Slashdot Mirror
Beamed Sonic Advertising Is Coming
newtley writes in with a story from Ad Age a few days back. "Advertisers are determined to get into your head by one means or another, and Holosonic Research Labs has found yet another way of invading your privacy in the name of forcing you pay attention. You're walking down a street in New York when all of a sudden, a woman's voice whispers 'Who's that? Who's There?' No, you weren't having a psychotic episode; you were being subjected without your permission to 'sound in a narrow beam, just like light.' It was coming at you from a rooftop speaker seven stories up."
AHA! We all knew it. We saw it coming. They laughed at us yes... YES!! Well, now THEY'LL be the ones to laugh at... ahhhhahhhahahahahhahhahaa!
Tinfoil hat brethren, I say we unite and add tinfoil earmuffs to the wardrobe. NAY!! The WHOLE wardrobe must be tinfoil. Only then will you be SAFE FROM THIS INVASION!!
VINDICATION IS SO SWEET!!
I got a catholic block.
How long until everyone starts hearing THAT while walking down the street?
Hear recorded Slashdot headlines on your phone! New service beta testing. Just call (248) 434-5508
Lightspeed briefs, style and comfort for the discriminating crotch!!
http://greenobyl.com/ please.... think of the children!!
Imagine if a group of atheists put one of these devices near the entrance to a church. They could beam messages to the congregation as they enter and leave the church. Imagine the outburst that messages such as, "This is God. Intelligent Design is for retards." and "This is God. I know you touch yourself." would lead to!
Yeah, these technologies ARE pretty obnoxious. All day long when I walk up and down the street, I'm getting voices in my ear and they just won't stop. I've got Safeway telling me about specials in their frozen foods section. Starbucks is telling me to buy their Cappucino. And Home Depot is constantly telling me that I've got to get a high powered rifle and take out the governor's dog so I can impress Jodi Foster, and do it NOW, NOW, NOW! And I've TRIED to make them stop, but no matter how many home improvement projects I start, Home Depot just will not relent!
It got so bad that until I read this story, I was beginning to doubt my own sanity.
The real Ralph Yarro posts as Anonymous Coward. Anyone else is an impostor.
baseball bat and trash the device into pieces.
You will not use the bat, you will not use the bat, you will not...
Table-ized A.I.
If you're in New York City, then you're already fucked.
"He who can destroy a thing, controls a thing." --Paul Atreides, Dune
"I'm not sure, I couldn't stop thinking about how the pastor would look in some Lightspeed Briefs ..."
Shift happens. Fire it up.
Leela: Didn't you have ads in the 20th century?
Fry: Well, sure, but not in our dreams. Only on TV and radio. And in magazines and movies and at ball games and on buses and milk cartons and T-shirts and written in the sky. But not in dreams. No, sir-ee!
(link)
I had but a simple dream, to destroy all humans.
Hmmm, looks like I'll be able to now 'accesorize' my tin foil hat, with some nifty new tin foil ear plugs!!
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.........
Or, by targeting the microphone itself, just speak directly to their audience?
Better yet -- beam the pol's words back into his head with something like a tenth of a second delay. It would turn him instantly into a jibbering idiot.
Anyone who has ever been on a long distance phone line when the echo suppressors aren't working will immediately recognize the effect. It's simply impossible to continue speaking coherently.
I have this amazing technique to avoid getting hit by trucks. I look before I step into the street.
-jcr
The only title of honor that a tyrant can grant is "Enemy of the State."
Leela: Didn't you have ads in the 20th century?
Fry: Well, sure, but not in our dreams. Only on TV and radio. And in magazines and movies and at ball games and on buses and milk cartons and T-shirts and written in the sky. But not in dreams. No, sir-ee!
Saying your "phone ran out of batteries" is like saying your "car ran out of gas tanks".
If you're on the street and I stand 5 feet away and say, "hey buddy, got the time?" and you punch me in the face -
Ah, so you've visited Scotland, then?
Indeed... I love drunken Scots, they remind me of sober Scots, and they all sound like Dwarves, but taller.
Seriously, Scots are a fun bunch, whenever they're not busy trying to kiss up to international corporations or the British Crown.
" What luck for rulers that men do not think" - Adolf Hitler
Imagine if a group of atheists put one of these devices near the entrance to a church.
or outside the entrance to a rave/new age club.
"Yo...you with the black fingernails. This is God. I do, in fact, exist."
"And you will continue to hear this message until you take your narrow ass to church."
That would be almost as fun as sitting in a strip club with a miniature version & beaming a manly voice into the ear of a guy getting a lapdance as she leans over to see if he wants to go up stairs.
Wanna fight ? Bend over, stick your head up your ass, and fight for air.
Make up your own jingle and sing it to the cashier every time you go and pay? Quid pro Quo......