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Scientist Develops Caffeinated Baked Goods

Posted by Zonk on from the we-truly-live-in-an-age-of-wonders dept.

Zephyros writes "The AP is reporting on a scientist who has found a way to get caffeine into donuts, bagels, and other baked goods without the bitter flavor. Each piece has as much caffeine as two cups of coffee. No word on when or where they will be available, but for those of us that just don't get the same kick from the morning cuppa that we used to, this may be another tasty delivery vector to look forward to for that jump-start."

15 of 195 comments (clear)

  1. Why am I not surprised... by Hobbs0 · · Score: 3, Funny

    ...that this was an American scientist?

    1. Re:Why am I not surprised... by kfg · · Score: 5, Funny

      But wait! Don't order yet.

      He's already at work inventing the decafinated version.

      KFG

    2. Re:Why am I not surprised... by saskboy · · Score: 2, Funny

      Overheard in a Tim Hortons in five years:
      "I'll take a Decaf muffin please."

      --
      Saskboy's blog is good. 9 out of 10 dentists agree.
  2. One thing is for sure... by Tablizer · · Score: 5, Funny

    cops will be mega-hyper

    --
    Table-ized A.I.
  3. Re:Great... by Tablizer · · Score: 5, Funny

    how long it will take before somebody does something really stupid with all of these products, and deliberately or inadvertently manages to harm themself or someone else. It doesn't take all THAT much caffeine to cause some pretty nasty side effects, especially if you don't drink it all that often.

    S-s-s-stop b'b'b'b'being s's's'so PPPPPParan n n noid!!!

    --
    Table-ized A.I.
  4. Next Up by umbrellasd · · Score: 4, Funny

    Chocolate Chip Meth Cookies

  5. Re:I'm still waiting by Tablizer · · Score: 5, Funny

    Caffeinated Bacon

    Caffeinated extra sweet salted Bacon with MSG: The Ultimate American food. It grows hair on your chest, even while you are dead.

    --
    Table-ized A.I.
  6. Still no cure for cancer by ZP-Blight · · Score: 2, Funny

    Still no cure for cancer. Good to know research money is well spent.

    --
    Zoom Player Lead Dev.
  7. Why is this news... by abshnasko · · Score: 5, Funny

    ...people have been doing this with Marijuana for years.

  8. Coffee Cake by EricJ2190 · · Score: 5, Funny

    This gives coffee cake a whole new meaning.

  9. That's just what we need! by ArcherB · · Score: 4, Funny

    Wired fat people! Will they shake, or jiggle?

    --
    There is no "I disagree" mod for a reason. Flamebait, Troll, and Overrated are not substitutes.
  10. Wired Milk! by resistant · · Score: 4, Funny

    I'm telling you true, what I really want is caffeinated milk, that's what to do. Man, I love skim milk, and if it were wired, I'd be racing around just like a cow siren yelling, "MoooOOOoooOOOoooOOOoooOOOoooOOO!!!"

    --
    A truly excellent pizza parlor is a delight unto the heavens. Treasure the sauce and the toppings!
  11. Re:I'm still waiting by Reverend528 · · Score: 4, Funny

    Well, once they perfect the caffeinated bacon, it'll only be a matter of time until we'll have baconated grapefruit.

    --
    Badass Resumes
  12. Re:I'm still waiting by Dirtside · · Score: 3, Funny

    I'm still waiting for Viscount Chocula and Admiral Crunch.

    --
    "Destroy science and religion. Science would re-emerge exactly the same; but not religion." - Penn Jillette, paraphrased
  13. what the heck is "coffee cake" anyway? by commodoresloat · · Score: 2, Funny

    to paraphrase father guido sarducci, it's an insult to both coffee and cake!