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SCO Caps Legal Expenses At $31 Million

uniqueCondition points to a story on News.com, writing "With SCO's legal costs reaching $7.3 million in their most recent quarter, nearly half of the $15 million it has spent in the last five quarters, SCO can't afford this kind of litigation. They have therefore limited their payment to $31 million for the entire case and is giving their legal team a larger slice of any settlement SCO achieves. Under the current agreement, the firm's contingency payment is 20 percent of a settlement. Under the new agreement, that increases to a range of 20 to 33 percent." uniqueCondition links also to coverage at Techrepublic.com, InformationWeek and The Inquirer.

32 of 341 comments (clear)

  1. Might buy ya by DarkLox · · Score: 1, Funny

    31 Million Dollars might buy you a few hours lawyer time nowadays....sheesh.

    --
    Momma told me that sigs are for the devil
  2. What exactly is a larger slice by Trigun · · Score: 5, Funny

    of total annihilation?

    Sounds like a sound investment to me!

  3. Oooh, a bigger fraction of zero by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny
    [SCO] is giving their legal team a larger slice of any settlement SCO achieves.
    SCO's "legal team?" Given their performance to date, I imagine that the sole member of their "team" is probably Chim Chim (the monkey from Speed Racer). He'll be a sad monkey though, cause 22-33% of nothing means no more bananas.
    1. Re:Oooh, a bigger fraction of zero by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      The Judge has been very careful, very measured, and I guess, just giving SCO time to really make sure, before they meet his wrath.

      Uh... the judge is *meant* to be impartial. Unless...

      Judge's verdict: Darl McBride, SCO board and lawyers sentenced to death.
      Shock in courtroom.

      Darl starts mouthing off... "this isn't a murder trial".... "guilty of what?"... "this'll be struck down on appeal, asshole".

      "Silence!" yells the judge with such conviction that those present turn and face him.

      The judge, face covered by a cowl, takes one gloved hand, and makes a strangulation gesture, slowly but surely tightening his grip. As the SCO team start to have severe trouble breathing, a chink of light moves over the judge's cowl, revealing his face.

      "Tux!" gasps McBride with his last breath.

      Judge Tux laughs evilly as McBride and cronies expire, one-by-one.

      Hundreds of geeks rush over the now still corpses of SCO, and hug Judge Tux in gratitude.

      Tux sits back with an expression of stoned satisfaction.... well, the same damned expression he *always* wears, actually.

      "One thing," asks one of the geeks. "Where did you get those supernatural powers? I always thought you were a simple penguin, and yet... what you did there, I mean...."

      A small red figure steps out of the shadows.

      "Tux?" smiles the cute, but evil, sneaker-clad daemon. "Oh yes. Tux is just an ordinary penguin. I think he forgot that without me, he would be... nothing. But I grow tired of his arrogance...."

      The daemon takes his hand and makes the same strangulation gesture as Judge Tux made before. Tux holds his flippers to his throat, but is powerless to prevent his inevitable death at the hands of the daemon.
      His corpse lies lifeless on the floor, surrounded by disbelieving geeks.

      "So.... *BSD is dying, is it, my geek friends?"

      Geeks shake their heads nervously.

      "Too late!" yells the daemon. "Looks like I'm the only one who won't be dying around here today".

      With a wave of his hands, BSD daemon slams every exit in the room shut and sets the curtains on fire.

      Within minutes, the room is a scene of horror and carnage; there is no escape for the massed ranks of business reporters, and Linux geeks.

      BSD daemon smiles....

      "Netcraft... you're next."

      The End.

    2. Re:Oooh, a bigger fraction of zero by red+floyd · · Score: 2, Funny

      They have the best expert witnesses that blow SCO's out of the water

      Yeah. I'm dying to see how SCOX will try to discredit Brian Kernighan. That should be fun to watch.

      --
      The only reason we have the rights we have is that people just like us died to gain those rights. -- Cheerio Boy
  4. Oh Nos! by GeekDork · · Score: 1, Funny

    Them lawyers are gunna starve!

    --

    Fight hunger. Filet a politician and send him to a 3rd world country of your choice.

  5. What settlement? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Having watched the carnage from the first, IANAL, but it seems to me that it isn't likely that SCO will recieve a settlement in this case. It seems far more likely that they'll be stumped.

    Ah well, atleast the lawyers will be well taken care of.... Probably the execs too...

  6. A hundred percent of nothing is still nothing. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    Might as well invest in losing lottery tickets.

  7. Re:Begging to be bought out by ideonode · · Score: 4, Funny

    we are concerned about somebody who would be opportunistic

    Mr. Pot, have you met Mr. Kettle?

  8. Re:But 20 to 33 percent... by StalinsNotDead · · Score: 3, Funny

    And it's not even *all* of the nothing. What a gyp.

    --
    Thanks to the internet, we can now all die alone together! -SomeWoman
  9. On the day of closing statements... by Vexler · · Score: 5, Funny

    Judge: You may go ahead with your closing statement.
    SCO: Yes, Your Honor. Ladies and gentlemen, this is a case about intellec... (looks at watch abruptly) Oh, sorry, I guess the fund ran out just now. Another day, another trial. (Picks up briefcase, then bolts.)

  10. Works on contingency? by sczimme · · Score: 2, Funny


    No, money down!

    /I move for a bad... court... thingy.

    --
    I want to drag this out as long as possible. Bring me my protractor.
  11. A large percentage of the settlement? by Zangief · · Score: 5, Funny

    Does this means that if the judge "settles" that Darl spends his next 10 years in jail, he actually gets 4 years, and the lawyers get 6 years?

    Sounds good to me...

  12. Re:But 20 to 33 percent... by the_denman · · Score: 2, Funny

    well they have to still have some of that nothing to give to their stock holders in the end

  13. Re:Begging to be bought out by metlin · · Score: 3, Funny

    Do not know if we are talking about the same pot, but hell, I sure as hell would like to have some of what Darl seems to be smoking ;-)

  14. opportunistic by HogGeek · · Score: 5, Funny

    I think every slashdotter should chip in $100, and WE buy SCO!

    1. Re:opportunistic by sploo22 · · Score: 5, Funny
      Let's see, if 10% of all slashdot members contribute, that's $70 million right there. I've got a few ideas:
      • The Half-Life 2 engine
      • 3D Studio Max
      • WinFS
      • Hire a team of /. editors who actually do something


      Nah... scratch that last one. It'll never happen in my lifetime anyway.
      --
      Karma: Segmentation fault (tried to dereference a null post)
    2. Re:opportunistic by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      What a great idea!!!
      Scashdot - News for lawyers. Litigation that matters.

  15. They. Are. Smoking. Crack. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Saving face?

    SCO: Hello Mr. Lawyer, will you take on our surefire case against Linux?
    Lawyer: Surefire? Ha ha... *ahem*
    (SCO hands lawyer large wad of cash)
    Lawyer: Of course I will, my good man.

    Many large wads of cash later:-
    SCO: Mr. Lawyer, we cannot afford to pay you any more. Will you continue the battle if we divide the spoils with you?
    Lawyer: What spoils?
    SCO: When we win our case
    Lawyer: Win? Have you been smoking crack again?
    SCO: We paid you all that money.... please go along with this.
    Lawyer: We'll *continue* to go along with this if you pay us more money. Why do you think we took this on in the first place?
    SCO: Do you work for magic beans?
    Lawyer: No, fuck off.

    Press release issued where Darl McBride mentions something about "focusing on our core business of selling Unix". Everyone laughs.

    1. Re:They. Are. Smoking. Crack. by Caseyscrib · · Score: 3, Funny
      haha. The last sentance reminds me of the simpsons episode where the Homer squirts the jockeys and says "Marge, get me a trash bag." Following is a cut scene to the jockeys going "Please let us out. We'll give you gold!"

      The point i'm trying to make here is that is SCO employees are just a bunch of midget jockeys. Yeah... thats right.

  16. Re:To bail or not to bail by kevmit · · Score: 5, Funny
    "Principles? Remember who we're dealing with..."
    Exactly. Note to SCO: "Scruple" and "Screw People" are not the same thing.
  17. Muppets by chill · · Score: 5, Funny

    Just to show my age...

    The first thing that popped into my mind was an episode of the Muppett Show I was when I was but a wee lad.

    Fozzee Bear wanted a raise and brought in his agent (a rat) to negotiate w/Kermit the Frog. Kermit worked the rat into a frenzy (100% raise...no, 200%...no, 300%!) getting everyone all hype.

    Then Kermit left and the rat asked Fozzee what he made before. $0. The rat was, well now you get 300% of that! And remember, I get 30% of THAT!

    Sad.

    --
    Learning HOW to think is more important than learning WHAT to think.
  18. Re:The *Actual* FleeceMasters Here... by Mateito · · Score: 4, Funny
    Darl's teats

    Boise swinging off Darl's nipples was really not an image I needed... but thanks anyway.

  19. Re:source license revenue from where by Just+Some+Guy · · Score: 2, Funny
    they now count "Unix licenses" in the deal since they give out a "Linux license" with every Unix purchase.

    OK, so that accounts for another 3.

    Seriously, is anyone rolling out OneTrueUnixware on new deployments? Frankly, I'd summarily fire anyone who suggested we use it for anything other than maintaining a legacy system.

    --
    Dewey, what part of this looks like authorities should be involved?
  20. We should pay for SCO 's code by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    If you all started paying for your unix/linux, instead of pirating them. Then poor SCO wouldn't be in this situation.

  21. Re:The worst part is... by Just+Some+Guy · · Score: 4, Funny
    Anyways I go to the same church ward as Ralph Yarro (Chairman of the Board of SCO, and CEO of Canopy Group)

    Want to have more success with new recruitment? Swing by the CompSci department at a non-Mormon college:

    You: Hi! Would you like to learn about the second gospel of Jesus Christ?
    Them: Argh! A cyclist in a necktie - run!
    You: Did I mention that the guy from SCO goes to my church?
    Them: What time should I be there?

    Man, I'm a dyed-in-the-wool Southern Baptist, but even I would be willing to swing by for a little face time.

    --
    Dewey, what part of this looks like authorities should be involved?
  22. Poor Darl by mehaiku · · Score: 4, Funny

    Through lawyers the courts Darl has mocked
    Jail is where he will be locked
    It will not be funny
    When Darl's out of money
    Then he'll pump more than just stock

  23. Larger "slice" of the settlement? by swillden · · Score: 4, Funny

    They have therefore limited their payment to $31 million for the entire case and is giving their legal team a larger slice of any settlement SCO achieves. Under the current agreement, the firm's contingency payment is 20 percent of a settlement. Under the new agreement, that increases to a range of 20 to 33 percent.

    But the way things are shaping up, any settlement between SCO and IBM is going to require SCO to pay large amounts of money to IBM in order to get IBM to drop the copyright infringement claims, the patent infringement claims, the Lanham Act claims, etc., because IBM's attorneys are quickly demolishing all of SCO's claims.

    IMO, the lawyers should have to pony up 20% to 33% of *that* settlement. They should get a "slice" all right...

    --
    Note to ACs: I usually delete AC replies without reading them. If you want to talk to me, log in.
  24. Re:Begging to be bought out by funaho · · Score: 4, Funny

    I think they're on something a little stronger than pot. Think about it...if they were smoking pot, they would have sat around and TALKED about suing IBM for five billion dollars, then giggled a lot and continued to sit around and until they decided to make a taco bell run and ended up forgetting all about IBM. :)

  25. Re:Begging to be bought out by arch17c7 · · Score: 3, Funny

    Plus, they could get the satisfaction of firing Darl McBride.

    Fire him? No, no, no, no, far too easy. Perhaps a demotion to the job of cleaning dust from the insides of old servers in the warehouse, or maybe even offering mints and cologne to upper management in the corporate washrooms. He's already familiar with the bottoms of toilets, since that seems to be where his ideas are coming from.

  26. I see it comming... by WillRobinson · · Score: 4, Funny


    ERROR: divide by 0

  27. They will! by freeze128 · · Score: 2, Funny

    Lawyers can and will work for free. It's called Pro Boner.

    I know what I said...