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SETI Finally Finds Something

Posted by samzenpus on from the laptop-phone-home dept.

QuatumCrypto writes "SETI@home is a distributed processing client from UC Berkeley that installs on the volunteers' home computers and harnesses their processing power in the search for extraterrestrial intelligence. So far nothing noteworthy has comeout of this massive project... that is until today! One of the volunteers was able to track down his wife's stolen laptop using the IP address that SETI@home client reports back to the server. After getting back the laptop his wife said, 'I always knew that a geek would make a great husband.'"

23 of 416 comments (clear)

  1. Welcome by suso · · Score: 5, Funny

    SETI@home is a distributed processing client from UC Berkeley that installs on the vounteers' home computers and harnesses their processing power in the search for extraterrestrial intelligence.

    Those of you that are visiting Slashdot for the first time and didn't know that, you might want to stick around (and scroll down) because we're going to explain what a Beowulf Cluster is next.

    1. Re:Welcome by Dr.+Eggman · · Score: 5, Funny

      In Soviet Russia, Beowulf Cluster explains you!

      --
      Demented But Determined.
    2. Re:Welcome by ChunderDownunder · · Score: 5, Funny

      There I was thinking Beowulf was from Dark Ages Scandinavia.

      Never mind, perhaps I'm new here.

    3. Re:Welcome by hobo+sapiens · · Score: 5, Funny

      1) explain what a beowulf cluster is
      2) make soviet russia joke
      3) make netcraft reference
      4) ?????
      5) profit!!!



      One too many? You decide!

      --
      blah blah blah
    4. Re:Welcome by bobscealy · · Score: 5, Funny

      I, for one, welcome our beowulf explaining overlords.

    5. Re:Welcome by Nasheer · · Score: 5, Funny

      All your clusters are belong to us!

      --
      - Please, ignore everything written above.
    6. Re:Welcome by McFadden · · Score: 5, Funny

      1) explain what a beowulf cluster is
      2) make soviet russia joke
      3) make netcraft reference
      You forgot to mention that this story is clearly a fake, since it makes the outrageous accusation that at some point in time a woman not only found a geek attractive, but also married him.
    7. Re:Welcome by rahmza · · Score: 5, Funny

      I don't understand all these jokes, you insensitive clod!

    8. Re:Welcome by charlieman · · Score: 5, Funny

      I for one welcome our new clueless overlords!

    9. Re:Welcome by mindwhip · · Score: 5, Funny

      'Woman' is malware that will take over your hardware and software, reorder your contacts and friends lists, removing any that 'Woman' finds unsuitable then inserts other friends and contacts into your address book that you have no wish to ever deal with. Finally 'woman' takes complete control of your schedule and finances leaving you with no control over your own life.

      'Woman' will also, if left unchecked, upgrade automatically from 'friend 9.2' to 'girlfriend 3.4' and eventually to 'wife 1.0'. If this happens the only way to get rid of 'woman' is via very expensive software... 'divorce 1.0' which will leave you with even less money than when you had 'wife 1.0' problems.

      --
      [The Universe] has gone offline.
    10. Re:Welcome by complete+loony · · Score: 5, Funny

      You appear to be posting a

      ( ) in Soviet Russia
      (x) I for one welcome out new ... overlords
      ( ) imagine a Beowulf cluster
      ( ) Does it run Linux
      ( ) Spam prevention will not work checklist
      (x) You must be new here
      ( ) insensitive clod
      ( ) in Korea only old people
      ( ) Netcraft confirms
      ( ) Stephen King is dead
      ( ) a highly moderated post from the previous duped story
      ( ) gee I've never had that probl%!$*%& [No Carrier]

      post in an attempt to obtain karma. Your attempt will not work. Here is why it won't work. (One or more of the following may apply to your particular post, and it may have other flaws which used to vary from topic to topic.)

      (x) Posts like yours are getting old an tired, and quite frankly we're sick of them
      (x) Your User Id is too high
      ( ) It just isn't funny enough
      (x) Funny mods don't give karma

      Specifically, your post fails to cater to

      ( ) Anything relevant to the story
      (x) Extreme stupidity on the part of moderators
      ( ) Extensive research into the topic

      and the following philosophical objections may also apply:

      ( ) Posts similar to yours are easy to come up with, yet none have ever been highly moderated
      ( ) That's a common troll that has never been verified
      (x) You obviously haven't read the article
      (x) You haven't even read the summary
      ( ) Or the headline
      ( ) Killing you that way is not slow and painful enough

      Furthermore, this is what I think about you:

      ( ) Sorry dude, but I don't think it would work.
      (x) This is a stupid post, and you're a stupid person for posting it.
      ( ) Nice try, assh0le! I'm going to find out where you live and burn your
      house down!
      --
      09F91102 no, 455FE104 nope, F190A1E8 uh-uh, 7A5F8A09 that's not it, C87294CE no. Ah! 452F6E403CDF10714E41DFAA257D313F.
  2. sETi ... by thrillseeker · · Score: 5, Funny

    phone home.

  3. Does this mean by fredrated · · Score: 5, Funny

    that there is intelligent life on Earth?

    1. Re:Does this mean by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      Well, there is at least one intelligent life form on the planet (me). I can't speak for the 8 billion of you dumbasses, though.

    2. Re:Does this mean by EvanED · · Score: 5, Funny

      Current estimates are 6.6 billion. Where'd you get 8 from? And who's the dumbass?

    3. Re:Does this mean by VultureMN · · Score: 5, Funny

      Holy crap, he's posting ... FROM THE FUTURE!

    4. Re:Does this mean by Trogre · · Score: 5, Funny

      Perhaps he's including dolphins and mice.

      --
      "Nine times out of ten, starting a fire is not the best way to solve the problem." - my wife
  4. Gah! by StikyPad · · Score: 5, Funny

    I felt a great disturbance in the force, as if millions of voices cheered and were suddenly silenced.

    --
    https://www.eff.org/https-everywhere
  5. ouch by GlitchyBits · · Score: 5, Funny

    Sensationalism strikes back ... and it hurts. Anyway, it proves that at least one geek in the entire world (universe ?) had sex that night.

  6. Nothing noteworthy by whackeroony · · Score: 5, Insightful

    "So far nothing noteworthy has come out of this massive project"

    Dismissed a trend-setting project with just that one line. Of course, it does not matter that SETI@Home showed the power of volunteer computing for the first time, led to new advances in distributed computing, motivated Grid computing and PlanetLab among others and spun off BOINC, an open source project that serves as a base for similar @Home projects.

    But, of course, it no find me any ALIEN!!! Bah,

  7. Re:The Search by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Well don't be too hard on him. Seti@Home is some kind of demon; it posessed my computer. After I closed the window, it was still running!

  8. She's in for a shock... by Leuf · · Score: 5, Funny

    I always knew that a geek would make a great husband

    Sure it turned out handy this one freak incident, but wait till there's smoke in the house and he looks back and forth between the plasma screen and the laptop a couple times, finally grabs the laptop and is out the door without so much as a look in her direction.

    Of course, if the laptop started the fire then the choice is much easier

  9. Comment removed by account_deleted · · Score: 5, Funny

    Comment removed based on user account deletion