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UK Police Want DNA of 'Potential Offenders'

mrogers writes "British police want to collect DNA samples from children as young as five who 'exhibit behavior indicating they may become criminals in later life'. A spokesman for the Association of Chief Police Officers argued that since some schools already take pupils' fingerprints, the collection and permanent storage of DNA samples was the logical next step. And of course, if anyone argues that branding naughty five-year-olds as lifelong criminals will stigmatize them, the proposed solution will be to take samples from all children."

13 of 578 comments (clear)

  1. Well, as Lewis Black would no doubt say ... by ScrewMaster · · Score: 1, Funny

    Unbe-fucking-lievable.

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    The higher the technology, the sharper that two-edged sword.
  2. Thats it! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    I'm moving to America! ... oh shit!

  3. If they want my DNA... by dotancohen · · Score: 5, Funny

    If they want my DNA, they can bend right over and I'll happily give it to them.

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    It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong.
    1. Re:If they want my DNA... by turgid · · Score: 4, Funny

      I wouldn't if I were you, you might catch something nasty.

  4. Who's the daddy? by clare-ents · · Score: 2, Funny

    Providing we do the parents too, the GCSE science project of 'how much dna do I share with my parents' should be awesome fun.

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    Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former. (Einstein)
  5. Re:1984 is here and now. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    Oh come on, there's no market for tin foil helmets, mostly 'cause there's no way in hell I'm trusting a store bought model. It's got to be custom built, if I don't know everything that went into it, it ain't goin' on my head, end of story.

  6. Re:1984 is here and now. by Brian+Gordon · · Score: 4, Funny

    I make my own foil personally.

  7. Servant of the people by qbzzt · · Score: 2, Funny

    Remember, the theory goes that the Government is a servant of the people, not the other way around.

    Whose theory? A bunch of rebels declaring their independence from the British government?

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    -- Support a free market in the field of government
  8. Re:And? by tubapro12 · · Score: 5, Funny

    Until you realize your neighbor is psychopathic murderer, then you're in trouble.

  9. Re:1984 is here and now. by the+eric+conspiracy · · Score: 2, Funny

    Unfortunately tin foil is very hard to find these days, and the guys at MIT proved that aluminum foil only acts as an antenna.

  10. Re:Parent needs remodding Insightful by Zencyde · · Score: 2, Funny

    You better be careful. Don't want anyone to bring up Godwin's Law. Oh... wait...

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    What day is it? Could you please tell me?
  11. Re:And? by digitig · · Score: 4, Funny

    So far, it's only "the police want". I want a hot date with Keira Knightley. What we want ain't always what we get.

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    Quidnam Latine loqui modo coepi?
  12. Re:That's it, fuck England by MadMidnightBomber · · Score: 2, Funny

    You're assuming he's Scottish? He could be from Wales, or the Republic of Yorkshire.

    --
    "It doesn't cost enough, and it makes too much sense."