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Laptops May Be Hazardous to Your Fertility
Spy der Mann writes "Researchers find that men who place portable computers on their laps are inadvertently raising the temperature of their scrotums -- and possibly damaging their sperm. Guess laptops should get a namechange soon... before our fertility does."
We're slashdotters after all. The only way to get sex is either paying for it or we take matters into our own hands. In either case fertility doesn't matter.
Ahhh...the great dumpster continuum. Many a free computer will be found there. -- sowth (748135)
I like having a good ball-warmer on those cold winter nights. It's just not usually my computer.
Is it just my observation, or are there way too many stupid people in the world?
Too many humans, not enough Laptops!
I think laptops should be distributed free of charge to all male participants in day-time talk shows, reality shows, "dating" shows, and all MTV reality based programming.
Trolls: The high-tech version of those morons that scrawl obscenities in public bathrooms.
IIRC, that's the first time the word "scrotum" has appeared in the front-page headlines. Congratulations, Slashdot, on a new milestone!
There's a Mercedes gap too. I want one and can't afford one, but it's not government's job to do anything about it.
With two kids already, I'm done anyway thankyouverymuch.
"I'd like to trade in this 15" powerbook for a 17" please? My urologist says some of my sperm are still alive."
-- There is no sig line, only Zuul.
The new IBM ThinkPad... now with NadShield(TM)!
That's what I first read ... Then I re-read it again and noticed the powerbook along with the 15" :)
Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum videtur
Before some geek wires their nutsack with a liquid cooling system!
Laptops go on sperm killing rampage
I just took a poll of /.ers around me (I am the only one). I am married. That means that in my informal poll, 100% of /.ers are married. Of course, there could be some margin of error with such a small sample size.
"-1 Troll" is the apparently the same as "-1 I disagree with you."
The entire first paragraph of the article is devoted to the notion that boys tend to spread their legs far out for exactly this reason - but notebook computers force a more artificial, closer-together position that's somewhat less conducive to gamete production.
I salute you on obtaining the same result independent of the linked article! Your simultaneous conclusion is on par with Newton and Leibniz! Gauss and Legendre! Napier and Burgi!
Hail the Slashdot warrior.
We recently had heard in the office over one of the Yellow Machine that's made by Anthology Solutions.
Which is a better contraceptive, a Dell or a can of Mountain Dew?
I have a laptop!
He uses a laptop.
Main difference between the BSD license and the GPL license: one is from California and the other is from Massachusetts
So THAT'S what I'm doing wrong!
I ironed my nipple once -- nothing kinky, I was in a hurry trying to get ready for work. It was an amazing experience for several reasons. One, it was a truly profound kind of pain. I've felt things that hurt worse, but this hurt right down to the soles of my feet.
Two, and I am not kidding here, my nipple was really flat for a long time afterwards. My friends used to ask to see it once in a while so they could marvel and mock.
It also led immediately to one of the more frustrating experiences of my life. I had just burned myself. Like a good little scout, I immediately tried to run cold water on it. I ran over to the sink, turned on the water, and stood there stupidly, thinking, "How the hell am I going to get my nipple under that faucet!" At that point, my wife, who had heard me yelling and cursing, asked what was wrong, and I told her I had burned myself. She called in helpfully, "Run it under cold water."
She really didn't deserve being cursed out like that. I don't know what the experience did to my fertility, but I know what it did to my ability to mate.
Behold the riant ape! Beware, his crooked thumbs!
Frog
Beats the hell out of smashing your balls with a hammer for 10 minutes... really, I mean it, it is much less painfull, don't believe me? Try it
You can't handle the truth.
So you're the one that irons with their clothes still on their body. Now the warning labels makes sense.
01101001 01100001 01101101 01101110 01101111 01110100 01100001 01101100 01100001 01110111 01111001 01100101 01110010
You might want to be a little more specific in that recommendation. Men who still want to become fathers should probably avoid it. Men whose female partners are post-menopausal, who are chronically celebate, or who are exclusively homosexual might not want to bother, no matter how convenient and affordable. And it's definitely not for women.
http://alternatives.rzero.com/
Let's not get TESTE over this issue. At first GLANS, this might be a very scary prospect, but there's a VAS DEFERENS between damage and infertility. I believe the Finnish andrologist, Dr. Skro Tümm, did the SEMINAL work on this area of study.
I'm sorry. I couldn't help myself.
(reminds me of a New Yorker cartoon when Satan tells his associates, "Put the punster in with the mime...")
I might know what I'm talkin' about, but then again, this is Slashdot...
Try getting out into the world once in a while.
Why would I want to do that? I'm a nerd, after all.
I might have to speak to somebody if I went outside.
Sex does seem like a nice idea, but I don't think it's really worth the effort of having a social life.
As the father of 4, this is the best news I've heard all season. I'll be sticking my laptop down my pants every night now until my wife hits menopause. This is like a poor mans Vasectomy. Great Stuff. Thanks Slashdot!!
That is why I have now placed my tin foil hat on my other head :)
So you iron in the nude? That's just as dangerous...
Guess laptops should get a namechange soon.
Somehow I don't think they'll be able to slip "Dell Infertilator D360" or "Compaq Scrotumheater 5100" past the marketing people.
I'm banging a fat chick at the moment and I love it.
Not anymore you're not.
I'm not Catholic, and I'm not up on their rules, but isn't anything that prevents or inhibits those little spermies from reaching the egg Frowned Upon by the Catholic church as "birth control"? Wouldn't a Pentium-powered testacle-toaster qualify?
The Russians have won. They have made the world a cesspool of distrust, greed, fear and hate.
While I seriously wonder why, so many people here spout off meme's without bothering to at least construct them craftily, that it makes me think someone's contructed a robot to fill in slashdot articles with random fluff ala eliza.
.5 second exposure to a very unlikely high of 13mg of tar. Holy shit, the sky is falling.
Anyways, "try going outside" can be responded to with "where?" and easily refuting anything that comes up - concerts are loud, the outdoors are cold, bars are stale and have a shitty booze selection and slobbering drunk people - none of this has to be grounded in reality, but personally i'm sick of people that think their way is the only way. I swear I'm going to shoot the next person that gets mad at me when I smoke a cigarette, outside, and even step away when they walk directly in my path only to complain about the smell and "hazardous effects" of the
You can apply this argument to just about anything these days - the election, windows, mac, linux, air speed velocity of an unladed (european) swallow, etc. People are so polarized and mired in zealotry it makes me sick - either they have religion and need more, or they don't have religion and need some. Get over it. Some of us are trying to actually think our way through life and are sick of you idiots fucking it up.
All I know is, the Catholic church is going to start banning Powerbooks.
Take off every sig. For great justice.
wow, you created an account just to send me a message? Thanks!
Now get back to sucking my dick, woman.
#!/
Our problem is that the smart and educated people aren't having enough children.
No No No, you have it all wrong. The problem is, smart and educated people aren't eating enough poor, dumb babies.
HA! I just wasted some of your bandwidth with a frivolous sig!