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Peter Jackson Will Not Be Making The Hobbit
An anonymous reader writes "Due to legal wranglings with New Line Cinema over accounting issues for Lord Of The Rings, Peter Jackson and Fran Walsh will not be involved in the making of either The Hobbit or the planned Lord of the Rings prequel." I suppose there is still a chance that Jackson & Co. could end up involved, but at this point that looks unlikely.
"The Hobbit or the planned Lord of the Rings prequel"
Sorry?? The Hobbit *IS* the prequel to LOTR. Please tell they're not going
to get some Hollywood paint-by-numbers screenwriters commitee to butcher Tolkeins
ideas and come up with some Phantom Menace debarcle? Will they have Gollum with
dreadlocks and speaking in some fau-jamaican patois and Gandalf as some all-american
apple pie and freckles kid who Has Yet To Discover His Powers blah blah etc etc.
Gah!
Next up: Jim Henson's Hobbit Babies.
Slashdot Burying Stories About Slashdot Media Owned
After I RTFA, it looks like they're trying to spank Jackson for calling them on their accounting practices. He wouldn't settle on their terms, so "his services will not be needed".
The guy made them a bleepin' 10^9 bucks with the trilogy, and they assume they can slot in any schmoe that can aim a camera? And I suppose they're too damn cheap to go back to WETA Digital for the FX too, they'll get some folks from over at Sci-Fi Channel and it'll be just fine.
At this point we can only hope the project collapses from being nickle-and-dimed to extinction.
Gandalf the brown (named because of his cloak) will guide young Baggins in the way of the Foot in his quest against the evil dragon master. Along the way Bilbo becomes an expert at fighting with light staffs. Gollum is going to become very ashmatic and have a penchant for black outfits with funny helmets. The 13 dwarves, or dwarf army as they will be referred to dont really feature.
Do not try to read the dupe, thats impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth
What truth?
There is no dupe
Given the hideous mess he made of LOTR, I'm relatively pleased that he won't be butchering The Hobbit in the same way.
:)
I hear it's Uwe Boll doing The Hobbit, so it definitely won't be butchered in the same way.
And rumour has it they're going to bring in the #1 expert on prequels and CGI characters.
I, for one, welcome George Lucas and our new taller, more prominently be-eared, rastafarian Gollum.
Meesa servsa the precious.
Now nothing stands in the way of the ideal Hollywood version, with Paris Hilton as Galadriel, Ben Affleck as Gandalf, Jack Black as Sam Gamgee, and Keanu Reeve as Frodo ("The ring... Whoa!")
Where were you when the voynix came?
Given the size of the book it was inveitable he'd have to emit large chunks of it
Sorry, I don't mean to be a spelling nazi, but I just can't get over the mental image of Peter Jackson emitting large chunks of books. My day is ruined.
sudo ergo sum
Agreed. It would be like making Star Wars 7 and not having Lucas remotely involved. It is just not a good idea period.
Yes, he certainly did. Here's what the original version was supposed to look like:
Nasty Hobbitses, nowsa yousa gonna die.
If you were blocking sigs, you wouldn't have to read this.
Finally, a chance for JarJaromir to shine!
How about not making the Hobbit at all?
Ha ha, dream on. You're going to get Hobbit Returns, The Hobbit's Revenge, and Hobbit Resurrection.
Sam is also going to get his own spinoff movie, Samwise (the Legend of Sam Gamgee). They'll also make Gandalf in Love.
And then, and then, just to piss everyone off and make some more money, they're going to hire a bunch of unemployed crap writers to produce a novelization of each of these movies, regardless of whether each film is already based on a Tolkien work or not. Just like that novelization they produced of Planet of the Apes, a movie already "loosely based" on the novel by French author Pierre Boulle.
But just like PJ and The Hobbit, keep the hope alive buddy, keep the hope alive.
"Unheard of means only it's undreamed of yet,
Impossible means not yet done." ~~ Julia Ecklar
And no offense PJ if you're reading this - but I seriously doubt you're a better story teller than the Old Professor.
Everyone needs an editor. And anyone who writes more Liv Tyler With Elf Ears scenes onto the screen can't be all that bad.
Jar-Jar is free to shine, but only if what's shining on him is boiling oil.
Beware: In C++, your friends can see your privates!
They'll also make Gandalf in Love.
Brokeback Helm's Deep?
There is no right to feel safe thru security vaudeville at the expense of everyone's freedom, privacy and tax money.
Three words. Elf Bitch Romance.
Seriously, what the hell was that about, what did it have to do with the ring, and who's ass was it pulled from?
Say bad words about my book, in cold oatmeal, or I shall sue!
Though if they would just wait a few years, this would give Lucas a chance to destroy the childhoods of a whole new generation of moviegoers.
I Am My Own Worst Enemy