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Vapor Trails - On Famously Unreleased Videogames

Posted by simoniker on from the virtua-laughing-fit dept.

Thanks to GamePro for its article discussing formerly in-development videogames which never actually got released. Some of the more unconventional include Data East's Tattoo Assassins ("2D video-captured fighters, whose tattoos come to life and whack on other players. Characters included a Nancy Kerrigan clone and a giant running hot dog"), Sega's Virtua Hamster ("...[involving] polygonal rodents with rocket packs and skateboards swooshing through a huge hamster habitrail, collecting popcorn kernels to spit at enemies"), and Runandgun!'s partially resurrected Duelin' Firemen! ("...[an FMV] game about singing, dancing firemen [starring Rudy Ray Moore].")

13 of 64 comments (clear)

  1. Oh 3D Realms by The-Bus · · Score: 5, Funny

    I think anything 3D Realms announces doesn't come out. Duke is an obvious choice but let's not forget Prey either...

    But once it comes out, rest assured I will be playing it on my Glaze3D chip. Maybe they'll even port it to the Phantom!

    --

    Small potatoes make the steak look bigger.

  2. Tattoo Assassins... by Lazyhound · · Score: 5, Informative

    ...is actually available as a MAME ROM now.

    1. Re:Tattoo Assassins... by Lazyhound · · Score: 4, Informative

      Also, holy ****, the GamePro article is a word-for-word reprint of a feature they published in the magazine about four years ago, with one or two games added. How lame is that?

    2. Re:Tattoo Assassins... by *weasel · · Score: 3, Funny

      as lame as gamepr....
      hm...

      maybe we shoulda seen that coming

      --
      // "Can't clowns and pirates just -try- to get along?"
  3. Virtual Hamster?? by osullish · · Score: 5, Funny

    I would love to know what they were smoking when they thought of that!

    Stoned Developer 1 : "uugh dude, (takes a deep puff..) do you know what there isn't enough of in games to day?"
    Stoned Developer 2 :"uugh I dunno dude"
    Stoned Developer 1 :"Hamsters man, just think about it dude.."
    Stoned Developer 2 :"crazeeee man"

    --
    It's hard enough to remember my opinions, never mind the reasons for them..
    1. Re:Virtual Hamster?? by Yorrike · · Score: 4, Funny

      Stoned Developer 2 :"Dude! (takes another puff), you know what else is missing?"
      Stoned Developer 1 :"Whassat?"
      Stoned Developer 2 :"Fuckin', games, like, where you fire angry lightbulbs at hopped up rainbows while flying backwards through Atlanis on a hunk of cheese!"
      Stoned Developer 1 :"Dude!"

      --

      Looks can be deceiving. Or CAN they?

  4. hamsters? been done. by *weasel · · Score: 4, Funny

    go for the eyes boo, GO FOR THE EYES!

    --
    // "Can't clowns and pirates just -try- to get along?"
  5. Re:Dueling Firemen by pezpunk · · Score: 3, Insightful

    seriously! i watched the trailer for this and my jaw just went slack. timothy leary, mark mothersbaugh, steve albini, and the guy that created Dolemite are in it. the other actors, though, are kinda weird. it's really hard to discern any details from that website, but apparently this was going to be a 3DO title?!?! seriously wacked. the trailer opens (i THINK) with 2 airplanes crashing into downtown Chicago, and lots of high-rises bursting into flames ... oddly prescient for 1996. apparently the citizenry of chicago reacts by doing 500 hits of acid each and throwing a big party. aliens(?) arrive. firemen breakdance. timothy leary turns into Max Headroom. what the fuck?

    --
    i could live a little longer in this prison
  6. I would think Malice for tXBox deserves a mention. by freidog · · Score: 5, Interesting

    Malice was one of the titles used to show of the power of the XBox before it was released . If you paid attention to the XBox hype, chances are you saw some Malic screenshots.
    It was widely expected to be a release title in fact. But here 3+ years latter, no release date ia availibe, the Official webpage no longer exists, and we've heard nothing from Argonaut Games in the last year or so.

  7. Warcraft Adventures by Clomer · · Score: 3, Insightful

    I'm surprised that nobody has mentioned WarCraft Adventures: Lord of the Clans. It was to be Blizzard's first adventure game, but was cancelled as a nearly complete game. Oh well, at least the story is now available as a novel. And it is part of WarCraft official cannon, as it plays into the setup of WarCraft III.

    --
    Intelligent responses welcome, flames will be met with marshmallows.
  8. Fallout 3 & Xcom by samsmithnz · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Don't forget about the ill-fated Fallout 3...
    http://www.petitiononline.com/fallout3/petition.ht ml
    http://www.gamespot.com/pc/rpg/fallout3/news_60856 20.html

    and XCom, I don't know how many times this project has been canned and then resurected again 2 years later...
    http://dynamic.gamespy.com/~xcom/x6x1.shtml
    http://dynamic.gamespy.com/~xcom/x8x1.shtml

    These are the two biggies for me...

  9. Penn & Teller's Smoke and Mirrors by Pluvius · · Score: 3, Interesting

    If I had to pick one piece of vaporware I'd want to be able to play, this would be it. It was a bunch of screwed-up mini-games, including this one where you have to drive from somewhere to Las Vegas in a tour bus. I remember reading a preview for it in Video Games (aka the best gaming mag ever); a couple of the staff members actually took turns playing the tour bus game for like eight hours before they accidentally wrecked and ruined all their "progress."

    Rob

  10. Ben, we hardly knew ye by spyrochaete · · Score: 3, Interesting

    Too bad the world will never see Full Throttle 2. Lucasarts axed it because it did not meet their high quality standards. Also, the actor who voiced the protagonist Ben passed away a year or two ago. Shame. The original was a cool, cool game.