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Wired's 2007 Vaporware Awards

Posted by kdawson on from the you-say-vapor-i-say-hot-air dept.

Braedley sends word that Wired's annual vaporware list is up, and a number of products this community has discussed made the cut. The top spot, the position of most dishonor, was almost a foregone conclusion. "Another December, another list, another crowning achievement by the Emperor of the Ethereal, the Head Honcho of Hype, Duke Nukem Forever. We were going to disqualify him out of pity, but Sir Duke is back for 2007 thanks to a few leaked screenshots and an overwhelming number of votes. DNF creators 3D Realms even chose this week to debut a well-publicized video trailer for Duke's long-awaited return. Alas, a trailer is not a game, so — long live the king!"

12 of 195 comments (clear)

  1. Diablo III by Uthic · · Score: 5, Informative

    I don't see how this is so much 'vaporware' as 'what people would really like'. Blizzard hasn't made an announcement or even a hint that they're making it, after all. And boy, do I hate seeing the list one item at a time.

  2. Diablo III? by cenice · · Score: 5, Insightful

    How can an unannounced product be vaporware?

  3. GNR? by TofuMatt · · Score: 5, Funny

    Chinese Democracy has been vaporware for what, eight years now? And is anyone really looking forward to it anyway?

    --
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    1. Re:GNR? by darkrowan · · Score: 5, Funny

      The way that album is going, China *WILL* be a democracy when it is finally released.

      --
      AccountKiller
  4. I didn't see Vista onthe list by richardkelleher · · Score: 5, Funny

    Just because they shipped it, doesn't mean it is still not vapor. Microsoft has been proving this for years.

  5. Re:Duke Nukem Forever is in beta by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    My GFs brothers mail carrier has a neighbor... Her nannies geeky half cousin (twice removed) says that his boy who is 'deep in the scene' (As he put it) talked to the aunt of one of the programmers mom who says that it won't be ready until at least December. Guess you need to recheck your insider.

  6. I for one by edittard · · Score: 5, Funny

    I nominate slashdot's new discussion system.

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    At the bottom of the /. main page it says 'Yesterday's News'. Well they got that right.
    1. Re:I for one by jdjbuffalo · · Score: 5, Insightful

      I would be nice to see some changes to it. I was using it for several months until they changed it to display only 50 messages at once. I couldn't stand pressing the "More" button 10 times per story so I stopped using it.

      I really don't like the old system after using the new one but I can't stand the 50 message limit. They should make the "50" be adjustable to include 50,100,200,300,400,500,unlimited. While there was certainly problems with their Javascript timing out for big threads it wasn't too bad most of the time. They certainly still have work to do to optimize the code but the adjustable number of messages feature would certainly help in the mean time.

      Hopefully the Taco will see this message and make the adjustment ;-)

      --
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  7. Good marketing ploy? by Bananatree3 · · Score: 5, Insightful
    1)Create Duke Nukem
    2)Make big fuss over sequal
    3)Don't deliver, but make big deal for next decade
    4)Once DNF is a household name, deliver
    5)Profit!!

    Seriously though, 3D Realms has found a good formula to get its namebrand out. I mean, what gamer hasn't heard of Duke Nukem Forever? It's the most famous non-game in gaming history. Weight for weight, DNF has more name recognition than even probably Halo. It almost behooves them to release it. It will turn every gamer's head 180 with "WTF?! DNF is finally been released!". Even if the game is say 7/10, you can guerentee a lot of copies would be sold just out of name recognition alone.



    1. Re:Good marketing ploy? by crymeph0 · · Score: 5, Funny

      Unless they fuck up something fundamental, you cannot spend a decade working on something to have something so-so at the end.

      Absolutely you can. It's called feature creep, and if left unchecked, not only do you end up with a pig in a dress. You end up with a pig in a bullet-proof dress with wader boots on each hoof, only the hooves have been replaced with knives, so you had to install a sheathing mechanism for the hoof-knives, which requires a motor buried in the pig's ass.

      Then when you deliver the pig to the farmer he's like, "How the hell am I supposed to make bacon out of this pig if it's able to fight back with its hoof-knives, and I can't shoot it because of the bullet-proof dress? And the motor is leaking grease all over the ham meat!"

      Now, would you buy that pig?

      --
      It should be illegal to say that freedom of speech should be limited.
    2. Re:Good marketing ploy? by Kyokushi · · Score: 5, Funny

      Are we talking about Vista here?

  8. Re:All I can say is by teknopurge · · Score: 5, Funny

    you mean Jon St. John.

    Kidding aside, everything from that trailer is using the in-game engine. Everything. zero CGI. I don't think people realize this.

    You new fruity console lovers can keep your Master Chef and his queer-eye costume. His food sucks and the only thing he has is a decent story-line. I'll take Duke, a shotgun, pipe bombs and strippers any day of the week.

    Jetpack with pipebombs - the absolute best way to make your opponents squeal like babies.

    Run child, run for your life.....

    He's coming in '08 to kick some ass and chew some bubblegum, and I took his last piece of gum.

    Regards,

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