Slashdot Mirror


More Massive Layoffs at AOL

dawnzer writes "It looks like AOL read the comments from Slashdotters saying that 950 employees do not constitute a 'massive' layoff. Several news sites are reporting that AOL is getting ready to cut 5,000 jobs, or roughly 26 percent of their global workforce. Now that's more like it."

6 of 220 comments (clear)

  1. Sweet by Umbral+Blot · · Score: 5, Funny

    Does this mean that AOL is going away, because I'm getting excited just thinking about it.

    1. Re:Sweet by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      The Coaster Association of America embraces this development whole-heartedly and expects growth rates of up to 10,000%.

  2. Conspiracy! by Linkiroth · · Score: 5, Funny

    26%!!?? AOL is cutting their employees by AMD's marketshare. Intel's in bed with AOL! It makes perfect sense!

  3. MISQUOTE by NoGuffCheck · · Score: 5, Funny

    I'm sorry but the article has misquoted John Miller AOL CEO. His actual statement went more like this:

    Following last nights board meeting, the AOL directors would like to confirm the rumours that we have decided to move away from our core business, the manufacture and distribution of drink coasters and frizbees. We are now seeking to restructure the relevant departments and pursue a profitable business model of providing our internet services at no cost to non subscribers. [ Long Pauses ] As a result we belive that within 6 months anyone in our employ today with half a brain will no longer be with the company....*phone rings* ahhh, hello?. yes Satan... sorry I gotta take this

    --
    serenity now!
  4. Re:I work for AOL by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    "I manage a team of Retention Specialists in Reston (posting AC for obvious reasons)"

    Yeah, OK...except you didn't post as AC, Mr. "Quokkapox"...
    - Your Boss

    P.S. Please see HR in the morning.

  5. Work Free For 45 Days! by poormanjoe · · Score: 5, Funny

    If after 45 days you are not completly satisfied with your Employment Service Provider, cancel at no charge!**
     
    **You must call to cancel your employment status or will continued to be employed at the standard rate.

    --
    I want to be retired when I grow up.