and sends it to the ursine bot's receiver over a 900-MHz signal. The bear giggles when it gets a message, and your kid simply presses its badge to play the audio. "Hi, Billy! Mommy and Daddy don't love you anymore. I'm in charge now, and things are going to change around this house, dammit!"
Great. Now we can give them Chucky Doll for present.
If only i had something like that when my little sister annoyed me.
Slashdot Sig. version 0.1alpha. Use at your own risk.
"Luke, I'm NOT your father after all"
"NOOOOOOOOOO" *cries like a girl*
Will code a sig generator for food
Finally I can find that elusive gene for intimate knowlegde of d&d ver 3.5...
Now all I need is the gene for big breasts, blond hair and low standards, and I might end up with the perfect wife after all.
Just bet you never thought Elroy Jetson would beat out Star Wars, first robots sweeping the carpet (ala Rosie) and now REAL SCIENCE PROJECTS!!!!!!!
Next comes the ejection-bed alarm system!
It doesn't matter what you wrap your emotions around, Reality is a brick wall specifically designed to scramble eggs
You have to be careful however. Last night I downloaded and cloned Madonna, but she just stood there screaming "What the hell do you think you're doing?". It turns out that companies post fake DNA to flood the network. Bummer! It was such a pain disassembling the clone afterwards too.
That's right, kids, for only $100, you have the opportunity to hold your true parentage over your mom's head. With that kind of power, you can do anything you want!
....to the age old question by all the kids that never fit in, and always wondered if they were really adopted.
Punctanym: alternate spelling of words using punctuation or numerals in place of some or all of its letters; see 'leet'
Manipulate the moderator system! Mod someone as "overrated" today.
Non-Geeks have been performing stochastic DNA recombination for hundreds of thousands, perhaps even millions of years. It seems that the secret ingredient is...a girlfriend!