Jerk-O-Meter to Meter Jerks

prostoalex writes "The Jerk-o-Meter from MIT will analyze voice patterns of phone conversations and display a relative value of jerkiness factor on the scale of 0 to 100. For now, the Jerk-O-Meter is set up to monitor the user's end of the conversation. If his attention is straying, a message pops up on the phone that warns, 'Don't be a jerk!' or 'Be a little nicer now.' A score closer to 100 percent would prompt, 'Wow, you're a smooth talker.'"

Comments

Calling home

[bigwavejas]

"Hello, Grandma?"
[pause]
[pause]
"Eh? Who's this?"
Jerk-o-Meter: "Don't be a jerk!"
[pause]
Click!

or...

"Hello, Mom?"
"Hi Honey, how've you been... Let me tell you about the potato salad I made yesterday for the picnic, it was absolutely deli.."
Jerk-o-Meter: "Wow, you're a smooth talker."
[pause]
"Smartass!"
Click!

Re:Calling home

[bwintx]

Of course, if the software only evaluates voice patterns, you'll just have to learn to say everything with an extraordinarily nice voice. That is, you can still say "you're an incompetent idiot", you just have to say it in the same tone you would normally use for "you're a really smart person".

Yep. Just like talking to a cat.

Re:Calling home

[tod_miller]

Layman terms:

Both sides of the brain compete to read a word:

You try and 'read' the letters, and 'look at' the word. Which means many times the people see the words as shapes, not information.

When writing, we always look back on what we type, even visually (when assembling words).

The only pertinent parallel I can think of is when a hot chick in a shirt shirt skirt walks into the room, but is showing all her cleavage, and you mind fights itself, as your fovea centralis tries to split and focus all its cones on both her assets.

Dyslexia is like that, and then having a pop quiz if you noted her name on her id badge.

They already have this tech..

[speights_pride!]

..I mean I can just ring these special phone numbers and some nice lady on the end tells me "you're nice","You are big" .. there is also something she says about "jerking" ??

Application?

[FhnuZoag]

Think of the usefulness of this thing in monitoring political speeches....

Re:Application?

[CheshireCatCO]

Wouldn't that be like taking a hygrometer to the bottom of the ocean? You don't need it to tell you what's out there, and it seems like you'd just break the equipment with the overload.

as if working on the phone didn't suck enough

[atarione]

already.... having recently quit a call center job.

it's bad enough as it is... clueless jerks calling in, monitoring of calls (subjective..monitoring by QA teams) Computer Monitoring... stupid conflicting targets (i.e. Help customers make sure everything they need is taken care or.... oh yeah but do it all within 4minutes..)

now some stupid software could be sitting about telling me that i'm not freaking excited enough about it.

god i quit not a momment to soon.... fuck it i say send all the call center jobs to India.

What we REALLY need...

[catdevnull]

Forget that device, what we really need is Caller IQ!

Ooops

[thebroken]

Oh those kinds of jerks..oops... *puts away vasseline*

Oh man

[mcc]

When you're getting advice in social graces from MIT... you know something's wrong

BA-DUM CHING

Re:How about a Jerk-O-Meter for Slashdot Trolls

[CHESTER COPPERPOT]

Jerk-o-meter is a synonym for moderator.

ooooohhh burn!

Re:Really now...

[Randseed]

And like, omg, this is so useless for females. I mean like, we are born with our very own Jerk-O-Meter's anyway!

Without a doubt. That's how women manage to keep dating the biggest jerks they can find, and complain to their "nice guy friend" who "they don't think of in that way" because "he's so nice and understanding."

Obligatory

[Linker3000]

Still no cure for cancer

Obligatory Simpsons Reference

[zaguar]

Nerd: I have invented the Sarcasm-O-Meter!

Cartoon-Shop-Guy: A Sarcasm-O-Meter? Now that's useful.

Sarcasm-O-Meter explodes

Apologies to Matt Groening

Re:Really now...

[Dogtanian]

The last thing we need is some random voice telling me to "Be nicer!".

It'd be like having your mother in the background during every phone conversation.

Product design

[sankyuu]

Imagine how the switch on the device would be labeled:

Jerk - on
Jerk - oh, nevermind...

:-)