Slashdot Mirror
Dvorak Says gPhone is Doomed
drewmoney writes "Speaking with his usual frustrated crankiness John Dvorak rants his way through an article explaining why the gPhone will never work. 'First of all, it wants to put Google search on a phone. It wants to do this because it is obvious to the folks at Google that people need to do Web searches from their phone, so they can, uh, get directions to the restaurant? Of course, they can simply use the phone itself to call the restaurant and ask! I've actually used various phones with Web capability. They never work right. They take forever to navigate. It's hard to read the screens ... I also hope that people note the fact that the public has not been flocking to smartphones of any sort.' "
So it's a guaranteed success then?
Man, ever since he came out with that keyboard, he's a know it all.
How about
'Dvork'
'Dveeb'
'Dvumb'
'Dvick'
or just simply
Dvorak?
There are two types of people in the world: Those who crave closure
Some people love attention and once they get it will rattle off whatever is on their minds. Other people (media) will actually record these ramblings and present them as news in the hopes others will read their content, then flip to the ads and give business to one of their advertisers.
Worst of all, onece it makes it to slashdot, someone will do this:
In Soviet Russia phone dooms YOU!
And hopefully that's were it all ends, but you never know, it may be picked up by 60 minutes or 20/20 and go on from there.
A feeling of having made the same mistake before: Deja Foobar
It's scary how much this:
"First of all, it wants to put Google search on a phone. It wants to do this because it is obvious to the folks at Google that people need to do Web searches from their phone, so they can, uh, get directions to the restaurant? Of course, they can simply use the phone itself to call the restaurant and ask!"
Sounds like the parody I did of Dvorak a while back:
"Starbucks needs drive-up windows because they are planning to bring that same environment to your vehicle! That's right, Starbucks wants to give you that same coffee-saturated, easy listening, comfortable seating feeling you get in their stores, but in your car. [...] Starbucks is going to make cars."
Javascript + Nintendo DSi = DSiCade
He gets paid to make ridiculous, outrageous and often times completely asinine claims based on speculation for the purpose of attracting viewers so ads can be sold.
In other words, he's somewhere between Fox News and World Wrestling Entertainment.
-kgj
-kgj