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Bill Gates' Taxes Require Special Computer
NightWulf writes "News AU claims Bill Gates said in an interview, his fortune is so big, that the IRS needs a special computer, because a normal one can't handle the numbers. The IRS must have had to switch from PC's to Macs just for Gates."
Except the special computer that the IRS use for my taxes is an Altair.
Its not that the numbers are too big, its that the EULA he staples to his tax forms require it be processed by 100% MS software.
Some bring out the best in others, some the worst. Some bring out far more.
There is only ONE computer that could possibly handle these calculations.
I have an idea, if your fortune gets to be so large that even the IRS can't figure it all out, you should be required to give some of it away to the poor until they can do the necessary calculations.
That being said, I will accept cash and postal money orders only please.
He who knows best knows how little he knows. - Thomas Jefferson
They do mine on a napkin with a red pen.
Gamingmuseum.com: Give your 3D accelerator a rest.
Moe: "Say, Barn. Uh, remember when I said I'd have to send away to NASA to calculate your bar tab?"
Barney: "Oh ho, oh yeah. We all had a good laugh, Moe."
Moe: "The results came back today."
I'm a big tall mofo.
===== Murphy's Law is recursive. =====
"Oh, please, please, Mr. IRS Man, please give me the latex glove audit."
MS Money.
MS Money Small Business Edition.
MS Money Enterprise.
MS Money Multi-national Edition.
MS Money Dr. Evil Edition.
MS Money Dr. Evil Edition with Laser Beams.
and never will, unless they can effectively divide by 0.
In other news, Steve Balmer threw a chair at the IRS computer so he could also claim they needed a new "special" one for him too.
Proof by very large bribes. QED.
...640K was enough for anybody?
#naabhaprzrag, #sverubfr-000, #agi-fcbafberq, negvpyr[pynff*=' negvpyr-ary-'] { qvfcynl: abar !vzcbegnag; }
Does this special computer run on Windows?
I need Microsoft Money 64-bit edition to handle my personal finance...
...when Chuck Norris sends in his taxes, he sends blank forms and includes only a picture of himself, crouched and ready to attack. Chuck Norris has not had to pay taxes, ever.
Synchronize your calendar and mobile phone via text messaging.
Mr. Simpson, this computer can process NINE tax returns per DAY. Did you really think you could fool it?
You must be raking in the dough.
They send mine to this fellow.
Yah, they hadda build one with dials that go to 11.
There is no God, and Dirac is his prophet.
$64.0 billion ought to be enough for anybody.
They do mine with one liner shell script.
"Don't let fools fool you. They are the clever ones."
I'm inclined to believe it. About four years ago, I did a little consulting work with a guy whose full time job was working for the US Treasury Department on a project named "System 89", so named because it was originally scheduled for completion in 1989.
If I don't put anything here, will anyone recognize me anymore?
Bill's home mortgage (if it exists) does not exist.
Whoa, man, you're blowing my mind!
It's probably in the Windows kernel somewhere, "if (SSN==Bill's_SSN) { TaxOwed = 0; TaxPayback = "$1 Billion"; }"...
What time is it/will be over there? Check with my iPhone app!
Well that would certainly explain the mysterious nonabsoluteness of the relationship between what the Tax Man says I owe, and that which I am prepared to pay!
unsigned int question = 0x2B | ~(0x2B)
General Relativity: Space-time tells matter where to go; Matter tells space-time what shape to be.