What Your Choice of Linux Distro Says about You

iter8 writes "NewsForge has an article explaining what your choice of distro says about you. There's no comment on what using Windows or OS X does for your rep. I use Mandrake, so that makes me suave and sophisticated."

Comments

Slackware?

[slavemowgli]

No mention of Slackware? What a pity.

Re:Slackware?

[slavemowgli]

Actually, slackware isn't the oldest distro. That credit is generally given to SLS, which appeared in mid-1992; however, there also was MCC Interim Linux (available from the university of Manchester in feb 1992), and TAMU, from the Texas A&M university (about the same time).

Re:Slackware?

[dildo]

I don't use a distro. I do everything myself. I even make my own shoes. I am a bad ass.

My first computer was a mancala, and I was so bad ass that I programmed my own version of doom using nothing but red pebbles -- and after that I wrote a C++ compiler for an analog pinball machine (you think that compiling all that crap for gentoo is a pain in the ass for your pentium 200? this thing had to do like, 6-multiball play for three months straight before KDE was finished, but now I just use it to run TCPdump on the cluster of pinball machines I've got in my house).

I'm still trying to get X-windows running on my toaster, but the video card is REALLY obscure so I may have to write the driver myself. For security, I'm using 4096-bit ssl connection between the plug and the wall, and I'm taking notes from OpenBSD by encrypting the crumbs at the bottom so some script kiddie from Finland doesn't know what kind of bread I've been eating.

I'm moving forward to cyborg stuff -- I'm going to start small by getting LOGO installed on a baby tortoise, but I need to find a good wireless protocol (WEP = weak encryption protocol. ha!) to send commands to it. I don't want the NSA to know what goes on between me and my tortoise.

Don't believe everything you read.

[Rahga]

"I use Mandrake, so that makes me suave and sophisticated."

In other news, Bud Light gets you lots of chicks. In bikinis. And twins.

Oh, well... It's a Saturday.

Re:Don't believe everything you read.

[Daniel Dvorkin]

I was gonna say. Sure, if John Wayne had played a Linux user in a movie ("Well, now ... pilgrim ... looks like your kernel needs a recompilin'") he'd have played a Gentoo user. In real life, Mr. Marion Morrison wouldn't even have touched Linux; he'd have been Windows all the way.

It works...?

[DogDude]

What if I use the distro that I use because it's the only one that I could get to actually work?

Re:It works...?

[nomadic]

What if I use the distro that I use because it's the only one that I could get to actually work?

Then you must enter an intense period of training to hone your installation skills. Go out now and get a copy of NetBSD and begin. After you can install that, you can return to Linux in triumph, for you will be able to install anything.

They forgot Caldera

[antifoidulus]

Using Caldera says that if your linux install fails, sue someone.

Uhm..

[Xeo 024]

Oh please, this is just as reliable as the Which OS Are you? quiz.

Great. No Slackware.

[Xpilot]

So I'll just make one up:

Slackware users are grumpy, bearded old Unix sysadmins who prefer things be done the "good old fashioned way", making their Linux distro stick to traditional Unix principles, through 10 feet of snow, uphill, both ways!

P.S. I'm a slackware user myself, don't flame me ;) It was tongue-in-cheek.

Does Fedora count?

[Sensible Clod]

I don't see any mention of Fedora. Do they expect everyone to believe it's the same as Red Hat's commercial distro?

More likely, we Fedora users are just too good for words.

Re:Does Fedora count?

[NTmatter]

Full-time emplyment works quite well with gentoo, actually. When you wake up, you start compiling the results of last night's 'emerge sync' and then by the time you get home your compile should be finished and you'll sink a few minutes updating your config files. When the weekend rolls around, you'll finally have the time to use your freshly compiled system. Bonus points if you use your lunch break to check up on the status of your compile.

Suse users like a *clean* desktop?

[KublaiKhan]

Obviously, theyv'e never seen mine...the only reason that the icons even line up is because the automatic line up feature's enabled. As for my non-computer desktop....it's been declared a Superfund site, and the EPA guys will be along any time now with the hazmat suits.

I guess I'm using the wrong distro, huh?

Not a pity...

[SaDan]

Slackware users don't need to be compared to the rest of that trash!

Oops... Did I say that out loud? ;-)

No need for that

[CaptainZapp]

Knoppix users are pushy and aggressive. It's not at all unusual for them to hand you a CD and tell you to boot from it.

What a cincidence and a true story.

One of the broad minded Windows admins in [insert major logistics company] yelled at me "Linux for President" when I passed his office before yesterday.

It turns out that one of his laptops was fuxored and no matter what he wasn't able to boot it under Windows.

Since he is broadminded and a good admin (even though he's an MCSE) he has his tools ready and one of it is Knoppix.

The laptop booted like a charm, made the partition visible, the files where saved to another laptop and Linux oughta be president.

There was really no need to push Knoppix on him.

Got Slackware Right Here

[Jameth]

Since they didn't cover Slackware, here you go:

Slackware users are paradoxically obsessed with being cutting edge and traditional at the same time. They love to point out that their distro has all the latest programs, but explain that it's ancient installer is 'still up to the task' and that the lack of powerful package management 'leaves them in control'. Slackware users like to do things for themselves and tend to ignore what popular opinion (and logic and reason and all rational thought) says is good.

And, since they didn't include Fedora either, here's that one:

Fedora is synonymous with Red Hat, but many of its users believe that it isn't. The song of the king of the Linux street, Fedora is popular with those who want to be in the middle of the road, but leading the crowd. Unfortunately, they are actually be pushed along from behind, with the silly-hat men leading from behind. Fedora is very loyal to its customers, except when they want something that Red Hat doesn't, in which case they consider the feature risky.

Not informative, not funny, whee...

[sultanoslack]

Uhm, this isn't really news and isn't even really decent humor.

If you want something informative, there's the old reliable Distro Watch and if you want something funny, try:

• Funroll Loops
• Fedora fun
• [add your link here]

Debian comments are a touch off

[debrain]

The people I know who use Debian, myself included, have less patience for crap that doesn't work. Though harder to install, unlike the other distros, you only ever have to do it once.

Tongue in cheek or no, the myth that Debian is behind other distros has continually been dispelled. Debian/Unstable is consistently ahead of other distros. What other distros besides Debian, and maybe Gentoo, currently include Kernel 2.6.8, KDE 3.3.0, and Firefox RC1?

Debian users simply loathe frigging around with the basics of their system, an experience all too common with some other distros. We prefer to spend our time frigging around on Slashdot, et al. Or advocating free software.

What Your Choice of BSD Distro Says about You

[HenryKoren]

OpenBSD - You are a paranoid schizophrenic and you think everyone is out to get you. You consider your pores security holes

NetBSD - You take solace in the fact your operating system can run on playstation2 and dreamcast and is thus superior.

m0n0wall - You are the Calista Flockhart of the BSD world. You like to keep your base at six megabytes because anything more would be bloated.

Dragonfly BSD - You are a rebel without a clue. You are against the status quo establishment and all the conformist sheep that follow it. Anybody who questions your judgment can go fork themselves.

FreeBSD-CURRENT - You are a crusader, living on the bleeding edge of the Open Source revolution. You build worlds, merge masters, and slay kernel panic modes with nothing more than an UPDATAING file to defend you.

FreeBSD-STABLE - You are a corporate whore... caring more about production, stability, and uptime than any reasonable person. Your if it ain't broke don't fix it mentality makes OS developers ponder the true purpose and meaning of their life quests.

What your choice REALLY means...

[bwoodring]

• Mandrake: You're a nerd
• Red Hat: You're a nerd
• Suse: You're a nerd
• Debian: You're a nerd
• Slackware: You're a nerd
• Knoppix: You're a nerd
• Gentoo: You're a nerd

BONUS!!!!

• FreeBSD: You're a nerd
• OpenBSD: You're a nerd
• Solaris: You're a nerd

Long live the Gentoo empire!

[fireboy1919]

To accept binaries is dishonorable.
He whose distro is not compiled from source will never enter the halls of Stovakor.

Any ko'tal who cannot compile his apps to brings dishonor upon his family, and is a weak piece of baktag.

We do not allow the weak to live.

Accuracy in Reporting!

[Anonymous Coward]

Slackware: You have an old-school stick up your arse. Doesn't that chafe?

Debian: You are like Ayn Rand: you insist that everything in your system be internally consistent, at the expense of nobody else being able to understand you.

Red Hat: You want to be Microsoft, except without the jackboots and the viruses. Well ... maybe the jackboots.

SuSE: You remember how fascist and self-righteous the Novell administrator for your high school was? Surprise -- that's you!

Knoppix: You're good at getting Windows users to try Linux. But hey -- they're Windows users.

Mepis: You sound like a child talking about urinating.

Fedora: You eat Nike cheeseburgers and wear McDonald's sneakers, to show that you are not a corporate whore.

Linspire: You are root. All the time. Isn't that k3wl? Here, have a virus!