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Your Chance to be an Astronaut

codewarrior78411 writes "NASA posted a hiring notice for new astronauts Tuesday, on usajobs.com, seeking for the first time in almost 30 years men and women to fly aboard spacecraft other than the shuttle. The agency is seeking 10 to 15 new faces for three to six-month missions aboard the international space station." Requirements include 'Must be a U.S. citizen between 5-foot-2 and 6-foot-3 in height (to squeeze into Russia's three-passenger Soyuz capsule)' 'At least a bachelor's degree in engineering, a biological or physical science, or mathematics' 'three years of relevant professional experience' and most interestingly 'Vision correctable to 20/20. For the first time, the space agency will consider applicants who have undergone successful refractive eye surgery.'

47 of 302 comments (clear)

  1. (this joke will appear a thousand times) by pzs · · Score: 5, Funny

    Must be willing to wear a diaper on long drives?

    Peter

    1. Re:(this joke will appear a thousand times) by eniac42 · · Score: 5, Funny

      (sigh).. Must be able to convert feet to meters..

      --
      "A nation that forgets its past is doomed to repeat it." - Churchill
    2. Re:(this joke will appear a thousand times) by rbarreira · · Score: 2, Funny

      Also, must be able to drink a lot of alcohol?

      --

      The AACS key is NOT 0xF606EEFD628B1CA427BEA93A9CA9773F
    3. Re:(this joke will appear a thousand times) by Oktober+Sunset · · Score: 4, Funny

      The days of launching chimps into space are long over.

    4. Re:(this joke will appear a thousand times) by eniac42 · · Score: 2, Insightful

      Must not care about frittering valuable resources away on pointless flag-waving exercises to keep the pork-hungry defence industry and adolescent males (of all ages) happy that the world of Star Trek is only a matter of working out the engineering.Or as the Register just put it: Nobel-winning boffin slams ISS, manned spaceflight 'Infantile fixation on putting people into space'

      There is something in that - certainly the Shuttle & ISS have been very poor value for money. It would have been way better to just keep Apollo going (maybe on a slower budget). Skylab was already going and there were full-on lunar bases ready-to-go based on Apollo hardware - and if rolled out slowly, for far less money/year than the Shuttle/ISS boondongle..

      There is real science that could be done still by a manned lunar/mars base - but yes, sending a $1 billion-a-throw Shuttle up so we can run school-science-fair experiments on a $100 billion ISS doesnt really cut it. At this time, just setting up X-prize type funds seems the cheapest way to push development..

      --
      "A nation that forgets its past is doomed to repeat it." - Churchill
    5. Re:(this joke will appear a thousand times) by phulegart · · Score: 4, Insightful

      So going from one cave to the next is ok. Going from one house to the next is ok. Going from one city to the next is ok. Going from one continent to the next is ok. But work toward going from one planet to another... HELL NO???

      If you have a better plan than the one in action involving space stations and the craft they are using (poorly) to make this happen, then by all means, put it into action. Otherwise, shut up. It's not like private enterprise isn't getting involved. It is. If you are one of those people who thinks that the development of the bicycle, the automobile, the boat, and the plane were all great ideas, but we should stop when crossing the boundary of space, stick with living in the basement.

      I'm holding out for the security guard position on a space station.

      --
      "I love deadlines. I love the whooshing sound they make as they fly by." -D. Adams
    6. Re:(this joke will appear a thousand times) by jamstar7 · · Score: 2, Funny

      Yeah, John Glenn already had his second ride.

      --
      Understanding the scope of the problem is the first step on the path to true panic.
  2. height discrimination! by syrinx · · Score: 2, Funny

    Must be a U.S. citizen between 5-foot-2 and 6-foot-3 in height

    As a 6'4" person (that's 0.384 rods for those of you not used to measuring in feet!), I think I am going to sue for height discrimination.

    First I find out that government safety regulations in cars only apply to people 6'3" and under, and now this...

    --
    Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum sonatur.
    1. Re:height discrimination! by UbuntuDupe · · Score: 3, Informative

      It's not discrimination because you need to be under a certain height in order to fit through certain passage ways and into certain rooms. Since that requirement is objectively tied to be ability to perform the job, it cannot count as discrimination to place that height maximum as a requirement.

      This is just like how it's absolutely impossible to do any kind of engineering-related task whatsoever without a 4-year degree from an accredited engineering program, and therefore employers are 100% justified in making that a requirement for engineering jobs and why it's not discrimination and is legal under the ADA and relevant employment law. [/can't say with straight face]

    2. Re:height discrimination! by sgt+scrub · · Score: 2, Funny

      I TOTALLY Agree! I'm a short, fat, balding, middle age, heavy drinker and smoker AND they won't even take ME! I mean WTF!

      --
      Having to work for a living is the root of all evil.
    3. Re:height discrimination! by zerocool^ · · Score: 2, Funny


      I TOTALLY Agree! I'm a short, fat, balding, middle age, heavy drinker and smoker AND they won't even take ME! I mean WTF!

      Dad?!?!?

      --
      sig?
    4. Re:height discrimination! by Like2Byte · · Score: 2, Funny

      I TOTALLY Agree! I'm a short, {{huff}} fat, balding, middle age, {{huff}} heavy drinker and {{cough}} smoker AND they won't even take ME! {{huff, huff, huff}} I mean WTF! {{heart explodes}}


      Fixed that for you.
  3. Re:Damn it! by LiquidCoooled · · Score: 2

    I would pay myself to do it.
    Hell, I think I would give an arm and a leg willingly to do it (lower weight, more chance I can get a seat)

    --
    liqbase :: faster than paper
  4. Re:Damn it! by morgan_greywolf · · Score: 4, Interesting

    And just what constitutes 'relevant professional experience.'? Most NASA astronauts retire from NASA. Where are these experienced astronauts going to come from? Former Soviet Bloc countries?

  5. One-way or two-way missions? by nmg196 · · Score: 3, Funny

    If the missions are one-way, I think my boss would be an excellent candidate. I'll even fill out his application for him.

    1. Re:One-way or two-way missions? by Sparr0 · · Score: 4, Interesting

      An interesting philosophical question that I have posed in the past... Would you take a one-way trip to Mars? You get to be the first person to ever set foot on the red planet, your family is generously rewarded, and you take a suicide pill N months after landing when your food supplies run out.

    2. Re:One-way or two-way missions? by IceCreamGuy · · Score: 5, Interesting

      I have actually specifically told my friends when it's come up in conversation that if, somehow, I was approached by NASA and they told me that I could got to Mars, that I would never be coming back, that I would die there, and that I would never see my friends and family again, and I had to leave right now with no time to say goodbye or get any of my things, I would absolutely do it, no questions asked. People have told me that's a stupid thing to think, or that I'm a jerk because I would leave everyone I know so quickly, but that's just the way it is. If I could go to outer space, my life's meaning would change so drastically that it wouldn't even be worth it to think in those terms to me, and I think to my friends and family as well. -Julius

    3. Re:One-way or two-way missions? by IndustrialComplex · · Score: 2, Insightful

      What would be the point. To be the first person on Mars? I don't see that the rush to get a person on Mars needs to be so great that we consider a suicide trip. Mars isn't going anywhere in the next 50 years. I'd wager that anything we can find there, we could still find in 1000 years.

      It is one thing to consider a suicide mission that has some lifesaving purpose, but throwing lives away for a feather in your cap isn't worth it. It is definately not worth it when simple restraint and patience will result in an even more successful outcome:

      A manned mission to Mars and a return trip.

      --
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    4. Re:One-way or two-way missions? by Penguinisto · · Score: 3, Insightful
      A guaranteed suicide mission would be worthless on a personal level (unless I had, say, terminal cancer or somesuch, then I'd certainly be game), but more importantly, it would be worthless on a political level. You don't send folks up to die, because the whole point of the exercise is two-fold:

      1) science / exploration

      2) getting ordinary folks to think "hey - that could be me/my kids up there someday! Cool!"

      The reason the Space Race was so popular in the '50s and '60s wasn't so much the 'Red Menace', but ordinary folks (kids chief among them) to fantasize about being spacemen and spacewomen. SciFi was a HUGE factor in having folks dream of space as a destination in the first place.

      Sure, the odds of, say, terraforming Mars in my lifetime is pretty much nil, but the ideas of adventure and exploration? Especially in a world that pretty much has had human eyes hovering over nearly every square hectare of it by now? It's a pretty damned cool idea.

      /P

      --
      Quo usque tandem abutere, Nimbus, patientia nostra?
    5. Re:One-way or two-way missions? by Eponymous+Bastard · · Score: 2, Interesting

      and you take a suicide pill N months after landing when your food supplies run out.

      On those terms, no. If on the other hand you were to say: "and you take a suicide pill N months after landing if your food supplies run out." I'd do it. In a heartbeat. (Ok, I'd evaluate the mission first to see if that "if" is reasonable).

      Trying to establish a permanent colony on Mars would be worth it, I think. Being part of the pioneering group, facing challenges, working on something important and influential. Hell Yes, I'd try it. Going just so some government can claim that "they" were the first to put a man on mars, no.

      Having to take a suicide pill if all of our agricultural work fails, it should be a small risk compared to a micrometeorite strike, solar flare, orbital insertion failure, or once in mars, structural failure of the shelter, medical problems with regolith/mars dust, etc. I wouldn't like to depend on continued shipments from earth either

      The hardest part would be the lag. No beer and no internet make Eponymous something something...

    6. Re:One-way or two-way missions? by Chapter80 · · Score: 2, Insightful
      "Being born" is a suicide mission. When you were in the womb, if someone said to you, "If you go out there, you are going to eventually die," (which is true), would you choose to be born anyway? If you stay in the safe womb, presumably you'd eventually die. If you go out, you'll eventually die.

      What's different about Mars? The original post didn't say the food would run out in less than 100 years.

    7. Re:One-way or two-way missions? by IndustrialComplex · · Score: 2, Funny

      Then again, what the hell am I going to do on Mars for 100 years? Unless there's slashdot.
      But the latency would be terrible ;)

      Heh, which was kind of my point. It would have to be a pretty necessary mission to require a one way trip to Mars.

      Though there are some interesting things you could do on Mars if you were there, by yourself, for 100 years. For instance, you could go check out what is under that rock... or that other rock... Make some footprints in the dust, that could be fun.

      My goal would probably be to go moderately insane, and send back messages of how I had organized the Martian populace and warned them about the intentions of Earth.

      --
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    8. Re:One-way or two-way missions? by yet+another+coward · · Score: 2, Interesting

      It is strange how averse many people are to the idea. I know of specific ancestors who boarded ships with vague notions of their destination and slim possibilities for return. Many families have similar stories.

      Considering that only a small fraction of humans live in central eastern Africa or wherever humans originated, leaving home to seek new lands with little hope of return is a historically common event. Of course, nobody yet has set out for a barren world many millions of miles away, but many have faced daunting journeys and long odds.

  6. I wouldn't... by tryfan · · Score: 3, Funny

    leave my job at Stargate Command for this!

  7. Here's my chance by pak9rabid · · Score: 4, Funny

    Here's my chance to show up that smug Inanimate Carbon Rod.

  8. Re:I qualify by Aardpig · · Score: 3, Insightful

    No, I'm sorry, they wanted a degree in engineering, math or science.

    --
    Tubal-Cain smokes the white owl.
  9. Re:Damn it! by click2005 · · Score: 4, Funny

    I've watched every episode of Star Trek, Stargate and Lost in Space. I'm sure that qualifies as experience.

    --
    I am a free slashdotter. I will not be modded, blogged, DRM'd, patented, podcasted or RFID'd. My life is my own.
  10. Curious about the vision requirement. by IndustrialComplex · · Score: 2, Insightful

    I'm a bit curious about the vision requirement. While I understand the need for good vision, what is the need for 20/20? The real work of flying the craft is usually left up to computers, and I'm not sure of what tasks couldn't be performed with adequate vision. I suppose one could argue about the docking operations with the ISS...

    Of course I may be coming at this from the wrong angle. Vision that isn't correctable to 20/20 is probably pretty bad to start.

    --
    Out of modpoints but really liked a post? 1BDkF6TtmmeZ3yqXbz9yhdYVqRYnwFoXDj
    1. Re:Curious about the vision requirement. by sconeu · · Score: 2, Informative

      I seem to recall a shot of John Young at the controls of STS-1, wearing his reading glasses.

      Yep. Here it is.

      --
      General Relativity: Space-time tells matter where to go; Matter tells space-time what shape to be.
  11. Salary by dlhm · · Score: 3, Funny

    The Salary kind of sucks for being strapped to a bomb....

    --
    Ad eundum quo nemo ante iit!
    1. Re:Salary by EnsilZah · · Score: 2, Funny

      I live in Israel, people in this area do it for a much lower salary and much higher chances of successful detonation.

  12. Re:Damn it! by UbuntuDupe · · Score: 2, Interesting

    Economists refer to the additional amount you must pay someone to take on unpleasant work, compared to work requiring similar skills, as the "compensating differential". For astronauts, that compensating differential is negative, because people find it thrilling to work as an astronaut and demand less than they ordinarily would.

    Of course, that should mean that under US tax law, the amount people would pay to be an astronaut counts as imputed income on top of the 60k salary, and therefore should be taxed, but whatever.

    (Btw, I think someone commented a while ago that NASA used to have a warning that said something like, "If you want to be an astronaut for the money, don't bother. If you just want a lot of money, go work for a NASA contractor.")

  13. Re:Damn it! by Billosaur · · Score: 4, Informative

    I don't think a Psych degree counts... so I'm out of the running; I won't even belabor the fact that I'm not in any kind of shape for it. And no, $60K isn't a lot considering the work an astronaut does. Most astronauts spend their lives trying to make money other ways, with mixed results. The Mercury 7 were blessed in the beginning by having their exclusive contract with Life magazine that supplemented their income, and due to their fame, they received more than their fair share of perks. I don't think astronauts today have it quite so good, which is a shame.

    --
    GetOuttaMySpace - The Anti-Social Network
  14. Where's my penis shaped ship? by monkeyboythom · · Score: 2, Funny

    Great. I have this sneaky suspicion that this cattle call will end up as network reality show contest.

  15. Re:What about Color Blindess? by Hanners1979 · · Score: 2, Funny

    Anyways, it would be nice if NASA allowed Color Blind people to also fly and become astronauts.

    It would be nice until they ask you to press the green 'launch' button, and you press the red 'self-destruct' button instead. ;)

    (P.S. I'm colour-blind myself, so I figure I'm allowed to make bad jokes like that)

  16. Re:Damn it! by dougmc · · Score: 3, Interesting

    And just what constitutes 'relevant professional experience.'? Well, just look at what most astronauts over the years did before becoming astronauts. I seem to recall a lot of military pilots doing it, for example.

    Though my guess is that they're less looking for `Top Gun' types of guys and more for the brainy scientist guys -- but guys who are physically fit too. And so relevant professional experience would probably mean doing brainy scientist sorts of things. I imagine the military still has a lot of people like this ...

    Though in general, if you want a job, apply -- even if you don't fit all their qualifications exactly. I doubt this is any different -- though I imagine that they won't be hiring many people who merely have bachelors degrees. I'd expect them to pick PhDs instead. Especially if I'm right about the sort of people they want.

  17. Re:So why the degree req'mt? by mcmonkey · · Score: 5, Funny

    Why not instead start hiring ironworkers and folks who actually know WTF they're doing in high-up construction techniques? They're still (according to accounts) building the ISS, right?

    Maybe because this is the real-world NASA and not a Ben Afflec movie?

  18. Re:Damn it! by trolltalk.com · · Score: 3, Funny

    "I've watched every episode of Star Trek, Stargate and Lost in Space. I'm sure that qualifies as experience."

    Stargate takes away points. You need stuff with real rocket science, so you'll know what someone means when they say "They've gone plaid!"

  19. Suggestions by Overzeetop · · Score: 4, Informative

    Get a PhD
    Get your private pilots license
    Get certified in Scuba
    Run 10 miles a day, be in good physical shape
    Make sure you are comfortable speaking in public, and are fairly good at it
    Have diverse interests

    Now you've met the real minimum requirements...go have fun!

    FFWIW, I considered being an as-can, and know others who were attempting to get selected. Getting into the NBA is a bit easier than getting into to be an astronaut, statistically speaking.

    --
    Is it just my observation, or are there way too many stupid people in the world?
  20. "Mission control.. by Rob+T+Firefly · · Score: 2, Funny

    ..I regret to inform you that our manned expedition to the Red Planet Mars has encountered a slight difficulty.."

  21. Re:Damn it! by IndustrialComplex · · Score: 2, Insightful

    If you are interested, I wouldn't discount any degree. Especially one in Psychology. With all this talk of extended missions, having an onboard psychologist might not be too far fetched.

    --
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  22. Finally! by rengav · · Score: 2, Interesting
    From the www.usajobs.gov site:

    ASTRONAUT CANDIDATE (NON-PILOTING BACKGROUND): 1. Bachelor's degree from an accredited institution in engineering, biological science, physical science, or mathematics. Quality of academic preparation is important. Degree must be followed by at least 3 years of related, progressively responsible, professional experience. An advanced degree is desirable and may be substituted for experience as follows: master's degree = 1 year of experience, doctoral degree = 3 years of experience. Teaching experience, including experience at the K - 12 levels, is considered to be qualifying experience for the Astronaut Candidate position; therefore, educators are encouraged to apply.
    I'm really glad to see that teaching experience is being considered "real" job experience for once. Looking at all the minimum qualifications, with 7 years of K-12 teaching, I qualify. I'm going to apply. Who knows, I might get lucky. Wish me luck!
  23. Astronaut? Yes; Go into space? No by sircastor · · Score: 5, Informative

    On a radio show called "This American Life", the host Ira Glass interviewed a couple of Astronauts which revealed that most astronauts haven't been in space, and many aren't even scheduled for a flight. So if you enjoy meetings and lots of paperwork, sign up. Yes it gives you a chance to get into space (better than us normal ground-dwellers), but frankly, this isn't the dream that most want it to be.

  24. Re:Damn it! by Billosaur · · Score: 2, Insightful

    True, but astronauts are notoriously wary of doctors and psychologists, because they are the two people whose office you can walk into an astronaut and walk out grounded. And can you imagine being a psych specialist on a Mars mission, being cooped up with the crew for 90+ days, them knowing part of your job is to evaluate their mental state? Of course you'd have to have other functions, because the cost of a Mars mission will be high enough that no one will be able to justify the cost of sending a psychologist along solely to monitor the crew.

    --
    GetOuttaMySpace - The Anti-Social Network
  25. Re:Damn it! by IndustrialComplex · · Score: 4, Funny

    Day 45: All he does is write in that little notebook. Why Why Why who. No. ...

    Day 75: I think Dr. Evers knows about my connection with the galactic federal space donkeys. Operation F. Y. C. may have to be accelerated. ...

    Day 83: Mishnog's suggestion to use the vacuum of space to preserve the meat was a success!

    --
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  26. Re:So why the degree req'mt? by Jason+Levine · · Score: 2, Informative

    Why not instead start hiring ironworkers and folks who actually know WTF they're doing in high-up construction techniques?

    Possibly because "high-up construction techniques" typically involve heights at which gravity is still a major factor and air supply isn't. If you're not careful when building out on the 50th floor, you'll fall to your death rather quickly. You don't typically need anything special to breathe, though.

    Much of the building of the ISS takes place on the ground and the space shuttles just deploy the pieces. When the pieces are put together "high-up", the workers don't so much need to worry about falling as they need to worry about suit punctures, navigating in zero-G, drifting away from the site, etc. Stick an iron-worker in a suit in space and he won't know how to connect two pieces of the ISS together. He won't know to be careful of each screw lest it puncture his suit. He won't know half of the things that the astronauts know to stay safe and keep from getting himself killed.
    --
    My sci-fi novel, Ghost Thief, is now available from Amazon.com.
  27. Re:Damn it! by malilo · · Score: 3, Insightful

    Though my guess is that they're less looking for `Top Gun' types of guys and more for the brainy scientist guys -- but guys who are physically fit too. I'm getting a phD in astrophysics and I compete in triathlons... But I'm not a guy ;)
    --
    "sometimes he felt that his whole life was a dream, and he wondered whose it was and whether they were enjoying it."