Slashdot Mirror
FSF Subpoenaed by SCO
An anonymous reader writes "Bradley M. Kuhn on the FSF website: Late last year, we were subpoenaed by SCO as part of the ongoing dispute
between SCO and IBM. Today, we made that
subpoena available on our website. This is a broad subpoena that
effectively asks for every single document about the GPL and enforcement
of the GPL since 1999. They also demand every document and email that we
have exchanged with Linus Torvalds, IBM, and other players in the
community. In many cases, they are asking for information that is
confidential communication between us and our lawyers, or between us and
our contributors."
At least they got a check for $30 out of it!
Will RMS testify in his St. Ignucius costume.
I say you should download every mail list, usenet archive, and online discussion group, then print it all out on 10,000 pages. Throw in RFCs and source code to bulk it up a bit.
_______
2B1ASK1
Assure them that you have the documents they, and also that you have undeniable proof of the documents. Refuse to provide them, on ground that it would violate agreements you have with certain parties (don't mention who these parties are).
If all else fails, claim that you cannot provide the documents because it is a matter of national security.
2003 was a very good year for learning new stonewalling techniques...
$8.95/mo web hosting
The law firm misspelled their own name in the subpoena: "Boise Schiller & Flexner".
just print out every resulting page from a goodle search of GNU GPL Linux, including subsearches on images, groups, and froogle. also, print out any non english results by sending them through babelfish.
print all the results on 3x5 notecards, in 7 pt font. in binary. naw, binary would be too easy to scan and convert to digital with OCR. make it some crazy bubble letter font. any resulting images convert to ascii art. any froogle results, purchase them and have the sent Cost on Delivery to SCO Headquarters. Which by now is probably the backseat of a Pinto, about to blow up because they shut the door too hard.
I actually have a rubber stamp on my desk that stamps the phrase
THIS DOCUMENT OFFICIALLY
-------DOES NOT EXIST-------
See here for a scanned image of the impression.
I have yet to see it held up in court, but any time I print a document I don't want to have to worry about, I smack it with the stamp and put it in a file drawer.
I keep it right next to my What the *#*$# were you thinking? rubber stamp that I had custom made. That one seems to be getting an awful lot of use recently...
A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing -- Emo Phillips
Dear FSF,
All your documents are belong to us. Here's 30 bucks to cover your copying costs (in case you didn't get that this is a big "fuck you", let us clarify that for you - "FUCK YOU"). Toodle-oo!
Yours truly,
Your buddies at Dewey, Stickham and Howe
At the hearing: "Your honor, it was addressed to whom it may concern. None of us were particularly concerned, so we trashed it."
As an alternative, they could just send backup tapes of the hard drives off of every server which FSF earns, and let Boies and company figure out how to extract the data. Extra points for using an obscure/obsolete tape format.
It's good to use your head, but not as a battering ram.
Plaintiff: give us everything.
Subpoenee: we give you nothing.
Plaintiff: okay, how bout half?
Subpoenee: we'll give you everything RMS has said about software licensing.
Plaintiff: uh...
Subpoenee: and everything he's said to women at cons.
Plaintiff: got a court date, talk to you later. Subpoenee: and a recording of the song.
Subpoenee: Hello?