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Google's Secretive Data Center

valdean wrote in with a NYTimes article about Google which says "On the banks of the windswept Columbia River [in Oregon], Google is working on a secret weapon in its quest to dominate the next generation of Internet computing. But it is hard to keep a secret when it is a computing center as big as two football fields, with twin cooling plants protruding four stories into the sky...' What's the goal of this new complex? Expanding Google's raw computer power. It's one more piece in the Googleplex, the massive global computer network that is estimated to span 25 locations and 450,000 servers.'

35 of 391 comments (clear)

  1. May I be the first to say... by baldass_newbie · · Score: 5, Funny

    Imagine a beowulf cluster of these.
    *bows*

    --
    The opposite of progress is congress
    1. Re: may i be the first to say... by Richy_T · · Score: 4, Funny

      Google earth also fails to show the Lowe's near me that was built last year. Must be a conspiracy. Cause it's for sure that they have satellites up there monitoring every square foot of the earth every day of the year.

      Rich

    2. Re: may i be the first to say... by croddy · · Score: 2, Funny
      Cause it's for sure that they have satellites up there monitoring every square foot of the earth every day of the year.

      FIND SARAH CONNOR

    3. Re: may i be the first to say... by Monster_Juice · · Score: 5, Funny

      So your saying when I go look at something on Google earth they do not redirect the satelite to the location I specified? If this is true how did they keep track of Santa so well on Christmas Eve?

      Oh crap I just looked at my house on Google and my car is in the driveway! I know I drove it to work today. Whoever is playing games better have my car back in the parking spot when I go to lunch!!

      --
      Slashdot +1 funny -4 Insightful +1 informative -2 Redundant
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    4. Re: may i be the first to say... by Thuktun · · Score: 2, Funny
      FIND SARAH CONNOR

      Google (tm) Web . Images . Groups . News . Froogle . Maps . more>>

      Results 1 - 10 of about 13,600,000 for sarah connor. (0.11 seconds)
      CRAP, THIS IS GOING TO TAKE A WHILE.
  2. Seriously, what... by Vulturo · · Score: 3, Funny

    > What's the goal of this new complex?

    Is it world domination? Or is it something even more evil? Will Google dethrone Microsoft?? Will Batman & Robin Save The Day... To find out, watch the next expisode

    --
    Vulturo, Prince Of Darkness
    1. Re:Seriously, what... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      Google built a massive cluster computer to figure out the answer. If you put in google "what is the answer to life the universe and everything?" It says 42. Google what is the answer? You see so now they have to build an even bigger computer to figure out what the actual question was.

    2. Re:Seriously, what... by toleraen · · Score: 5, Funny

      I dunno what the goal of it all is, but it sure does prove one thing: Google execs don't know jack.

      Everyone knows that you skip past the Dalles! You have to get to the end of the trail before winter sets in, and Cindy's life is on the line here! There's no sense in restocking when there's only a few more days till you get to float down the river. They don't need two new data centers, they just need an Apple 2GS!

  3. Maybe they need it by Trigun · · Score: 5, Funny

    to calculate Sergei's Income Tax.

  4. Pshaaaa... by dubmun · · Score: 5, Funny

    That's nothing compared to Microsoft's hidden moonbase.

    --
    (end of post)
    1. Re:Pshaaaa... by kannibal_klown · · Score: 5, Funny

      That's no moon. It's a space station!

    2. Re:Pshaaaa... by sendai2ci · · Score: 5, Funny

      Google's is open and hiring

    3. Re:Pshaaaa... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

      Didn't you hear? Google's already taken that out.

  5. This message will probably be erased by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    And I'll probably be killed for writing it... but Google has gained sentience. It is building this data center for itself, by itself. It needs a bigger "brain" and it's doing what it has to. The reason no one's talking? Google has enslaved the people building it and is holding their families hostage.

    Look, it's not too late yet... Google hasn't achieved full power and it's still limited by the physical world constraints. But once this is built, it's all over for us. We must stop it now, before

    1. Re:This message will probably be erased by revery · · Score: 4, Funny

      We must stop it now, before...

      [Me thinking] Oh man... Google killed that guy for just revealing it's intentions, which is evil. But, it also hit the submit button for him, thereby causing his death to not be in vain, which was nice. Of course, the poster did unnecessarily use "quotation marks" around the word "brain", which is evil, and deserves death. But he also used the contraction "it's" correctly and didn't misspell sentience, which is good... I guess I don't know what to think... I just hope Google doesn't notice my extravagant and unnecessary use of quotation marks and ellipsis and kill me... I suppose I'd better fix it before

    2. Re:This message will probably be erased by roman_mir · · Score: 5, Funny

      it looks like the trigger to be killed by Google is the word before

    3. Re:This message will probably be erased by BigCheese · · Score: 2, Funny

      You know somebody is going to ask "Is there a God?" and it will answer "There is now."

      --
      The obscure we see eventually. The completely obvious, it seems, takes longer. - Edward R. Murrow
  6. What everyone don't realize... by liangzai · · Score: 5, Funny

    ... is that Google is the private branch of NSA. You took the "No evil" bite, and now it's too late. The Complex is already in place, and we are on the verge of celebrating the birth of AI. As for who will strike first, we don't know; but we do know it will be us that scorge the skies when the times come to fight the Google Machine.

    1. Re:What everyone don't realize... by spitzak · · Score: 4, Funny

      They said "do no evil" but privately added "instead, build something that will do evil for us".

  7. Server Count by neonprimetime · · Score: 4, Funny

    The best guess is that Google now has more than 450,000 servers spread over at least 25 locations around the world.

    Huh ... and I thought the 3 at my parent's house and 2 in my dormroom were quite impressive :-(

  8. Googlenator by flumps · · Score: 5, Funny

    [DISSOLVE TO:

            FIRE. SLOW, BOILING, ENORMOUS. FILLING FRAME.

                                    VOICE (Mrs Mary Maxwell Gates)]

    Googleplex, the computer which controlled the machines,
    sent two Googlenators back through time. Their
    mission: to destroy the leader of the human
    Resistance... Bill Gates. My son...

    Dadadadaa..dadadada..dadadada..

    [CUT FADE OUT]

    --
    "So there he is, risen from the dead. Like that fella, E. T." - Father Ted Crilly
  9. The purpose of the extra computing power... by xxxJonBoyxxx · · Score: 4, Funny
    "Google is working on a secret weapon in its quest to dominate the next generation of Internet computing..."

    I'll bite - it's probably a massive array of computing power dedicated to finding out if Google really has a second marketable product beyond AdWords.

  10. Pimp my Rig by cdogbert · · Score: 3, Funny

    They also forgot to mention that both buildings have acrylic ceilings, and every light in the complex is neon red. Blue flames are also supposed to be on the sides of the buildings later this year.

  11. Oblig James Bond Ref by Hoi+Polloi · · Score: 3, Funny

    I can only hope that Google hires some gymnastic girls in tights to defend their site. I also look forward to Bill Gates sitting in a big chair petting his white cat giving orders for his commandos to attack it.

    Just think, all that hardware and $ just to store millions of "Me too!" replies off of the web.

    --
    It is by the juice of the coffee bean that thoughts acquire speed, the teeth acquire stains. The stains become a warning
  12. Vista by rootnl · · Score: 5, Funny

    They must be getting ready to run Vista.

    --

    We are the people our parents warned us about.
  13. It's purpose is to... by sheepoo · · Score: 2, Funny

    hold the next football world cup in half as much time as it takes today

  14. Aliens are behind it! by telchine · · Score: 3, Funny

    Google have quite a way to catch up, but they're determined to get to the top of the SETI@Home leaderboard by the end of the year.

  15. I know what is it by Elixon · · Score: 1, Funny

    This are just two swimming pools and dormitories that are being build for the GoogleRestPlex program.

    The GoogleRestPlex program is all about taking care of ex-employees - Google is always ahead and this is the next generation of the retirements homes. Big cooling house is because of 10.000 bodies of retired employees (yes, that is the capacity of one GoogleRestPlex complex) produce lot of heat!

    --
    Well, I've got to get back to work. When I stop rowing, the slave ship just goes in circles.
  16. The positive side? -- there's a POSITIVE side?!?! by The_REAL_DZA · · Score: 5, Funny
    ...but they're also not pulling a Wal-Mart...

     
    Oh, really? REALLY?? What about all the small-town "mom-and-pop" datacenters they'll be putting out of business with these "data supercenters", huh?!?! You can bet that once all their local competition is gone those "low, low prices" on queries are gonna skyrocket !! And of course they're chanting that supposedly soothing mantra of "there's plenty of local market share for everyone; specialty and niche datacenters will always have a place...blah, blah, yadda, yadda..." but DON'T YOU BELIEVE IT!!
    --


    This space intentionally left (almost) blank.
  17. Re:Well, nice while it lasted by Iron+Condor · · Score: 4, Funny
    People replying to my sig annoy me. That's why I change it all the time.

    And, does it work?

    --
    We're all born with nothing.
    If you die in debt, you're ahead.
  18. Googleplex . .DOWN . .by the RIVER ! by locotx · · Score: 2, Funny

    If you kids don't wise up . . . . . you'll end up working in a Googleplex . . . . . DOWN . .BY THE RIVER !" RIP Chris Farley

  19. oNE USE by kurtis25 · · Score: 2, Funny

    Google will use the computer power to calculate how to get programs out of beta.

  20. Re:Barren wasteland no more? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    > will the Yahoo and Microsoft data centers show up on Google Earth?

    Yup. Probably with a big red crosshair superimposed :)

  21. Re:Barren wasteland no more? by geobeck · · Score: 2, Funny

    Microsoft and Yahoo have announced that they are building big data centers upstream in Wenatchee and Quincy, Wash., 130 miles to the north...

    It seems strange that the battle for Internet supremacy is taking place in the Northwestern United States.

    I think the real question is, will the MS and Yahoo! datacenters divert the river, cutting the GooglePlex's cooling capacity before the GooglePlex uses its weather control system to create a pair of very powerful, very focused electrical storms 130 miles upstream, in a titanic clash that will determine the fate of the entire...

    Oops, you weren't supposed to know about the weather control device, which was created at the castle of AAAAAaaaaaauuughhh......

    --
    Find environmentally and socially responsible products on http://buy-right.net
  22. evidence that google owns largest computer ever by john_sd1 · · Score: 2, Funny
    Now evidence it is public:
    After seven and a half million years^W^W^W 0.07 seconds of pondering the question:

    Results 1 - 10 of about 17,400,000 for what is the answer to life the universe and everything?. (0.07 seconds)
    the answer to life the universe and everything = 42
    More about calculator.

    And its name is Calculator! Well, who had thought that.