The Tongue Twisting Tooth Microphone

dylanduck writes "New Scientist has found a patent for a microphone that clips on your tooth, meaning you can stay in radio contact even the noisiest situations - like warzones. You use your tongue to flip it on and off. Here is the patent itself. The same article mentions a blimp that launches like a rocket."

Comments

What all of /. is thinking:

[JoeLinux]

That is exactly what the Imperial Stormtroopers used to activate their microphone in Star Wars.

(For those of you who had no life in High School, we learned these things. Then wondered why we had no girlfriends.)

Re:What all of /. is thinking:

[Anonymous Coward]

Actually, stormtrooper comms were just in the helmets; though the devices were controlled with the tongue, they don't have anything inside the mouth.

Lead Inventor's name

[backslashdot]

Anjanappa, Muniswamappa

A person may have a mic in his mouth, but that's not going to help anyone trying to say this guy's name.

Re:Lead Inventor's name

[schtum]

I thought you were replying to the Star Wars thread above and read that in a Jabba the Hutt voice: "ANJA-nappa, MUNI-swamappa, CHEW-bacca. Ho, ho, ho."

I missed out

[VATechTigger]

now all those idiots with toungue peircings can go to job interviews and say that they are just antenae for their cell phones for the competitive edge.....

Geeeth's with bwaceees rejoice!

[Nova Express]

Now rugged, he-men, special forces guys will lisp when they talk as well!

War zone?

[heavy snowfall]

I'll keep that in mind the next time I enter a war-zone. Like Henrico County, VA.

On a more serious note, this looks really interesting for diving. But it's just a patent, so I don't have too much faith in a product being released.

--
Use your bluetooth phone as a modem for Linux

This is basic Science Fiction made real.

[flogger]

John Steakly's book, Armor is the first book I read with this "technology". I love it when Life imitates Art.

during sex?

[chris_mahan]

So what happens with this little device during various sex acts?

I know, this is slashdot. The only sex acts involve, what... Wives? eheh

Now to combine different tooth technology

[Anonymous Coward]

Crap! Which tooth was the radio and which tooth was the cyanide again?

I saw it being used

[RNLockwood]

I saw it being used downtown on Monday, the guy didn't appear affluent enough for one but there he was, all by himself, carrying on a animated conversation with no cell phone or ear piece visible, drinking something in a paper sack.

Nate

A new combat injury

[Stephen Samuel]

I can see a lot of special forces soldiers suddenly biting their tongue in battle. Preventing that injury is probably going to be the subject of yet another patent.

THEY HID THE MICROPHONE IN MY TEETH.

[mcc]

The Freemasons. That's where they put the tracking device. In my teeth. My dentist betrayed me. He was just part of the network. They do it to keep tabs on you-- know where you are, hear everything by secret frequency. At first it was just the ones they'd sent back from the future, but after Tager broke the secret they had to move on to the general public, to ensure the truth didn't spread. Once they got a taste of power they wanted more. The operations expanded. 10,000 Americans every year. Now everything is in preparation for the Colonization. They hear everything. They know where to attack, when. They know where we're weak. It will begin soon.

Shit, have to go, I think I see helicopters. If I do not post on this site again you will know what happened.

Patent Filed 4-6-05 however public domain prior

[Brigadier]

Now one would think if this was put in a movie prior to the filing of the patent thus placing it in the public domain. This patent should not have been issued no ?? thoughts ? anyone anyone ......

Re:Patent Filed 4-6-05 however public domain prior

[craXORjack]

How about when Gilligan got hit in the mouth accidently and his filling became a radio and the Professor tried to turn it into a transmitter to get them off the island?

Cool, Reminds me of the Germans

[hobotron]

And their throat microphone that was widely used in their tank formations during World War II.

Patents patents ...

[karvind]

Two other websites about stupid patents:

Patently Silly

Totally Absurd Inventions America's Goofiest Patents!

Reminds me of Freeciv

[physicsphairy]

"New Scientist has found a patent for a microphone that clips on your tooth,"

It's just like an empire game!

"You found scrolls of ancient wisdom!"

"You found patent for modern technology!"

Good point

[Infonaut]

A lot of soldiers, particularly in the combat MOSes, chew tobacco. It's a nasty habit, and not particularly tactical (you can smell tobacco spit fairly easily, depending on the environment).

That said, this could be a real godsend for grunts. Hands-free is definitely where it's at. You need to be able to shoot, move, and communicate at all times. If you have to negate your ability to shoot even for a moment while you're communicating, it makes you vulnerable. The more distributed and essentially "always-on" communications becomes, the better.

Things are moving in the right direction. The concept of an RTO (radio telephone operator) who tags along with an officer, making both of them obvious targets, needs to disappear. The trick, of course, is effective miniaturization. This great, but it needs to be paired with long-range radios that are small enough to be part of a combat leader's load. No doubt the US military is spending a lot of money on just this sort of thing, and I'm sure there are spec ops units running around right now using commo equipment that blows doors on the stuff we had to use even ten years ago.

Re:Good point

[The Evil Couch]

True enough. The ASIPS kicks the crap out of the old SINGCARS radio, being roughly half the size and weight and improved features, and even the ASIPS is getting up in age. I think it's been out for something like 7 years. While miniaturizing radios is always a step in the right direction, something I've always seen Platoon Leaders doing (except the one previous to my current one, worthless cherry) is having two hand-mikes up at a time. While sometimes confusing, having a pair of radio handsets clipped to the helmet is pretty easy and makes communicating on seperate radio nets relatively simple.

Sticking multiple switches in someone's mouth would probably suck.

Getting access to the PL's radios in case he gets hit or completely spazes out under fire and starts giving retarded orders would be a problem if they were connected to his mouth, though.

I mean, I could *say* I was punching the PL in the mouth so I could get access to his radios, but I don't think they'd let me keep my squad afterwards. :p

Design flaws?

[Cave_Monster]

I really wonder how effective this mic would be. How is it affected by food, saliva, smoke, water etc? If it's highly susceptible to damage from these substances then that would require you to continually be taking it in and out of your mouth. What a hassle and highly prone to getting lost. What about if you accidentally swallowed it? Is that dangerous? And can it damage your teeth if, for example, you bit down really hard?

None of these issues really get addressed in the article, not to mention the ease at switching it on and off. Those listening to the transmission could be deeply traumatised by what they hear :)

Re:Hedwig and the Angry Inch

[The Clockwork Troll]

Per the parent, I presently possess a patent pending pertaining to patents with prior prototypes.

But is it...

[TheUnknownCoder]

bluetooth compatible?

Re:Hedwig and the Angry Inch

[Alex P Keaton in da]

A microphone that turns on with your tongue? I know of women who can get turned on with a tongue....

Been done already?

[zekemacneil]

The same article mentions a blimp that launches like a rocket."

Oh, you mean the Hindenburg?

Re:Been done already?

[kureido]

Oh, you mean the Hindenburg?

Too soon!

Preposterous!

[The-Trav-Man]

Patenting prior prototype patents? Prepare post-cards protesting!

Re:Useful

[jigyasubalak]

A person will have to be a pretty good cunning-linguist
to operate that thing with one's tongue!

You Bastard!

[bennomatic]

> here's a little clue: every language but English is phonetic

My French teacher didn't think so. I just failed my midterms because of your "wisdom". Merci beaucoup!

Or as you would have me pronounce it, "Murr-kih bee-yow-cowp"

;-)