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2003 Vaporware Awards
7x7 writes "Wired News has the 2003 Vaporware Awards available for your perusal. Winning the Lifetime Achievement Award, if you hadn't guessed already: Duke Nukem Forever!"
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Perhaps someone should comprise a list of things that should of been vaporware, for the sake of corporations that stupidly put them out and consumers who shelled out cash for them. NGage anyone?
Mike
...do these awards, erm, ever get presented? :)
These sigs are more interesting tha
Winning the Lifetime Achievement Award, if you hadn't guessed already: Duke Nukem Forever!
How do you think it got its name in the first place?
"I turn away with fright and horror from the lamentable evil of functions which do not have derivatives."
I would have voted for "SCO's Evidence Against Linux" had the thought crossed my mind.
Trolling is a art,
GNU Hurd didn't make it into the list. Odd....:-)
I'm surprised the Iraqi anthrax factories didn't make the list.
All's true that is mistrusted
Lets give it up for WMD ladies and gentlemen!
*cough* Well, I did say it was Vaporwar. :-)
Come on, out of who knows how many votes for AmigaOS 4, they picked me?
Karma Whoring for Fun and Profit.
I think I might have pre-ordered DNF, but I have moved 4 times since, and have a feeling some lucky person will end up with my copy in 2054.
Holy crap, think about, all those people that pre-ordered will end up buying another copy just because they forgot they preordered.
huh?
HTML standards-compliant Slashcode. ;)
I think we should take a poll to rename the word "Vaporware" to "Duke Nukem".
Then next year we can have " the 2003 Duke Nukem Awards"..
Ahh, just a thought...
The SCO Group seems to have promised, but never delivered, UNIX code that was "copied verbatim" into Linux . None of the millions of lines, 65 files, or some new type of undefined intellectual property have yet materialized.
Hey, maybe this isn't as much a troll as I thought. Oh well, the mod points are yours.
------UNIX is a registered trademark of The Open Group in the U.S. and other countries
Linux is a trademark of Linus Torvalds.
sigs, as if you care.
A Lifetime Achievement Award goes to Duke Nukem Forever on the suggestion of reader Jeff White, who wrote, "First proposed in 1801 (or something close to that), Duke Nukem Forever has now come to define the term 'vaporware.' I wouldn't be surprised if dictionaries actually began printing it: 'vaporware: n. See Duke Nukem Forever.'"
Don't be suprised, Jeff. Wikipedia has bested you
1) anounce game, setup preorder
2) delay game so long that people forget they pre ordered and buy another copy.
3) Profit!
Its a real busness plan.
JACEM
DOC Disinformation Obfuscation and Confusion
The carrot to FUD's stick
Yeah, I can sure download it but it refuses to run my copy of Duke Nukem Forever. So what's the point?
I've recently begun work on the next-generation game engine called "WMD Hunt". Current version is 0.0.001-pre-alpha. Notable changes include leveraging multiple synergies across player groups and enabling your gaming buddies to achieve your goals via graft and military-industrial contracts. Some degree of randomness has been added to account for the "lone strikers" play meme. I'm still trying to speedup and optimise the UN code though - it's slow enough that most players won't be able to use that option. Also, the "relative agression level" needs to be more fine-grained; You could be agressive towards your own relatives, or turn your level down instead of simply having a blanket policy. As opposed to a *real* blanket, if your home was recently destroyed.
C|N>K
There was a product -- I don't remember the name -- which was supposed to be a module you could drop into a conventional 35mm film camera that would turn it into a digital camera. It never materialized, of course.
Honorary Member of Jackie Chan's Kung Fu Process Servers
How does the stealing of source code delay shipping?
Well DUH! It was stolen. Don't you watch ST:Voyager? When someone downloads something from you (like your EMH), you no longer have it.
If you need further proof of this, just ask anyone in the RIAA or MPAA.
[drumroll.....] ....catchy huh?
.
"Little Piggies That Should Never Have Went to Market"
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A goal is a dream with a deadline
Agreed. I still have my Team Fortress 2 poster hanging on the wall. At the bottom it says "MARCH" but for the life of my I can't remember what year. I think it was '98 or'99.
Does anyone here know the story of why Duke Nukem Forever has become vaporware? I'm interested in the seedy underbelly of the gaming industry.
Well, after Duke 3D, Duke made the time to play with himself... too much time.
--
In London? Need a Physics Tutor?
American Weblog in London
I don't get it. If Prez Bush doesn't have WMD, then what do we have in all those silos in Montana?
-Flakbait
Temporary Minister of Propoganda for the Assyrian Empire
I think I know something else that should be on that list.
::Nods head at George Bush::
--
In London? Need a Physics Tutor?
American Weblog in London
At this rate, it'll get here in, oh, I don't know, 2012.....
Life is hard, and the world is cruel
I hate it when people think that MT is nothing more than silos....just because we are 3x the size of most states (for instance, SC), and have 1/3 of said southern state, we are considered to be nothing more than a nuclear weapon storage facility. I'll have you know that we have COWS here too, lots of 'em! Antelope too! :P
You know, the secure version of Windows (tm) that isn't susceptible to buffer overflows, viruses, or scripting attacks? The one that will run all existing software? The one that's safe to use on a wide-band, always-on internet connection? The one we've been promised since, what, 1998?
March ain't just a month, soldier.
-- Hamster
And I, for one, welcome our new boobie overlords!
If you had nuts on your chin, would they be chin nuts?
Come on, admiting that he actually bought the game might have cost him his eternal soul.
It is human nature to take shortcuts in thinking.
I wonder if they'll put that on the box, if/when it ever comes out:
"Duke Nukem winner of _many_ vaporware awards!"
in girum imus nocte et consumimur igni
I don't know whether to laugh at you or take pity on you.
Who am I kidding. (snicker).
"Learning is not compulsory... neither is survival."
--Dr.W.Edwards Deming
I'll post one shortly ! Don't anyone else respond to this, because you'll be wasting the effort.
Shouldn't the #1 vaporware of 2003 be Iraq's Weapons of Mass Destruction?
cpeterso