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In Need of Repatriation Advice?
kir asks: "I've been living in Japan for the last 10 years -- 6 in the USAF, 4 in 'freedom'. My wife and I recently decided to move to the U.S. (back for me, not for her). I am wondering what advice the vocal Slashdot minority might give me. I'm most interested in tips on finding a job from here and gauging a proposed salary based on a location of which I know nothing. I'd also find helpful tips on preparing for culture shock (both my mild case and my wife's possibly severe one). Thanks!"
I've been in a similar situation as you (although I was only there for 8 months). I would recommend moving someplace with a sizable Japanese community. This would help ease the urges for Japanese books, food, and other media. Being prepared for a trip or two back (at least for her) would be a good idea too. You're going to want to make sure she knows as much English as possible before you go (including slang) - that'll help with the shock. Culture shock is going to suck sometimes. The best way to deal with it is to be very supportive and make sure you have a good foundation in your relationship for problems. Be prepared for your wife to be angry or upset with you as a sympom of it. The first month won't be so bad, but the next 6 months to a year are going to be very trying on both of you. Good luck.
you're going to leave _japan_ to come _here?! my advice would be to rethink the whole idea.
I'd encourage you to try to get something in a big city, something on the West Coast, or in Hawaii, which has a big Japanese community.
I have a friend who married a woman from Estonia (they met in the Peace Corps) and brought her back to Nebraska. She signed up for the local university.
It was very hard on her, and she ended up dropping out. There were a fair number of foreign students at the university, but it's pretty provincial here, and she had a hard time blending in and making friends. She was very unhappy.
I've had friends in Chicago who fared better -- there are quite a few people from other countries living in Chicago. Even if they're not from the same place you are, you can still compare notes as immigrants. I knew some Russian people in Chicago, and a girl from Viet Nam who got along better.
One friend, married to a Russian woman, moved from Chicago to Brooklyn, and I think she's a lot happier there. She can go to Russian neighborhoods (even though they don't live in one), speak her native language, buy Russian food, etc. It helps.
Having said all of that, I used to know a Japanese woman who was here in Nebraska doing graduate work at the University, and she seemed to like it a lot. So it can be done.
But she had a clique of grad student immigrant friends -- a woman from Bangledesh, and another woman from South Korea -- and she was here studying Native American culture, so professionally it was a great place for her.
I don't want to say something sexist, but I think it's harder for women to make these moves sometimes -- they tend to be more plugged into groups of friends, more social. It's harder if you're following someone else, too, and not doing it for your own reasons.
I'd adivse you to try to give her as much support as possible -- shoot for a community where she can fit in. Don't move to Utah, even if you get the best offer there.
preparing for culture shock (both my mild case and my wife's possibly severe one).
I wouldn't be so sure about who will experience the biggest shock. When you go somewhere new, you are mentally preparing yourself for this shock, but potentially the biggest shock of all comes when you go back.
At least in my case that was a big eye-opener.
Anecdotal, I know, but it wasn't something I expected.
And since you have been gone for 6 years, many things will have changed. Since change is slow and always present, it only becomes clear after watching something with a long time in between snapshots.
Because some people might actually love their country, and want to make it a place they can be proud of.
Back during the election cycle my wife showed me an interesting article about, "loving your country." A little child loves his/her mommy and daddy, and won't consider that mommy and daddy might actually be doing something wrong, or that they might need to change their ways. A mother and father love their child/children, realize they're not perfect, and that they need nurturing, love, praise, and discipline/correction as part of their process of growing up.
The living have better things to do than to continue hating the dead.
"Love it or Leave it" is one of the most retarded and unhelpful (not to mention inappropriate) responses to criticisms of the US. My friends and family all live in the US. I want good things for them and for the US. Sure, there are much better places to live, but what I have, in terms of both stuff and people, is all here.
By quoting statistics and data that show the US is failing to achieve, people are hoping to spread awareness and interest in the hopes that people can and will work hard to change the US.
The US now is a superpower with nowhere to go but down, and we will fall, and continue to fall, unless we take the bold steps necessary to change our ways. Only through criticism and willingess to force change will we ever become the nation we think we are instead of the nation we really are.
Look really close. There are too many variables that you have not accounted for in those "facts". Go read "How to lie with Statistics" sometime.
Many of those differences are within the statistical noise.
Others are accounted for by different ways of counting, remember many of these numbers come from the governments who have an advantage if they skew numbers. For example some countries do not count children under 2 in their child mortality rate counts.
Few countries have populations as large as the US, a uniform population with far less outriggers bringing everyone down. Drop Mississippi from the US, and our math standing goes way up. How would Europe fare if they were not only all averaged together, but Yugoslavia was added in. (I'm not sure if you would count Yugoslavia as part of Europe, but that should help you understand)
Are those tests of anything useful? You can do much better than me on a test to define a lot of math terms, but if that test doesn't include using the math to do proofs, or otherwise figure, it is meaningless.
I leave the exercise of Swiftian irony in completing these thoughts to you, the reader.
"Flyin' in just a sweet place,
Never been known to fail..."
Slashdot is not the place to waste the time of the readers of this site with answering one persons personal question. That persons question should have been sent to a newsgroup or something and not broadcast to everyone. Its just a waste of time for the countless people who cannot relate to that persons problem.
It appears as if you may have missed the entire point of the AskSlashdot section.
Andy Grove is quoted as saying: "Every generation thinks that they invented sex"
Vocal democrats and "progressives" are echoing the same crap as they did in 1960 or 1930 or 1900. US society is full of inequities, injustices and plain stupidity, but those are things that come with all human societies.
If you think that the Netherlands, UK, Australia, Switzerland, Japan or whatever place you consider perfect are utopian societies, you are aptly demonstrating that you ARE the ignorant american that you dislike so much.
While you and your friends are screaming about Bush or the collapse of american society, you miss the benefits you take advantage of as an american.
You fail to mention your Federally-guaranteed student loans and cheap mortgages. You don't bitch about the highways that whisk you to your suburban home or the miracle drugs discovered thanks to government research.
I hate small-minded people. Particularly those who have nothing to do other than criticize and nothing to contribute over hot air. Right-wing, left-wing, a vapid windbag is a vapid windbag.
Conformity is the jailer of freedom and enemy of growth. -JFK