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Google Faces Employee Retention Challenge
prakslash writes "60% of Google's 1900 employees now hold stock options worth at least one million dollars. According to experts in this Reuters article, it is now imperative for Google to maintain its sense of mission. If it fails to do so, a whole slew of employees facing post-IPO burnout and boredom will leave the company to go back to school, start a new company, or join the ranks of high-tech early retirees. Such a mass cashing-out could lead to a decline in Google stock price and intellectual brain-drain. Oh how I wish I worked for Google."
Well send in your CV! It sounds like they might have a few job openings shortly...
I guess Google is finally realizing that there's no such thing as a free lunch (even if they provide their employees with one).
You can. On a volunteer basis, of course.
To quit your job at google go to: {last 10-digit prime found in consecutive digits of e}.com
1900 employees, as in the number of employees Google has, not 1990 employees, as in employed on the date of, which was your interpretation... and would make no sense.
2004-1990 does equal 14, so you can subtract, but it's obvious you can't read.
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Mod me down, you fucking twits. Go ahead. I dare you.
(I read with sigs off.)
CFO: It looks like we have quite a problem, Eric. We are losing employees because their stock options are worth so much, they don't wan't to work anymore.
CEO: The deuce you say, George. There's only one thing to do.
CFO: What's that?
CEO: George, we have to tank the company. When the stock bottoms out, we'll buy back those options and correct the retention problem. We must destroy Google to save it.
CFO: OMFG, you're brillant. But how will we devalue the company? Google is doing great.
CEO: We're going to need help. We need someone with experience in this sort of thing. Get Carly at HP on the phone, quick!
Google seems to already be a step ahead of this problem, creating a billboard puzzle in the Boston area and publishing a test for potential applicats to fill out.
Answer is 7427466391.com thanks to a google search
I, for one, welcome our millionaire overlords. I wish more tech companies had folks who had enough money to retire, so that those who don't have enough money yet would be able to make a bit more and advance their careers a bit faster. Where I work, it's like a freakin' concrete wall up there. Folks who have been with the company are well put in their trenches and it's nearly impossible to get anywhere, because the "old boys club" is everywhere. I wish the stock price doubled and they took off. I'd be a happy camper then.
oh, the moderators irony..
Doolittle :
Bomb no.20 : To explode of course.
which already include an in-house masseuse and free lunches prepared by the former chef to the Grateful Dead.
... by the former chef to the Grateful Dead".
For a moment I thought that read "an in-house massage
"And zeez is how weee tenderize zee meat before we apply zee hot sauce... bork! bork! bork!"
Vintage computer adverts: http://www.vintageadbrowser.com/computers-and-software-ads
No kidding. Maybe even do the growing trend among tech companies in the central California region to fire all employees, offer no relocation, and re-open shop in the Portland, Oregon area. Oregonians need jobs more than California needs anything.
Help us build a better map!
Maybe you'd even be able to purchase an iPod instead of getting people to sign up for a pyramid scheme so you can get one.
Not a Twitter sockpuppet... but I wish I was.
As my ex-boss once said: ...
Being rich does not make you happy, but it is easier to cry in a Rolls-Royce
On the contrary... Oh, how I wish I used to work for Google!
For someone who's "working" 80 hours a week, you sure seem to have a lot of free to be reading & posting on slashdot...
Now they are mostly in their late twens wondering what to do with their existence for the rest of their time
Dude! Two chicks at the same time!