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Armed Dolphins Released Into Gulf of Mexico

Posted by Zonk on from the flippered-and-dangerous dept.

An anonymous reader writes "The Guardian is reporting on what may be the weirdest Hurricane Katrina story yet. Military trained dolphins may have been released into the wild by the Hurricane's devastation." From the article: "Experts who have studied the U.S. navy's cetacean training exercises claim the 36 mammals could be carrying 'toxic dart' guns. Divers and surfers risk attack, they claim, from a species considered to be among the planet's smartest. The U.S. navy admits it has been training dolphins for military purposes, but has refused to confirm that any are missing. Dolphins have been trained in attack-and-kill missions since the Cold War. The U.S. Atlantic bottlenose dolphins have apparently been taught to shoot terrorists attacking military vessels. Their coastal compound was breached during the storm, sweeping them out to sea. But those who have studied the controversial use of dolphins in the U.S. defence programme claim it is vital they are caught quickly."

14 of 534 comments (clear)

  1. Obligatory... by rasafras · · Score: 0, Redundant

    Do they have laser beams?

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    1. Re:Obligatory... by Spock+the+Vulcan · · Score: 0, Redundant

      As long as they are not "fricking" laser beams...

  2. One miiiiiillion dollars by RaffiRai · · Score: 0, Redundant

    Can I be the first person to make that joke? I doubt it, but let's try :)

  3. I for one... by Approaching.sanity · · Score: 0, Redundant

    welcome the gulfs new dart gun shooting flipper waving overlords.

    What? Someone was going to say it.

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    RTFA again for the best results.
  4. Frickin'.... by Audent · · Score: 1, Redundant

    blah blah laser
    blah blah welcome new overlords
    blah blah cluster of these
    blah blah blah blah

    Frickaseein' wabbits

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    I am a leaf on the wind
  5. Toxic darts? by Snad · · Score: 0, Redundant

    What, no frickin' "lasers"?

  6. So long... by ScriptMonkey · · Score: 0, Redundant

    So long, and thanks for all the fish!

  7. Dr... Dr. Evil by robvangelder · · Score: 0, Redundant

    More fricken laser beam equipped sharks jokes.

  8. Whats next? by scmcclain · · Score: 0, Redundant

    Sharks with frickin' lasers on their heads?

  9. WEIRD. by priestx · · Score: 0, Redundant

    Do they have lasers on top of their heads too? Throw me a friggin' bone here.

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    "To be is to do." -Socrates
    "To do is to be." -Jean-Paul Sartre
    "Do-be-do-be-do." -Frank Sinatra
  10. Well, this is pretty bad news... by heelios · · Score: 0, Redundant

    But let me be the first to welcome our armed dolphin overlords!

  11. Re:Sound a little fishy to me. by ZakuSage · · Score: 0, Redundant

    I told you before: all I want is frickin' sharks with frickin' lasers on their heads. Is that so much to ask for?

  12. Re:Wit and Slashdot by maharg · · Score: 0, Redundant

    Sheeesh - there's a time and a plaice ...

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  13. Re:This just in... by TripMaster+Monkey · · Score: 0, Redundant


    I'm certain that, forseeing this, the Navy trained these dolphins extensively in hand-to-hand tactics (well, hand to flipper, at any rate...).

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