Slashdot Mirror
Universe May Be Running Out of Time
RenHoek writes "With heat death, the big crunch and quite a few other nasty ways in which the universe could see its demise, we can now add "running out of time" to the list. A team of scientists came up with a new theory that would solve the problem of the elusive dark energy that seems to be accelerating the expansion of the universe. They figure that the universe is not speeding up but we are, in relation to the outer regions of space, slowing down. Tests with the upcoming Large Hadron Collider will give more insight if we're going to end up frozen in time."
Ha, you only think this is offtopic!
... to book at Milliways !!!
CC.
TaijiQuan (Huang, 5 loosenings)
With heat death, the big crunch and quite a few other nasty ways in which the universe could see its demise, we can now add "running out of time" to the list.
Sorry, it's the Holidays getting me down.
I prefer Flambe as apposed flamebait.
It's our time. We needs more of it. I suppose we could try a time transplant.
As long as we figure out if Pat is a man or a woman before time stops, I am content.
Mr. Gore, have you been submitting stories to slashdot again?
Ms. Cartman: Doctor, did you find out what's wrong with him?
Doctor: I'm afraid he's running out of time.
Ms. Cartman: Why, what's wrong with him?
Doctor: It's his time. It's running out.
Ms. Cartman: What can we do?
Doctor: Well, I suppose we can try a time transplant. I'll have to call a specialist.
is this further evidence that we're approaching a black hole? The whole, unverse appears to be accelerating away from us in all directions thing?
kinda freakin' me out here people, if time slows down too much, it'll be 2:45 Friday afternoon forever!
I believe this announcement should be taken as a wake up call by the Duke Nukem Forever developers. I'm standing by to place my order while the cosmos collapses around me.
... "Time Traveler's Handbook of 1001 Tense Formations"
Fear, long time (relative) slashdotter gets a girl, starts a family and then time stops!
Great! Just Great!
My daughter is due early May 2008... not sure what would be worse.. my wife stuck forever pregnant, baby (diapers), or her as a teenager!
I only look human.
My mother is a halfling and my dad is an ogre, so that makes me an Ogreling
Cannot run out of time. There is infinite time. You are finite. Zathras is finite. This... is wrong tool. [rummaging] No, not good. Not good. No. No-- never use this!
Oh, say does that Star-Spangled Banner entwine / The myrtle of Venus with Bacchus's vine?
We can only hope.
Zathras: "Cannot run out of time. Time is infinite. You, are finite. Zathras if finite. This.... is wrong tool."
Poor means hoping the toothache goes away.
Come on, really now. It came from the Flying Spagetti Monster. Heathen.
I always seem to read Large Hadron Collider as "Large Hardon Collider." Not sure how that's related to science.
Hey! Someday he will save the world from immanent destruction and even you will say "Thank you Al Gore! You're super awesome!"
The game.
Let's all concentrate on making a big red cloud around the world, then we can remove ourselves from this universe all together!
The problem with TFA is that it makes little logical sense. In what possible sense can time be "slowing down?" "Slowing down" is a statement that something is changing less per unit time. If you like, that dx/dt is negative. I'm sure the physics makes sense, but the language in this news article does not. If anyone knows what the actual science is, I at least would be grateful for a better explanation than this news article provides. Anyone?
Try to visualize this using kettles. The easiest way to slow the progress of time is to watch a kettle while it boils. If that analogy doesn't work for you, you can get a similar effect by boiling an egg or visiting a proctologist.
In order to replicate the study, you start with a single kettle (today) and then progressively add more kettles until the universe is composed entirely of kettles boiling water (end time). Kettles all the way down, as it were.
When you have nothing left to burn you must set yourself on fire
Silly person, this is all a result of George Bush's efforts to accelerate global warming by increasing the profits of his Big Oil buddies, by pushing to reach Peak Oil and cause a global recession!
Oh, say does that Star-Spangled Banner entwine / The myrtle of Venus with Bacchus's vine?
Clearly, this is a wake-up call for the Universe. Our dependency on time must not continue if we are to survive. Contact your President, your Prime Minister, all of your representatives and demand investigations into alternative time resources.
Perhaps something corn-based.
Those who believe the Internet is private,
find their privates are on the Internet.
Their calculations are off because they are educated to be evil, and fail to appreciate that each day is actually four days long!.
When you account for this 1:4 ratio, the extra dark energy drops out of the equations, and the universe does not collapse into an academic singularity, but into four nodes, two major and two minor! The academic community will not teach this because it is brainwashing.
(Actually, I just really want this story to have the Time Cube metatag.)
The good and new comes from no quarter where it is looked for, and is always something different from what is expected.
They figure that the universe is not speeding up but we are, in relation to the outer regions of space, slowing down. Tests ... will give more insight if we're going to end up frozen in time.
Come on now, that's utterly ridicuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
Table-ized A.I.
Blasphemer! Cheese be upon him!!
Xenon, where's my money? -Borno
I searched a little and found a little more information about Alan on this web site http://www.ldolphin.org/cdkgal.html
http://www.icr.org/index.php?module=articles&action=view&ID=283