Windows Viruses up Sharply in 2004

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Windows Viruses up Sharply in 2004

Posted by CmdrTaco on Monday September 20, 2004 @06:51AM from the as-proven-by-my-inbox dept.

Brad1138 writes "MSNBC has an article regarding the proliferation of Windows Viruses and collaboration among virus writers and spammers. Also mentions the likelihood that viruses for Linux and handhelds will see a sharp rise."

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This just in: by Control+Group · 2004-09-20 06:52 · Score: 5, Funny

In other news, Hallmark reports that the number of holidays requiring you to buy an amusing greeting card rose by 173% last year. This information is further supported by DeBeers' recent finding that more women than ever before expect to receive diamonds on major holidays.
(Seriously, this information may or may not be true...but can we say "vested interest?")

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Reality has a conservative bias: it conserves mass, energy, momentum...
1. Re:This just in: by Anonymous Coward · 2004-09-20 07:11 · Score: 2, Funny
  
  Please. Our study said natural diamons. Natural. Kindly correct that oversight.
  
  DeBeers Research Department
Linux viruses by unixmaster · 2004-09-20 06:53 · Score: 5, Funny

Porting is always appreciated!

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Never learn by your mistakes, if you do you may never dare to try again
Linux viruses on the rise by jekewa · 2004-09-20 06:53 · Score: 5, Funny

Does that mean that there will be some? Ooh! Can't wait for McAfee for my box!

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End the FUD
In other surprising news........ by i_want_you_to_throw_ · 2004-09-20 06:53 · Score: 4, Funny

Water is wet.
1. Re:In other surprising news........ by ocknock · 2004-09-20 09:17 · Score: 2, Funny
  
  Except the dehydrated stuff.
Viruses up in first half of the year? by Tuffsnake · 2004-09-20 06:54 · Score: 4, Funny

Well, that generally is the cold and flu season :P
Murphy's Microsoft Corrolary by halivar · 2004-09-20 06:56 · Score: 5, Funny

If you install it, they will come.
Wow, that's impressive by Anonymous Coward · 2004-09-20 06:57 · Score: 2, Funny

"Also mentions the likelihood that viruses for Linux and handhelds will see a sharp rise"

The media have this amazing power to decide that something is true simply by saying so. Lucky bastards.
So if the likliehood of a Linux virus were... by hal2814 · 2004-09-20 06:59 · Score: 2, Funny

...up by 300% that would be... ...hmmm, what's 300% of 0?

(This IS just a joke. I'm not sure if there's a Linux virus or not, but I'm not aware of any. Please don't take this e-mail as a recommendation to not patch your Linux boxen regularly or to not take security seriously in Linux.)
One Linux virus = Infinite increase by HermanZA · 2004-09-20 07:01 · Score: 3, Funny

Well, as soon we finally get the first real Linux virus, it will be an enormous increase and then Windows will have some serious catching up to do...
Using Linux is boring - nothing ever goes wrong.
4 Seasons by superpulpsicle · 2004-09-20 07:01 · Score: 3, Funny

Virus

Spyware

Adware

Blue Screen

What's amazing is that in windows land you can have all 4 seasons all year round.
Good to know... by StevenHenderson · 2004-09-20 07:02 · Score: 2, Funny

...that the recession is not hurting virus writers!
Re:HBO also announced by samberdoo · 2004-09-20 07:02 · Score: 1, Funny

Or it could be "Bug-eye for the Microsoft guy"
Viruses Up by chris_mahan · 2004-09-20 07:04 · Score: 5, Funny

In market news, Virus Inc reported stronger-than-expected results, beating street analysis by a broad margin, sending Microsoft lower. Symantec, a promary contractor of Virus Inc, said that they are pleased with the performance "When they do well, we do well" said Ama Popup, director of Marketing at Symatec. Sasser, spokesman for Virus Inc, relayed the management outlook by saying "We expect to migrate our primary products to Linux as soon as it is popular enough to warrant the cost." Asked whether their plans were too optimistic, Sasser replied: "We are fighting against open source hackers who attempt to build security on consumer-grade products. We are confident that the average user will help us defeat such paranoid and counter-productive efforts."

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"Piter, too, is dead."
Viruses?!?!?!?!1 by ral315 · 2004-09-20 07:16 · Score: 3, Funny

Thank goodness I'm smart enough to avoid th...ooh, free Britney Spears pr0n!
Re:Wow thats new.... by Anonymous Coward · 2004-09-20 07:26 · Score: 1, Funny

I for one, welcome our virus replication overlords. For without them, a lot of folks wouldn't have a job.
And water is wet... by Spoing · 2004-09-20 07:34 · Score: 3, Funny

What part of this surprises anyone?

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A firewall can not protect you from yourself. Turn off what you do not need. Do not use the firewall to do your work.
Re:This on the heels of the first virus... by Anonymous Coward · 2004-09-20 08:10 · Score: 3, Funny

One of those IP addresses was mine...127.0.0.1. Should I be worried?
Re:Why there won't be nearly as many Linux-viruses by LilMikey · 2004-09-20 09:51 · Score: 2, Funny

Soon an MCSE will come with VS as well.

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LilMikey.com... I'll stop doing it when you sto