Slashdot Mirror
Geneticists Claim Aging Breakthrough
Quirk writes "The Science section of The Guardian is reporting on recent experiments by geneticists 'to unlock the secrets of the aging process has created organisms that live six times their usual lifespan, raising hopes that it might be possible to slow ageing in humans.' 'In the experiment, Dr Longo's team took yeast cells and knocked out two key genes, named Sir2 and SCH9. The latter governs the cells' ability to convert nutrients into energy. They found that instead of dying after a week, the cells lived for up to six weeks.''Research has now begun to test whether the effect works in mice.' So it looks like we might soon have near immortal, fearless mice."
I am Mickey McMouse of the clan McMouse, and I am immortal.
i know exactly when these amazing age-related breakthroughs will come to fruition for humanity
exactly at the age at which i am too old to partake of any of it
intellectual property law is philosophically incoherent. it is your moral duty to ignore it or sabotage it
At this rate I'm never gonna get to sit at the big table on Thanksgiving
Where we can get fearless, immortal, FLYING mice, then I'll be excited.
Especially if they can also sing "Here I come to save the day."
That's "Mr. Soulless Automaton" to you, Bub.
This will give Brain time to take over the world!
So in other words, I should invest my money in retirement homes?
Hero of Allacrost, a FOSS RPG for *NIX/*BSD/OS X/Win
I for one welcome our fearless, near-immortal, rodent overlords.
(that wouldn't be Frankie and Benjie mouse, by an chance, would it?)
Fearless imortal mice?!? Maybe my "wanna see my spaceship" pick up line will start working again!
-Rick
"Most people in the U.S. wouldn't know they live in a tyrannical state if it walked up and grabbed their junk." - MyFirs
Don't forget that they can regenerate body parts, so the only way to kill them is to cut their head off. There can be only one...
No problem. Just make sterilization a prerequisite for immortality.
At the rate of mice-related stories we've been getting on Slashdot lately, I'm getting worried that the next one is going to be how scientists found a way to make mice smarter.
"What are we going to do tonight, Brain?"
"Same thing we do every night, Pinky: try to take over the world!"
"Pinky, are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
"I think I am, Brain, but wherever are we going to find cool whip and rubber shorts at this hour?"
>> Our tax rates will be 80% of our income.
So... stopping this aging gene also turns us into Swedes?
Perhaps it's been done and a new breed of super inteligent mice have taken over slashdot?
Drag n' Drop DVD Recommendations
And soon our scientists will say stuffs like... Wernstrom: "Face it, Farnsworth, you're over the hill. It's time to leave science to the hundred-twenty-year-olds." Farnsworth: "You young turks think you know everything! I was inventing things when you were barely turning senile." Wernstrom: "Haha! Go home before you embarrass yourself, old man! Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to take a nap before the ceremonies."
Not if I have anything to say about it.
There can be only one.
<xml><I><am><so><damn>Web 2.0</damn></so></am></I></xml>
This is all a ploy by Disney to justify keeping Micky under copy-wraps for 600 years.
...or maybe not.
Is that why all those starving people in Africa all live to be 180 years old?
Don't worry. Scientists are also developing this new substance called soylent green which will help feed all these people.
Beheading doesn't work. They just regenerate the whole body.
I've got two research projects going on concerning this issue, which will become a major problem in the not too distant future if geek pop culture has taught us anything at all. One involves the experimental use of fire and / or acid to prevent regeneration after the supermouse has been beaten down; the second option is more extreme, involving the simultaneous destruction of all the mouse's cells leaving nothing behind from which it can regenerate. This is the secret Project Kamehameha.
Real Daleks don't climb stairs - they level the building.
Hey! Don't forget about their newly acquired ability to REGENERATE too!
http://pharyngula.org/index/weblog/comments/tales
Soon you'll never be able to get these vampire mice out of your house.
They can't be stopped and I think it's all being orchestrated by the greedy mouse trap company cartels.
> How will we justify the use of this when so many people die very young from preventable causes that are beyond their control (as opposed to simply not taking care of oneself)?
/. sucks @$$ for posting code snippets "Your comment has too few characters per line" ??
/. eats extra whitespace in "code" -- any workarounds?
You're under the delusion that their are accidents. There are none. Everything that happens, happens for a reason.
> How will we prevent the extreme accumulation of wealth that this would allow if it is not equally accessible to everyone?
The same way we prevented it today. Oh wait, we didn't.
--
You are a fucktards.