Death Star Subwoofer

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Posted by CmdrTaco on Tuesday July 19, 2005 @03:35AM from the because-you-can dept.

bmfs writes "A subwoofer so powerful it could loosen fillings, shake out the cholesterol from arteries and generally make a lot of noise. It seems that the Death Star, ignoring the weakness that ultimately lead to its complete destruction, was a pretty good design... so someone made his own (with a lot of help from a housemate). The Death Star Subwoofer is currently up for sale on Ebay."

33 of 357 comments (clear)

So... I see your Bass is as big as mine... by losman · 2005-07-19 03:36 · Score: 5, Funny

Let's see how you handle it...

--
Q: I am short, useless and provide no value. What am I? A: a sig
1. Re:So... I see your Bass is as big as mine... by mzwaterski · 2005-07-19 04:39 · Score: 4, Funny
  
  Isn't this off-topic? Why is the parent talking about fish??
A disturbance in the Force by AtariAmarok · 2005-07-19 03:37 · Score: 5, Funny

"....powerful it could loosen fillings, shake out the cholesterol from arteries and generally make a lot of noise"
Just like George Lucas' legal team!

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Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
death star? by Anonymous Coward · 2005-07-19 03:37 · Score: 5, Funny

looks more like a "deaf" star, yo.

*pauses to pour out a 40 for my fallen homies who have joined the force*
1. Re:death star? by Hogwash+McFly · 2005-07-19 04:00 · Score: 4, Funny
  
  Listening to ebonics is a fate worse than deaf.
  
  --
  Mother, do you think they'll like this sig?
handwaving by justforaday · 2005-07-19 03:39 · Score: 5, Funny

This isn't the bass you are looking for...

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I'll turn into a supernova and burn up everything. Well I'll turn into a black little hole and you'll turn into string.
So... by Tuxedo+Jack · 2005-07-19 03:40 · Score: 5, Funny

Who's going to build the Bass-tille?

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Striking fear in the authors of godawful fanfiction, I am here, appearing in darkness, Tuxedo Jack!
Funniest eBay listing I've seen in a while by Monte · 2005-07-19 03:40 · Score: 5, Funny

The Q&A section alone is worth reading TFA.

Q: Look at the size of that thing!
A: Cut the chatter Red 2.
1. Re:Funniest eBay listing I've seen in a while by DrEldarion · 2005-07-19 03:54 · Score: 4, Funny
  
  Hah, this one is even better:
  
  Q: If your "deathstar" subwooofer had a stand-up fight with a "borg cube" all-in-1 hi-fi then who'd win and how?
  A: The Death Star can destroy a planet. I can't imagine it would struggle against a gramophone with a built in wireless and auto-reverse cassette deck.
2. Re:Funniest eBay listing I've seen in a while by silicon+not+in+the+v · 2005-07-19 05:08 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  When reading those Q&A things, I started thinking up some on my own.
  
  Q: I would like to see if your Death Star subwoofer would go well with the Alliance tweeter I built, but I live in the US, so it's too far away.
  
  A: The US is too remote to make an effective demonstration, but don't worry, we'll deal with your treble friends soon enough.
  
  --
  We may experience some slight turbulence and then...explode. -Capt. Mal Reynolds
Re:Completely off-topic by AtariAmarok · 2005-07-19 03:41 · Score: 4, Funny

"Who dies in the new Harry Potter? Who? Please let me know!"
I think Jar Jar Weasley dies when the Dark Lord Vadermort blows up Hogobah... oh never mind.

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Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
Idiots never learn from history. by Anonymous Coward · 2005-07-19 03:42 · Score: 5, Funny

The subwoofer installed is an Alpine 12" SWS-1242D, rated at 900W peak power, 300W rms. The enclosure is filled with foam wadding and ported. The ports are vented directly out the bottom of the subwoofer. The design was modelled on WinISD to calculate the port lengths... it's proper stuff :) There are two 4mm binding posts at the back for connection to a power amplifier. I'll be adding the amplifier to e-bay as soon as I type out a description, but any amplifier will work.

These suckers have put in yet another thermal exhaust port that would be the prefect fit for a couple of proton torpedoes. Idiots never learn from history. The Bose alliance is going to have a field day with this.
Looks great... unfortunately... by lpangelrob · 2005-07-19 03:43 · Score: 5, Funny

Unfortunately, a lightning bug entered through an exhaust vent at the end of a trench in the subwoofer, resulting in the destruction of the subwoofer.
Reportedly, the force was with it.

--
-Rob
Biblical fiscal responsibility
For those who say by jaysones · 2005-07-19 03:44 · Score: 4, Funny

"I find your lack of bass disturbing."
Re:Even more cool... by Jamu · 2005-07-19 03:44 · Score: 5, Funny

These photos betray enough of the design to build your own fully armed and operational battle station.

Many Bothans died to bring us this information.

Sorry.

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Who ordered that?
Recipe by GauteL · 2005-07-19 03:45 · Score: 5, Funny

1. Make silly Star Wars / Star Trek gadget.
2. Put it up on eBay
3. Notify Slashdot
4. Profit!
1. Re:Recipe by bugnuts · 2005-07-19 03:48 · Score: 5, Funny
  
  I find your lack of ??? disturbing.
2. Re:Recipe by ari_j · 2005-07-19 04:46 · Score: 3, Funny
  
  Re:Recipe (Score:0, Offtopic)
  where are modpoints when I need them!
  
  Evidently, they have fallen into the wrong hands.
No shipping? by ShyGuy91284 · 2005-07-19 03:45 · Score: 3, Funny

He should have thought about it more. Even if the shipping was a hundred or so, I'm sure he could have found people that would be willing to pay much more for it even with shipping since some Star Wars fans can be rather rabid and obsessive... *cough* Time to return to my homemade Star Trek bridge.....

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In undeveloped countries, the consumer controls the market. In capitalist America, the market controls you.
Sadly, Even When Added To Your Sound System.... by BRock97 · 2005-07-19 03:45 · Score: 4, Funny

... it will still be insignificant when compared to the power of the Force.

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Bryan R.
The price of freedom is eternal vigilance, or $12.50 as seen on eBay.....
Re:Obligatory reference... by mbadolato · 2005-07-19 03:46 · Score: 5, Funny

All Your Bass Are Belong To Us!
Re:Completely off-topic by AtariAmarok · 2005-07-19 03:47 · Score: 4, Funny

"Whathisname, the token black kid."
You mean Boromir, right? The guy killed by the Cylons because he entered a stargate during a Wraith attack.

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Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
Re:That's no moon... by FidelCatsro · 2005-07-19 03:51 · Score: 5, Funny

no no no its ,
That's no moon ,Its a Base station

--
The only things certain in war are Propaganda and Death. You can never be sure which is which though
Just let me know by AtariAmarok · 2005-07-19 03:51 · Score: 4, Funny

"All they need now is one I can attach my car stereo to so people can hear me coming from 30 miles away."
Just let us know when you build your Imperial Car Destroyer. Put the plans up here (slashdotting be damned). I bet it would be a real babe magnet.

"Hey, baby! Anyone ever tell you look just like Natalie Portman? Come over here and check out my ride. It's got 385 Tauntauns under the hood. Maybe we can go over to my apartment. I've got hot grits and Death Star loudspeakers. Yeah, baby."

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Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
When's my turn? by AtariAmarok · 2005-07-19 03:59 · Score: 3, Funny

I've got a Weber propane BBQ painted to look like Jabba's barge. If I put it on eBay, can you make it a Slashdot news item tomorrow?

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Don't blame Durga. I voted for Centauri.
I've got a bad feeling about this... by glassgnost · 2005-07-19 04:02 · Score: 3, Funny

all your vibes are belong to us
Re:Even more cool... by dr_dank · 2005-07-19 04:04 · Score: 4, Funny

He won't ship it due to size and weight so you need to be local to Reading, UK to pick it up.

It's a trap!

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Where does the school board find them and why do they keep sending them to ME?
Re:That's not a subwoofer.... by Reverberant · 2005-07-19 04:07 · Score: 3, Funny

I see your folded horn and raise you one flatbed-mounted horn...
Re:Even more cool... by B3ryllium · 2005-07-19 04:12 · Score: 4, Funny

Every time you make that joke, God kills a Bothan.
Re:Yes that's very cool but.... by 3nd32 · 2005-07-19 04:19 · Score: 4, Funny

I AM a beowulf cluster of these things, you insensitive clod!
Can it do the brown note?? by lbmouse · 2005-07-19 04:21 · Score: 3, Funny

I'd bid if it could produce a sound that would make me shit my pants.
Re:I take "Paraphrase This!" for $500 by saderax · 2005-07-19 04:22 · Score: 5, Funny

At least he fixed a couple spelling/grammar errors.

No, that was probably the editors!

BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH....
HAHAHAHahahaha...
ahahahhahah
hehe... heh.
*wipes a tear from his eye*
Re:Chavs by dpilot · 2005-07-19 04:45 · Score: 3, Funny

I've always had this pet idea to get a little ricer, mount the subwoofer on the outside, and have an "engine noise synthesizer" coupled to the gas pedal and perhaps vacuum, as well. Pipe the synthesizer through the sub, and it sounds like you've got an engine the size (and muffler) of a monster truck in a Civic-like car.

But I've got SO many better things to do with my time and money that I'd have to be immortal and already have my own space program, before I'd bother with this.

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The living have better things to do than to continue hating the dead.