Spielberg & Lucas Approve Indy 4 Script

Anonymous Coward writes "According to an article on ComingSoon.net, the script for the fourth Indiana Jones movie is moving forward. Lucas and Spielberg have agreed on the writing, with only Harrison Ford still required to sign off on the project before it can go into pre-production. Ford has yet to read the script."

Comments

What could possibly go wrong?

[gumpish]

From the directors who brought you A.I. and The Phantom Menace...

Re:What could possibly go wrong?

[martin-boundary]

Hah! Your reverse psychology won't work on me! I just got mod points right now, and right after I post this reply you're going down baby... Huh? where's my mod points? D'oh!

Re:What could possibly go wrong?

[Brad1138]

"Howard the Duck"
enough said

Re:What could possibly go wrong?

[wankledot]

That's the beauty of the extra-long ending, it doesn't matter what they are! It's so vague and pointless, you can make anything you want up and it will fit.

I agree, stop with the stupid fucking Spielberg everyone's-happy ending. Not every movie needs 5 endings to show how everything worked out nicely. I was so pissed off that the movie didn't end right when he fell into the water, I seriously wish I had walked out right then and never had to endure the "real" ending.

Re:What could possibly go wrong?

[Seumas]

You guys are all a buncha dicks. Now you're got me off digging through my huge DVD collection trying to find my copy of AI so I can watch it again and see if I feel different about it the second time.

I hate you assholes. I'm goin' home.

Re:What could possibly go wrong?

[some guy I know]

What could possibly go wrong?

• Indiana will get a new sidekick named "Jar-Jar".
• When he wants to seduce his leading lady, Indiana will start talking about sand.
  He will also find out that the leading lady is his long-lost fraternal twin sister, which will be kind of a downer.
  Fortunately, he will discover this before he succeeds in his seduction attempts, so that nothing too naughty happens.
• Prior to the release of the fourth movie, the first three movies will be re-released with special effects and scenes that weren't there when the movies were originally released.
• The fourth movie will try to tie up all the loose ends in the other movies, with the result that there will be very little action, but plenty of boring discussion.
• Sean Connery's character will turn to the dark side (Naziism).
  However, in the climactic scene where he tells Indiana, "Indie, I am your father, Indiana will say, "Well, yeah, I know.", so it won't have quite the same punch.

Re:What could possibly go wrong?

[Afrosheen]

I think it'd be cool if they had a contest to design alternate endings for the film. Possibly from different directors as well.

Bruckheimer ending: Robot boy goes to the bottom of the ocean, the fairy ends up being a Navy SEAL team, and he takes a rocket in the face, KABOOM!

Woody Allen ending: Robot boy goes to the bottom of the ocean where he recites 15 minutes of neurotic dialog while the audience walks out. The New York audience stays for the duration and stages a parade after the film is over.

Kubrick ending: Robot boy goes to the bottom of the ocean where he ends up deactivating himself after realizing the fairy story was bullshit.

Disney ending: yada yada boy actually meets the fairy who is a hologram projection from Robocorp. The fairy instructs him to return to the lab where a cloned human body awaits. His memory is transferred into the clone and he's reunited with the family, happily ever after etc.

Lucas ending: boy meets fairy, fairy turns out to be his father. Epic battle commences, father sacrifices himself to save the boy at the hands of the Overlordbot. Robot boy loses a hand in the battle, replaces it with a human hand. To be continued.

Is this...

[Anonymous Coward]

Is this the fabled indiana jones/star wars crossover, where indy is revealed to be han solo?

I hope so!

Re:Is this...

[Finuvir]

At first I thought you were joking but then I did a bit of research and it turns out that you're not far from the truth! Apparently both characters were played by the same actor! Some guy named Harrison Ford. I wonder if he's been in anything else good?

Pretty cool piece of trivia for you movie buffs, huh? Your friends will never believe you when you tell them.

How 'bout

[Himring]

Evil SS Nazi: "So, Dr Jones, boxes or briefs?..."

Jones: "Depends...."

Re:How 'bout

[astromog]

Evil SS Nazi: "So, Dr Jones, boxes or briefs?..."

I prefer crates, myself.

All I want to know is...

[myowntrueself]

will Angelina Jolie be in it, starring as Lara Croft?

Re:The best of the series, I predict

[Hawkxor]

Jim Carrey, you say?

You are a bad man. You are a very bad man.

in part 4,

[SQLz]

...Indiana Jones never whips first. He dodges laser beams then whips the blaster pistol from their hand....oh wait.

Re:The best of the series, I predict

[AndroidCat]

Adam Sandler.

Checklist for Harrison.

[Poietes]

Harrison better make sure it has all the essentials. It's not good to mess with the formula that geeks have come to know and love:

• Snakes, and Indy saying how much he hates them.
• Guns, and Indy saying how much he hates them.
• Nazis.
• A big nasty strong guy whom Indy defeats with cunning rather than brawn.
• A scrawny little guy with pince-nez glasses and a thick accent.
• An artifact of supernatural powers.
• A scene in which the terrible power of the artifact is realised.
• Hat and bullwhip.
• Sassy love interest.
• John Rhys-Davies in a red fez.
• Denholm Elliot stuttering his way through his lines.
• One or more booby traps.

That second to last one could prove to be quite difficult.

Re:Checklist for Harrison.

[rhiorg]

Let's mix it up a bit and see if we can get a John Waters film out of some of the same ingredients...

* A big nasty strong Nazi snake with pince-nez glasses and a thick accent.
* A scrawny little guy with supernatural boobies.
* Sassy love interest played by John Rhys-Davies in a red fez, who unleashes the terrible power of the bullwhip on Denholm Elliot.

Re:Indiana Jones And The Search For Actor Approval

[Engineer Andy]

pity GL didn't make such a pact for episode 1 and 2.

I can see it now

[skingers6894]

A pistol holster and clip for his whip on either side of the walking-frame...

Re:Indiana Jones And The Search For Actor Approval

[Seumas]

Dude - he's Harrison Ford. He's Indiana Fucking Jones. He's Han Frigging Solo. He's at a point in his career where he can probably have a binding contract rider to have both directors shave their nuts and glue the pubes to their upper lip and do a little Adolph dance, if he wants to.

Hell, he's doing three movies in 2006 and he's still the top of the A-lists.

Harrison Ford has made more good movies than both of those directors combined.

Re:The best of the series, I predict

[Monkelectric]

A scrawl of blocky pixels played Indy well in the LucasArts games

I met him when he appeared on Inside the Actors Studio, nice guy.

Re:The best of the series, I predict

[NanoGator]

John Goodman playing Indy after letting himself go...

Potential Titles they are kicking around

[lobsterGun]

Indiana Jones and the Magical Walker.

Indiana Jones: Raiders of the Lost Viagra

Indiana Jones and the Grandchildren that never call.

Indiana Jones: Barely Alive

Indiana Jones: The Exploitation Sequel

Re:Where are you Kenner?

[Dancin_Santa]

In the re-released version, Lucas has the scimitar guy shooting first.

Re:The best of the series, I predict

[Anonymous Coward]

So Indy and his brother go on a killing spree in Nazi Berlin and kill Hitler after quoting from the Grail Diary?

Re:No, but a R rated version would be cool

[QuantumG]

I just need sex in a graveyard, an elevator, and an orgy to fill my slut bingo card.

Uhh, so what you're saying is all you've got circled so far is "parent's bedroom"?

Re:No, but a R rated version would be cool

[pboulang]

Indiana Jones and the Nipples Of Doom...

Indiana Jones and the Temple of Poon

Re:Indiana Jones And The Search For Actor Approval

[Anonymous Coward]

And that's ON TOP of four STAR WARS movies

The Star Wars holiday special doesn't count...

Re:OT: A.I. is a Great Movie

[kevcol]

Hey! I got one of those machines with feeling too!

Hey!

[Black Parrot]

> Harrison better make sure it has all the essentials. It's not good to mess with the formula that geeks have come to know and love:

* Snakes, and Indy saying how much he hates them.
* Guns, and Indy saying how much he hates them.
* Nazis.
* A big nasty strong guy whom Indy defeats with cunning rather than brawn.
* A scrawny little guy with pince-nez glasses and a thick accent.
* An artifact of supernatural powers.
* A scene in which the terrible power of the artifact is realised.
* Hat and bullwhip.
* Sassy love interest.
* John Rhys-Davies in a red fez.
* Denholm Elliot stuttering his way through his lines.
* One or more booby traps.

Sounds like the details of the script have already leaked out...

Re:pay attention, you faceless bully of snippiness

[complete loony]

Wait, you're posting to slashdot to *avoid* idiotic self-righteous assholes?

Re:Randomly selected dude

[NanoGator]

"Today I am that randomly selected dude and I choose to mod you "-1 Offtopic". I have a bad hair day."

Heh. I once got a flamebait moderation over a comment I made about grilled chicken.

Hello

[zhenga]

I'm selling these fine leather jackets.

Re:one of the best

[damsa]

They should replace Ford like they replaced him on Sum of All Fears. With Affleck. With Kevin Smith directing it, who wouldn't want to see it.

Parallels with Lucas and Smith are a many. Lucas had coming of age comedies, American Graffiti, Smith had Mallrats, both have shameless merchandising tie ins with their movies, and endless rereleases. They both released crappy prequels, Phantom Menance and Mallrats, prequel to Clerks. Lucas has R2D2 and 3CPO. Smith has Silent Bob and Jay. Lucas has Hair, Smith has Hair,

I think I proved my case. I think we should do an online petition to have the next Indy be made by Kevin Smith.

Don't do it, George!!!

[inkswamp]

Dear Mr. Lucas,

Please don't make another Indy movie. You see, no matter how well executed it is, no matter how well-conceived it is, no matter how grandiose your overall plans are, the fans will inevitably nitpick it to death and ruin it for the young generation (and the young at heart) your films are generally meant for. I'm afraid my generation, despite growing up with your magical films, has become whiny and pathetic and we bitch and moan when you don't do thing 100% exactly like we expect. We want you to be just like the McDonalds we also grew up with. Make the next Indy film the most perfect Big Mac with Large Fries or we'll scream and shout that you've raped our childhood and that you suck beyond all comprehension.

Quite frankly, I love your films, but I don't know if I can handle another heaping, steaming pile of "fan" reaction yet again.

Thanks for hearing me out.

Re:Not too old!

[robfoo]

I wonder how many people went into history or archeology because of the Indy movies?

Four

Ford and the script

[Theatetus]

Ford has yet to read the script.

Dag, what's taking him so long? The script's been on Gnutella for weeks!

Brief excerpt from the script:

[artemis67]

Hilter: Join me, Indy! Come over to the Nazi side!
Indy: No!
Hitler: Please?
Indy: OK! Do you have any children you want me to kill?