Star Wars TV Show
The lunatick writes "IESB and Theforce.net report a Star Wars TV show. Lucas will not direct it just produce it. Kevin Smith (Silent Bob, the clerks series) is named as a possible director."
← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)
Kevin would have to be a moron to do it. No matter how good the tv series is it will be slammed as not as good as the original. Expecially if you expect 3-5 seasons worth of good stuff. There is no pleasing the star wars fans.
Is there anything that Kevin Smith has not been named as a possible director for? I'm still waiting for his Green Lantern movie.
Darth: "No Luke, I am your father!"
Luke: "You're my dad? Oh boy, and you know what the worst thing is?"
Darth: "What, my son?"
Luke: "I'm not even supposed to be here today!"
Drill baby drill - on Mars
"Do you see a sign on my lawn that says 'Dead Wookie Storage'??"
You're right. If Star Trek hadn't made the mistake of making a TV Show, all the paperbacks and Souvineer LPs and stuff would have been far more successful.
"What's the frequency Kenneth?"
Before everyone suggests this is a bad move I just want to say look at SG1. The original movie was at best 'ok' but thanks to the series the brand is highly valued.
Sorry, can't resist, I just have to post it :)
(taken from http://www.whysanity.net/monos/clerks5.html)
Building the Death Star
written by Kevin Smith
Randal: So they build another Death Star, right?
Dante: Yeah.
Randal: Now the first one they built was completed and fully operational before the Rebels destroyed it.
Dante: Luke blew it up. Give credit where it's due.
Randal:And the second one was still being built when they blew it up.
Dante: Compliments of Lando Calrissian.
Randal: Something just never sat right with me the second time they destroyed it. I could never put my finger on it-something just wasn't right.
Dante: And you figured it out?
Randal: Well, the thing is, the first Death Star was manned by the Imperial army-storm troopers, dignitaries- the only people onboard were Imperials.
Dante: Basically.
Randal: So when they blew it up, no prob. Evil is punished.
Dante: And the second time around...?
Randal: The second time around, it wasn't even finished yet. They were still under construction.
Dante: So?
Randal: A construction job of that magnitude would require a helluva lot more manpower than the Imperial army had to offer. I'll bet there were independent contractors working on that thing: plumbers, aluminum siders, roofers.
Dante: Not just Imperials, is what you're getting at.
Randal: Exactly. In order to get it built quickly and quietly they'd hire anybody who could do the job. Do you think the average storm trooper knows how to install a toilet main? All they know is killing and white uniforms.
Dante: All right, so even if independent contractors are working on the Death Star, why are you uneasy with its destruction?
Randal: All those innocent contractors hired to do a job were killed- casualties of a war they had nothing to do with. (notices Dante's confusion) All right, look-you're a roofer, and some juicy government contract comes your way; you got the wife and kids and the two-story in suburbia-this is a government contract, which means all sorts of benefits. All of a sudden these left-wing militants blast you with lasers and wipe out everyone within a three-mile radius. You didn't ask for that. You have no personal politics. You're just trying to scrape out a living.
(The Blue-Collar Man (Thomas Burke) joins them.)
Blue-Collar Man: Excuse me. I don't mean to interrupt, but what were you talking about?
Randal: The ending of Return of the Jedi.
Dante: My friend is trying to convince me that any contractors working on the uncompleted Death Star were innocent victims when the space station was destroyed by the rebels.
Blue-Collar Man: Well, I'm a contractor myself. I'm a roofer... (digs into pocket and produces business card) Dunn and Reddy Home Improvements. And speaking as a roofer, I can say that a roofer's personal politics come heavily into play when choosing jobs.
Randal: Like when?
Blue-Collar Man: Three months ago I was offered a job up in the hills. A beautiful house with tons of property. It was a simple reshingling job, but I was told that if it was finished within a day, my price would be doubled. Then I realized whose house it was.
Dante: Whose house was it?
Blue-Collar Man: Dominick Bambino's.
Randal: "Babyface" Bambino? The gangster?
Blue-Collar Man: The same. The money was right, but the risk was too big. I knew who he was, and based on that, I passed the job on to a friend of mine.
Dante: Based on personal politics.
Blue-Collar Man: Right. And that week, the Foresci family put a hit on Babyface's house. My friend was shot and killed. He wasn't even finished shingling.
Rand
What has *science* done?!? -- Dr. Weird (ATHF)
I guess that's the good part of the story
I don't read replies by ACs.
...As if the voices of a million Star Wars fans suddenly cried out in terror, and were suddenly silenced...
In my opinion, a Star Wars TV series would work best with the timeline about 5000 years before the Battle of Yavin, which is around the time of action of Knights of the Old Republic. You've got the Sith Wars, the Mandalorian War, and the conflict with Exar Kun going on about that time, and there's a good amount of Jedi and Sith to do battle and tons of interesting worlds as well. With this we could avoid the same old "Empire vs. Rebels/Republic vs. Separatist" nonsense.
Who is gonna change channel first? Me or Greedo?
New. Levels. Of. Yanking. That. Teet.
Oh no, please don't tell me that William Shatner is going to be in it... [runs away screaming]
Karma? Hey I just call it as I see it.
Interesting. Hopefully, they'll either be based on:
;) The problem is twofold- 1) It'd be very, very easy to screw it up and make it really bad, and 2) To the people who haven't read the books in between, it'd look really silly- they finish the Clone Wars to have a Galactic Civil War, then after that go straight to the Yuuzhan Vong Invasion. One enemy for another.
A) After Return of the Jedi- in this case, following the X-wing series (liberation of Coruscant and all) and the Thrawn trilogy (yay!) by Zahn. The problem with this is that the actors are way too old to play Luke and Wedge and Han and Leia and Lando.
B) New Jedi Order. Some of the best books in all of Star Wars. The character shields are GONE- Chewbacca dies, along with a number of Expanded Universe characters throughout the year. The especially useful part is that it takes place 25 years after Return of the Jedi, meaning they could use Mark Hamill and he'd fit right in
If its any different than that, it will be pure crap, nobody will watch it and it will be filed away in the history of TV Land failures, right behind Cop Rock.
-- Mace only makes me hornier.
- CSI: Coruscant
- Law & Order: Imperial Sedition Unit
- Extreme Makeover: Padawan Edition
- The Darth Vader Factor
- Survivor: Dagobah
- Who Wants To Marry A Sith Lord?
- The Apprentice
Damn. Actually I think I'd enjoy some of those."It is our blasphemy which has made us great, and will sustain us, and which the gods secretly admire in us." - Zelazny
You know guys, you could always not watch it.
That pretty much works for me when I don't want to see a TV show.
-sig removed for tax purposes-
" The problem with this is that the actors are way too old to play Luke and Wedge and Han and Leia and Lando."
That is not necessarily a problem. Many movies have gone onto TV series using entirely different casts than the original. The most obvious one that springs to mind is M*A*S*H. Ask just about anyone today "who played Hawkeye in MASH" and I doubt a single person would answer you with "Donald Sutherland"
Granted, the bigscreen version M*A*S*H is not quite on par with Star Wars pop-culture-wise (although when it was first released it was highly successful and the main stars were very identifiable at the time). Also, M*A*S*H fans were probably never quite as obsessive as their Star Wars counterparts.
"You can't fight in here, this is the war room!"
I think the best way to do a Star Wars TV show would be to do it as a combination of the old serials and short stories.
The writers should be telling several stories. Each episode would cover a segment of one story. They might do one or two episodes of one story in a row, then switch over to another story for the next episode.
Maybe they could follow an agent of the Imperial Scouting Service as they explore a new hyperspace route, or a couple of Corporate Sector Authority investigators checking out an industrial espionage situation. Maybe we could see the Black Sun organization, or do a couple of episodes on a Stormtrooper squad, like Troops.
With this format, the show wouldn't be tied to any particular era. They could mix up genres. It certainly wouldn't get boring. There would be unlimited room for growth.
As the series matures, maybe a couple of the storylines could touch each other. Perhaps the industrial espionage operation being investigated by the CSA is the same operation we see getting set up in the Black Sun story.
I tell you, this idea is brilliant! Brilliant, I say!
Now I just need to know who to send it to...
i'd hit it so hard, if you pulled me out you'd be the king of britain [bash.org]