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Men Willing to Give up Sex for a 50in TV

Posted by ScuttleMonkey on from the tough-choices dept.

Active Seti writes "The NY Times reports that nearly half of British men surveyed would give up sex for six months in return for a 50-inch plasma TV. The firm found 47 percent of men would give up sex for half a year, compared to just over a third of women. 'It seems that size really does matter more for men than women,' the firm said. The survey also said a quarter of people would give up smoking, with roughly the same proportion willing to give up chocolate which could make buying a plasma TV a good alternative to programs for smoking cessation or weight loss. Of course the survey should be taken with a grain of salt since it was carried out for a firm selling televisions."

25 of 139 comments (clear)

  1. Sounds crazy until... by Hatta · · Score: 5, Funny

    You realize they'd be giving up sex with a British housewife. I can see how the TV would be more appealing.

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    1. Re:Sounds crazy until... by spun · · Score: 2, Funny

      There's some nice looking Brits, contrary to popular opinion. The more important point is that they would be giving up British sex. From what I hear, it's not nearly as good as regular sex. :-P

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    2. Re:Sounds crazy until... by my+$anity++0 · · Score: 5, Funny

      No, don't you get it?
      If you have sex in Britain, you have sex in REAL LIFE.

    3. Re:Sounds crazy until... by tristian_was_here · · Score: 5, Funny

      You realize they'd be giving up sex with a British housewife. I can see how the TV would be more appealing. I think most men on this website would give up something they have never had so thats about 80% of em' (all calculations made with Excel).
    4. Re:Sounds crazy until... by Dahan · · Score: 4, Funny

      Depends; does the woman they're giving up sex with look like the young one or the old one on Are You Being Served? I, for one, would be delighted to keep an eye on Mrs. Slocombe's pussy.
    5. Re:Sounds crazy until... by Molochi · · Score: 5, Funny

      Harry Blackitt: Look at them, bloody Catholics, filling the bloody world up with bloody people they can't afford to bloody feed.
      Mrs. Blackitt: What are we dear?
      Harry Blackitt: Protestant, and fiercely proud of it.
      Mrs. Blackitt: Hmm. Well, why do they have so many children?
      Harry Blackitt: Because... every time they have sexual intercourse, they have to have a baby.
      Mrs. Blackitt: But it's the same with us, Harry.
      Harry Blackitt: What do you mean?
      Mrs. Blackitt: Well, I mean, we've got two children, and we've had sexual intercourse twice.
      Harry Blackitt: That's not the point. We could have it any time we wanted.
      Mrs. Blackitt: Really?
      Harry Blackitt: Oh, yes, and, what's more, because we don't believe in all that Papist claptrap, we can take precautions.
      Mrs. Blackitt: What, you mean... lock the door?
      Harry Blackitt: No, no. I mean, because we are members of the Protestant Reformed Church, which successfully challenged the autocratic power of the Papacy in the mid-sixteenth century, we can wear little rubber devices to prevent issue.
      Mrs. Blackitt: What d'you mean?
      Harry Blackitt: I could, if I wanted, have sexual intercourse with you...
      Mrs. Blackitt: Oh, yes, Harry.
      Harry Blackitt: ...and, by wearing a rubber sheath over my old feller, I could insure... that, when I came off, you would not be impregnated.
      Mrs. Blackitt: Ooh.
      Harry Blackitt: That's what being a Protestant's all about. That's why it's the church for me. That's why it's the church for anyone who respects the individual and the individual's right to decide for him or herself. When Martin Luther nailed his protest up to the church door in fifteen-seventeen, he may not have realised the full significance of what he was doing, but four hundred years later, thanks to him, my dear, I can wear whatever I want on my John Thomas...
      [sniff]
      Harry Blackitt: ... and, Protestantism doesn't stop at the simple condom. Oh, no. I can wear French Ticklers if I want.
      Mrs. Blackitt: You what?
      Harry Blackitt: French Ticklers. Black Mambos. Crocodile Ribs. Sheaths that are designed not only to protect, but also to enhance the stimulation of sexual congress.
      Mrs. Blackitt: Have you got one?
      Harry Blackitt: Have I got one? Uh, well, no, but I can go down the road any time I want and walk into Harry's and hold my head up high and say in a loud, steady voice, 'Harry, I want you to sell me a condom. In fact, today, I think I'll have a French Tickler, for I am a Protestant.'
      Mrs. Blackitt: Well, why don't you?
      Harry Blackitt: But they - Well, they cannot, 'cause their church never made the great leap out of the Middle Ages and the domination of alien Episcopal supremacy.

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    6. Re:Sounds crazy until... by jollyreaper · · Score: 4, Funny

      Depends; does the woman they're giving up sex with look like the young one or the old one on Are You Being Served? I, for one, would be delighted to keep an eye on Mrs. Slocombe's pussy. Do give it up, Mr. Humphries. Nobody believes you.
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  2. A 50 inch TV? That just makes it easy by The+One+and+Only · · Score: 5, Funny

    I think I speak for nearly everyone here when I say I've given up sex for far longer than six months, and didn't even get a TV out of the deal.

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    1. Re:A 50 inch TV? That just makes it easy by snoyberg · · Score: 3, Funny

      It's called being married **ducks**

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      Thank God for evolution.
    2. Re:A 50 inch TV? That just makes it easy by athdemo · · Score: 3, Funny

      I've never willingly given it up, but I've certainly had it taken from me.

    3. Re:A 50 inch TV? That just makes it easy by level_headed_midwest · · Score: 2, Funny

      Except that you don't get a TV out of that deal...

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    4. Re:A 50 inch TV? That just makes it easy by Blimey85 · · Score: 3, Funny

      had a rough time in prison eh?

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    5. Re:A 50 inch TV? That just makes it easy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      In fact, you would have to get approval just to buy the TV with your own money.

    6. Re:A 50 inch TV? That just makes it easy by greedyturtle · · Score: 5, Funny

      I got it taken away from me for 6 months too. It was the worst day of my life, and for the bleak 6 months after, I thought many times of ending it all. I would spend hours staring at a blank wall, thinking of what I had before. Eventually the despair and self-doubt forced me to become a better man. So I hauled my sorry ass up, got a haircut, a new job and finally was able to buy myself another TV.

    7. Re:A 50 inch TV? That just makes it easy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

      Pfff, are they gonna have surveillance in *all* areas of your home? I think not.

      It's Britain ... so yes.

    8. Re:A 50 inch TV? That just makes it easy by CODiNE · · Score: 4, Funny

      Not to mention Bill Clinton's definition of sex.

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  3. Re:So what. by ccguy · · Score: 5, Funny

    I think giving up 6 months of TV for sex makes more sense to you :-)

  4. Ten Reasons Why by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    Let's see..

    1. You can turn a TV on...or off with the click of a button.
    2. You can go from sports to pr0n wit the click of a button.
    3. You can mute the TV.
    4. You can ignore the TV with no repercussions.
    5. More variety the any woman
    6. The TV will impress your friends for years and years and years.
    7. You can brag about your TV without being seen as some sexist lout.
    8. A TV can be fixed with a simple service call.
    9. If it breaks you can get a new one.
    10. Upgrading to a new TV does not involve lawyers.

  5. Re:Old news by eln · · Score: 2, Funny

    Are you trying to suggest that different sites on the Internet may cover the same stories? Madness, I say!

  6. Time Served by Purity+Of+Essence · · Score: 3, Funny

    Can I get a 50 FOOT TV for time served?

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  7. Re:I would by eln · · Score: 3, Funny

    Don't be absurd, your wife hasn't given up sex. ...oh, you mean with YOU.

  8. Re:So what. by nizo · · Score: 4, Funny

    Sadly I just realized that if I got a tv for every 6 months of no sex, I could quit my day job and open my own tv store.

    --
    I Am My Own Worst Enemy
  9. Re:So what. by adam.dorsey · · Score: 2, Funny

    And I will be your greatest competition.

    En garde, sir!

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  10. Re:So what. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Be liberal but not necessarily tasteless

    Name one liberal who's not!

  11. Re:So what. by JosKarith · · Score: 2, Funny

    "I am still a virgin. I will give undoubtfully give up six for 6 months for a 50in TV" I know you're desperate, but keep some standards. A cross-dresser with a measurement of 50 inches in any direction is just wrong...

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