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John Woo & Metroid the Movie?

Posted by CmdrTaco on from the thats-a-little-creepy dept.

An anonymous reader writes "John Woo has optioned Nintendo's best-selling video game franchise Metroid for the big screen, says The Hollywood Reporter. Woo will produce the sci-fi movie and has the option to direct. The plan is to release the first film before 2006. The movie will center on the origins of the game's female protagonist, sexy bounty hunter Samus Aran, and relate her adventures battling the insidious life-sucking Metroids and their controlling force, Mother Brain."

17 of 446 comments (clear)

  1. Woo! by shadowcabbit · · Score: 5, Funny

    I'm sold on the idea. I just wonder how he's going to get the doves to fly through space.

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  2. what I want to know... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    If women start dressing and acting like Samus Aran, will they be called metroidsexuals?

  3. Oh, god... by Psmylie · · Score: 5, Insightful

    I just hope they don't try to make Samus "sexy". The last thing this movie needs is some bubble-brained ditz bouncing around Zebes in a slinky catsuit. What's great about Samus is that she totally whoops butt. And no fricken' Liv Tyler!

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    1. Re:Oh, god... by AKAImBatman · · Score: 5, Interesting

      It would be even better if they kept her gender a secret until later in the movie. Hardcore video game enthusists would know the secret, but it would be a surprise for everyone else. Even better would be to throw out some indirection to make the gamers thing that they changed her to a he for the movie. :-D

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    2. Re:Oh, god... by katarac · · Score: 5, Funny

      Yeah right. She'll be revealed as a woman in the first preview.

      "Intergalactic pirates threaten to take over the galaxy with the help of a terrifying new organism. But not if she *show samus getting out of her on-ship shower* has anything to say about it. *a bunch of shit blows up*"

  4. Once again by Tebriel · · Score: 5, Funny

    I weep for humanity, for I remember the Super Mario Bros. movie.

    No good can come from this.

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  5. They should do like the original game.. by pacsman · · Score: 5, Interesting

    and hide the main character in a suit so people who never played the game don't realize she's a she until the very end when she takes off her helmet. They should not, however, emulate the game's graphics or endlessly confusing mazes. However, the turning into a ball and other stuff of that nature would be cool.

  6. It seems oddly appropriate.. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    ..that John Woo would license a movie of which the central theme is the destruction of a brain.

  7. Why this will suck... by wumarkus420 · · Score: 5, Insightful

    Other than the fact that John Woo movies suck.

    As mentioned earlier, they will try to get some sexy chick to play Samus, when the REAL reason the first metroid game for Nintendo was so BADASS was because you didn't find out she was a girl until the end. I think they should do the same thing here, but unfortunately, I expect some boring actress that has never seen a Nintendo to be yelling out stupid catch phrases during multiple explosions resulting in another bullshit Woo movie that *could* have been cool. He's like the shitty pop-star director equivalent of a Britney Spears when it comes to quality.

  8. Bonus features planned for video release? by mopslik · · Score: 5, Funny

    If I fast-forward the movie, watching it in less than 2 hours, will I get to see Samus in a skimpy bikini?

  9. If I remember my Nintendo Power correctly. by Keldian · · Score: 5, Insightful

    This said it was about the origin of Samus. I would assume this would include her upbringing by the aliens that made the suit for her, so there will be no hiding that she is a she. I imagine the first half of the movie will be her growing up, and the second half will be her kicking butt in the suit. It will really just be your standard super hero movie, excpet set in space.

  10. Woo by dolo666 · · Score: 5, Interesting

    You're right. He does better with less. I really liked his early movies, but all his recent ones reek of Hollywood money-magic. Every shot, every plot, every thought has to rock or forget it, IMHO. Instead of "The Natives take the fort", try actually going into detail about it, and examine the usefullness of shots in their reflection of plots. Metroid movie? Sounds like an easy out, because Woo will only have to film it from the side!

  11. Re:Back to Basics by hambonewilkins · · Score: 5, Funny
    Pong: the Movie.

    -In a world where wars are settled on a rudimentary tennis court, one man must struggle to beat right paddle.

    Tom Cruise is left paddle.
    "Right paddle, you are going down!"

    Nicholas Cage is right paddle.
    "Paddle... ball, I feel crazy here!"

    And Uma Thurman is ball.

    Pong: A John Woo film.

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  12. John Woo??! no please! by Zangief · · Score: 5, Insightful

    I think that a Metroid Movie should be an almost silent one. Depicting the loneliness of Samus against the mysterious space pirates and Metroids.

    John Woo is specialist on complicated and espectacular stunts. Metroid shines on putting you on an alien world. You don't go with your guns blazing in Metroid, dodging bullets ala Matrix.

    This has the potential to suck

  13. WTF? by Infonaut · · Score: 5, Funny
    Why are you posting on Slashdot? Your ability to hold a nuanced view is despicable. I like the binary "your opinion sucks" arguments Slashdot *used to* have before people like you came along.

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  14. The arcade by Raunch · · Score: 5, Funny

    http://www.penny-arcade.com/view.php3?date=2002-11 -13&res=l

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  15. Or if under 6 hours, maybe just without the visor? by FearTheFrail · · Score: 5, Funny

    If the movie can go from start to finish in less than 3 hours, will we see Samus in a skimpy outfit at the end, after the credits?

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