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Download Your Brain
Nicholas Roussos writes "Futurologist Dr. Ian Pearson predicts that death will be avoidable in the year 2050 by downloading your brain to a computer. Unfortunately, he is also predicting that the process will be only available to the wealthy for years after its release. I guess we should all start saving our pennies now."
...to the blue screen of death.
The simple truth is that interstellar distances will not fit into the human imagination
- Douglas Adams
Oh yay, so Bill Gates gets to be immortal as well as evil.
"What are we going to do this millenium, Bill?"
"Same as we do every millenium, Ballmer..."
Search in eMule for the brain of the guy that screwed Jennifer Lopez or something.
www.lemonodor.com A mostly Lisp weblog
...they forgot the -p flag when dumping it, and people will be restored with no moral codes.
Quite. The only benefit might be that you can have arguments with yourself before you die, which would be quite cool.
This is just for the vainglorious.
You'd be suprised. When I died a few years ago I had this done, and it's been great fun. It was either this or getting frozen. I'm just waiting for someone to screw up and download me, and I'm home free. That's where the money will be. Allowing the rich people to take over a younger person's body.
This sig has been removed pending an investigation.
What are you talking about? Riker did it on Star Trek the Next Generation with the transporter. What happens is one of the personalities becomes a member of the maqui, and the other becomes a first officer. duh
I always wanted to buy the mailing list and phone numbers of people who subscribe to those New Age/Psychic magazines. Then I would call them out of the blue and say, "I'm a psychic and I sensed that you needed to speak to me!" Then get them hooked and charge them $$. Now with the DNC list, there's no point.
Until computers can smoke joints and get a buzz, drink beer and get a buzz, and have orgasms, I won't consider it "living".
In other news, a new "smart bomb" that kills the very rich without harming the poor has been discovered... they call it an EMP.
-1 Uncomfortable Truth
If I go into a teleporter, do 'I' come out the other end?
Well, until someone invents a person-capable teleportation device, i think the answer is No.
#!/usr/bin/english
"I haven't lost my mind; I'm sure it's backed up on tape somewhere."
"Prepare for the worst - hope for the best."
Apparently he's been watching the Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex series on Adult Swim.
In addition to the brain-puter, he has predicted that the future will also have power-hungry bending robots with a penchant for booze, smoking and thievery.
And what happens if the Evil Bit gets flipped in the download?
Good? Bad? I'm the guy with the gun.
More
since when can one make up a title for themselves in a made up profession and start posting made up studies to a reputable news site?
Exactly which website would that be?
But you'd be programmed to not notice that your brain was replaced with a shell script. All it would need to do was "frist psot" and "in Soviet Russia" jokes!
the preceding comment is my own and in no way reflects the opinion of the Joint Chiefs of Staff
Just don't become a Mathologist, because 50 - 5 = 45, not 75.
what sig?
"It would be most interesting to impress your memory engrams on a computer, doctor. The resulting torrential flood of illogic would be most entertaining."
--Spock, to Dr. McCoy, in "The Ultimate Computer"
"I wanna have a pet GWB!"
IIRC, Dick Cheney has one of those right now. Oh, wait...
Bill Clinton: Pimp we can believe in. - The Shirt!!!
The photocopy would be immortal so it could spend the rest of eternity to figure out time travel and then go back in to when my original was still alive and then prevent me from... ...oh wait this is about a copy of me?
Well... Then I hope he chokes on those dorritos and dies of exhaustion of playing to much EQ XXIV instead of setting the time aside to revive me!
"I am the king of the Romans, and am superior to rules of grammar!"
-Sigismund, Holy Roman Emperor (1368-1437)
I'd like to think I'm more than just the information patterns in my brain.
Me too. Fucking science is always screwing with my delusions!!!
OK, it was funnier in my head.. er I mean brain.. er I mean consciousness... er I mean soul. Screw it, you get the point.
"reality has a well-known liberal bias" - Steven Colbert
Attempt 7: Teleportation
Teleportation, in this case, would be the difficult technique of transporting a Convict to the Americas by disintegrating him here and reintegrating him there. With great expense, we constructed a teleportation device and stuck a Convict inside.
Result: Convict did not so much "Disintegrate" as "Melt."
From Reaching the Americas: One Mad Scientist's Approach by Jeff Vogel
But then again, I could be wrong.
hey, it's 50% effective.
i say slap a beta label on it and release it to sourceforge. some kind soul will iron out the remaining bugs.
#!/usr/bin/english
Toaster: Would you like some toast?
...
...
Lister: Mm-mm.
Toaster: Some nice hot crisp brown buttered toast?
Lister: Mm-mm.
Toaster: You don't want any toast then?
Lister: No.
Toaster: What about a muffin?
Lister: Nothing.
Toaster: You know the last time you had toast? 18 days ago. 11:36,
Tuesday the 3rd. Two rounds.
Lister: Ssshhh!
Toaster: I mean, what's the point of buying a toaster with artificial intelligence if you don't like toast?
Lister: I do like toast!
Toaster: I mean, this is my job! This is cruel, just cruel.
Lister: Look, I'm busy.
Toaster: Oh, you're not busy eating toast, are you?
Lister: I don't want any!
Toaster: I mean, the whole purpose of my existence is to serve you with hot, buttered, scrummy toast. If you don't want any, then my existence is meaningless.
Lister: Good.
Toaster: I toast, therefore I am.
Lister: Will you shut up?
[He goes back to sniffing his way through the book. Rimmer enters.]
Lister: Rimmer, there's nothing out there, you know. There's nobody out there. No alien monsters, no Zargon warships, no beautiful blondes with beehive hairdos who say `Show me some more of this Earth thing called kissing'. There's just you, me, the cat, and a lot of floating smegging
rocks. That's it. Finito.
Rimmer: Lister, if there's no one out there, what's the point in existence? Why are we here?
Toaster: Beats me. Do you want some toast?
-------- This space intentionally left blank --------
Yes.
The Tao of math: The numbers you can count are not the real numbers.
Why would there be money in "young bodies"? Bio-bodies aren't exactly scarce; these days anybody can use their computer to choose an bodytype of any age from fastsimulation-grown vDNA, merge a selected brainpattern (your own backup, or JennaJamesonLITE(TM)) with an old bulky meatbrain or a more robust substrate, then output that from a your garden variety large-nanoassembler.
Maybe you're from some alternate universe where an evil power elite kept abundance scarce in order to preserve the hiearchical social order?
Power to the Peaceful
And label yourself "stephen_hawking.torrent".
Become one with the machine. Be the machine. But in this case, machine becomes you instead...
I think that only happens in Soviet Russia...
Code, Hardware, stuff like that.
Dear god I had them put me out to be reanimated just so I wouldn't have to live through it. I realize 30,000 years sounds like a long time to you mortals, But it's longer than that, When all you see is the inside of the same ship talking to the same people, you get REALLY REALLY bored. Think sitting in the Doctor's waiting room while they loop "Row Row Row your Boat" and they only have one copy of Highlights.
And no sooner do I get here, and you people have puked the place up so bad I'm ready to do it again. And that should tell you something.
"Learning is not compulsory... neither is survival."
--Dr.W.Edwards Deming
..will I run linux? Can I run a beowulf cluster of me?
Progressivism (aka US 'Liberalism'): Ideas so good they need a police/surveillance-state to enforce.
You don't have to wait 50 years to do it.
...
just get yourslves some nice mental disease and you'll be able to argue with several copies of yourself
-- Technology for the sake of technology is as pathetic as eschewing technology because it's technology.
"as a disembodied head living in a jar, I envy the dead."
-George Foreman's Head
> Unless you find even your own cloned brain hates you as well.
That would be uncool. Imagine him revealing embarassing truths, like "Hey! LiquidCool once while looking at a video of a sow suckling its piglets!"
(-1: Post disagrees with my already-settled worldview) is not a valid mod option.
It would be funny if they discovered the appendix in fact housed the soul. "And all this time we thought it was relatively useless!"
Brandon Reinhart
Trust me -- this is a road you don't want to go down. Your wife will die in childbirth, your children will be hidden from you, and the guy who used to be your best friend in the world will hack your limbs off. And then, just to rub salt in the wound, he'll tell your son that you're "more machine than man now, twisted and evil." What a prick.