Slashdot Mirror

← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)

IBM Ships Fastest CPU on Earth

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the glixchip-of-tau-alpha-ceti-still-beats-it-in-lab-tests dept.

HockeyPuck writes "The 5-billion-instructions-per second Power6 processor from IBM would beat such rivals as the 3.73 gigahertz Pentium Extreme and the 2.4 gigahertz UltraSparc T2 from Sun. 'It's hard to make the average person understand just how fast this is,' said IBM Chief Technology Officer Bernard Meyerson, offering an example meant to explain his company's baby that still leaves the listener awed with the speediness of the two laggards. 'Hold your index finger out in front of your face,' Meyerson said in a telephone interview from IBM headquarters in New York. 'In less time than it would take a beam of light to travel from your knuckle to your fingertip, the new IBM chip would complete one task and start looking for the next, he said.'"

53 of 410 comments (clear)

  1. Worst analogy EVAR! by morgan_greywolf · · Score: 5, Funny
    What's a 'task'? If you think of a 'task' for a CPU to be an instruction, then any modern desktop or notebook CPU currently in production would meet Myerson's description:

    In less time than it would take a beam of light to travel from your knuckle to your fingertip, the new IBM chip would complete one task and start looking for the next, he said
    C'mon. That's horrible. Where's BadAnalogyGuy when you need him?

    --
    My blog
    1. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by ukatoton · · Score: 5, Funny

      Is it not obvious? Myerson is BadAnalogyGuy!

    2. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      I can let one riiiiiiiiiiiiiip faster than this.

    3. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by $RANDOMLUSER · · Score: 5, Funny

      He should have said "it's so fast it'll do an infinite loop in half a second".

      --
      No folly is more costly than the folly of intolerant idealism. - Winston Churchill
    4. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 4, Funny

      So a priest, a rabbi, and a fork bomb walk into a bar...

    5. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

      So a priest, a rabbi, and a fork bomb walk into a bar...
      ...and the bartender says "what is this? some kind of joke?".
    6. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by ScriptedReplay · · Score: 5, Funny

      I think it's a neat calculation. We've all lost track of what fast actually means for a modern CPU.


      Yeah, it's a fast CPU. And it gets faster if you have smaller hands. Or if you watch your hands move by at close to the speed of light. Way cool.

      Should sell like crazy in Japan.
    7. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by GungaDan · · Score: 5, Funny

      "there probably isn't much difference between a knuckle and a wrist"

      Goatse Guy? Is that you?

      --
      Eloi are stupid, throw morlocks at them!
    8. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by joaommp · · Score: 5, Funny

      only Chuck Norris can reach the end of infinite loops. And he can do it twice.

      And then he roundhouse kicks you into oblivion.

      --
      Onda Technology Institute
    9. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by Touvan · · Score: 2, Funny

      AFAIK, only Chuck Norris is capable of doing an infinite loop that fast.

      --
      http://www.unfocus.com/
    10. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by backwardMechanic · · Score: 2, Funny

      So, if I throw my computer out of the window, I'll get more FLOPS?

    11. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      The Dalai Lama is fascinated by the analogy:

      http://graphics8.nytimes.com/images/2008/04/10/world/10lama-600.jpg

    12. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by daveime · · Score: 3, Funny

      I think the processor speed in a ZX81 was defined in arse-to-elbows per hour ;-)

    13. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by Dr+Caleb · · Score: 2, Funny

      "So, if I throw my computer out of the window, I'll get more FLOPS?"

      That's the jist of the meaning behind 'Vista Capable'. If you want it to go faster, throw it harder.

      --
      "History doesn't repeat itself, but it does rhyme." Mark Twain
    14. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by backwardMechanic · · Score: 4, Funny

      Fair point. So I should jump out of the window and my computer will run faster? I'm just looking fora few more cycles...

    15. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by Have+Blue · · Score: 5, Funny

      And then the fork bomb walks into the bar, and then the fork bomb walks into the bar, and then the fork bomb walks into the bar...

    16. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by flargleblarg · · Score: 2, Funny

      > Yeah, it's a fast CPU.

      You've never heard of the Power6? It's the chip that made the Kessel Run in less than 12 parsecs. She's fast enough for you, old man.

      > And it gets faster if you have smaller hands. Or if you watch your hands move by at close to the speed of light.

      She'll make point five past light speed.

    17. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

      I must confess, I have no practical appreciation for how long it takes light to travel from my head to my toe. Wouldn't it be better to compare the speed to another CPU rather than some esoteric property like light speed.

      Heck, it would be just as meaningful to have said, "It's so fast that the space-time continuum is warped by 30 nanometers when it starts up MS Office."

    18. Re:Worst analogy EVAR! by cababunga · · Score: 5, Funny

      So, if I throw my computer out of the window, I'll get more FLOPS? No, you won't. But you may get better performance if you throw all the windows out of your computer.
  2. Units of measurement by muellerr1 · · Score: 5, Funny

    I'm glad they stopped measuring chip speed in Hertz and are now using the simpler metric fingertip-to-knuckle units.

    --
    steampunk web design
    1. Re:Units of measurement by n3tcat · · Score: 5, Funny

      Well, it makes it much easier to explain why multicore processors work faster. Though I expect problems when explaining more than 5 cores per chip...

    2. Re:Units of measurement by plover · · Score: 5, Funny
      I thought this meant they were switching from bogomips to bogogips.

      But then I suppose some math genius is going to come along and claim we should be counting bogipigips because bogogips is just a marketing term.

      --
      John
    3. Re:Units of measurement by $RANDOMLUSER · · Score: 5, Funny

      I calculate a "fingertip-to-knuckle unit" to be 3.174 * 10^-4 football fields.

      --
      No folly is more costly than the folly of intolerant idealism. - Winston Churchill
    4. Re:Units of measurement by TheGratefulNet · · Score: 2, Funny

      you can measure in groups of 5 finger-knuckle units at a time. after that, you have to, well, bank-swap. sort of.

      its not all its cracked up to be.

      --

      --
      "It is now safe to switch off your computer."
    5. Re:Units of measurement by hallucinogen · · Score: 3, Funny

      How many fingertip-to-knuckle units does the library of congress hold?

    6. Re:Units of measurement by Enry · · Score: 2, Funny

      By then the speeds will be fast enough that you can use toes as a measuring stick.

    7. Re:Units of measurement by Gazzonyx · · Score: 5, Funny

      American or British football fields, man?! Be precise or we'll have another mibibyte(MiB) situation on our hands, for craps sake!

      --

      If I mod you up, it doesn't necessarily mean I agree with what you've said, sorry.

    8. Re:Units of measurement by BJH · · Score: 5, Funny

      No, no no. You've got your units all mixed up.

      The correct question to ask there would be:

      "How many Libraries of Congress can I process in a fortnight with one hand?"

    9. Re:Units of measurement by TeknoHog · · Score: 5, Funny

      But then I suppose some math genius is going to come along and claim we should be counting bogipigips because bogogips is just a marketing term.

      Yeah, when bogopigs fly.

      --
      Escher was the first MC and Giger invented the HR department.
    10. Re:Units of measurement by Curien · · Score: 5, Funny

      "How many Libraries of Congress can I process in a fortnight with one hand?"

      The LoC has pr0n?

      --
      It's always a long day... 86400 doesn't fit into a short.
    11. Re:Units of measurement by TeknoHog · · Score: 4, Funny

      American or British football fields, man?!

      Huh.. I don't know that! Aaarrggh! *falls into the chasm*

      --
      Escher was the first MC and Giger invented the HR department.
    12. Re:Units of measurement by spazdor · · Score: 3, Funny

      And then once again India will end up doing it cheaper and faster than us.

      --
      DRM: Terminator crops for your mind!
    13. Re:Units of measurement by darkpixel2k · · Score: 2, Funny

      By then the speeds will be fast enough that you can use toes as a measuring stick.

      ...and even later, my penis size.

      --
      There's no place like ::1 (I've completed my transition to IPv6)
  3. Tried running Vista SP1 on that monster... by jkrise · · Score: 4, Funny

    and all the water turned into steam!

    --
    If you keep throwing chairs, one day you'll break windows....
  4. National Lampoon Radio Hour by sm62704 · · Score: 4, Funny

    'It's hard to make the average person understand just how fast this is,' said IBM Chief Technology Officer Bernard Meyerson, offering an example meant to explain his company's baby that still leaves the listener awed with the speediness of the two laggards.

    Made me think of a National Lampoon Radio Hour (SNL before it was on TV) skit about the George Foreman-Muhammed Ali fight. Foreman (John Belushi IIRC) talking about Ali:

    "He so fast he can turn off the light and be in bed before the room get dark!"

    --
    mcgrew's razor: Never attribute to stupidity that which can be explained by greedy self-interest
  5. Re:Sour grapes or a real arguement by Timesprout · · Score: 3, Funny

    IBM just hired some peeps from the Intel marketing division.

    --
    Do not try to read the dupe, thats impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth
    What truth?
    There is no dupe
  6. And in 25 year's time... by Gordonjcp · · Score: 4, Funny

    ... it will be in a washing machine controller.

    1. Re:And in 25 year's time... by Timesprout · · Score: 2, Funny

      Running Vista with SP 236, the one with extra spin.

      --
      Do not try to read the dupe, thats impossible. Instead, only try to realize the truth
      What truth?
      There is no dupe
    2. Re:And in 25 year's time... by martin_henry · · Score: 2, Funny

      ...and Aero will allow your suds to look transparent!

      --
      www.purevolume.com/martyd
  7. Better analogy. by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny
    Better analogy; He should've said;

    'Hold your index finger out in front of your face,' Meyerson said in a telephone interview from IBM headquarters in New York. 'Ha Haw! Now you look like a retard!
  8. Re:It's a ploy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Don't be silly.

    Apple doesn't care about marketing, they are only interested in making quality product.

  9. Multicore speed explained. by HellProphet · · Score: 2, Funny

    For multi-core do you have to hold as many fingers up as there are cores to understand the speed over multiple cores?

  10. Re:It's a ploy by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    Too bad Apple no longer uses IBM processors, this would've been a great marketing scheme for Steve Jobs.


    Exactly.

    Imagine, you could compute at an insanely great speed while frying eggs on your Powerbook!

  11. Re:YES! by cbart387 · · Score: 2, Funny

    I'm sure glad that joke isn't wearing thin!

    --
    Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine.
  12. Obligatory fortnight by davidwr · · Score: 2, Funny

    How many Libraries of Congress can it index per fortnight?

    --
    Knowledge is how to play a game, intelligence is how to win, wisdom is knowing what game to play.
  13. Guy shoulda explained it like in the Italian Job by srussia · · Score: 2, Funny

    Lyle: I'm gonna get a NAD T-770 digital decoder with a seventy-watt amp and and Burr Brown D.A.C.'s.

    Hansome Rob: [at a loss] Yeah...

    Lyle: It's a big stereo. Speakers so loud, they blow women's clothes off.

    Handsome Rob: Now you're talking!

    --
    Set your phasers on "funky"!
  14. Wasn't it Dennis Hopper that said, by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    A pico-second is how long it takes a slashdotter to think of something stupid?

  15. Re:Meaningless Indicator of Processing Speed by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

    I'm working on a much faster multi-core cheap based on a new concept of extreme simplify all code using SISC instructions (aka Single Instruction Set Computer) and I'm reaching several tens of billion NOP's per core.

    When I power off the system it can sustain the proposed performance for a period of eternity seconds - best instructions per watt ratio ever found.

    PS: Still trying to design an operating system for this architecture that can produce end results different than Windows on x86.

  16. Re:Power6 architecture: it's different by aproposofwhat · · Score: 5, Funny

    Yes, although Gentoo will still take a week to compile ;P

    --
    One swallow does not a fellatrix make
  17. I'm holding a finger in front of my face... by slyborg · · Score: 4, Funny

    ...but it's not my index finger....

  18. This fast... by AttillaTheNun · · Score: 3, Funny
    'Hold your index finger out in front of your face,'

    and I thought he was going to finish that with "and it goes THIS fast!!!", as he waves his finger across his face as fast as he can.

    That's how my brother and I used to measure seconds when we were 5 years old. Accurate to within 500% (your mileage may vary).

  19. What about BogoMIPS? Huh? Huh? by Pharmboy · · Score: 2, Funny

    But how many BogoMIPS is that? After all, that is most computers do, most of the time.

    Think about it: This new chip can do nothing up to 2 to 3 times faster than any other chip on the market! We are talking about incredible productivity gains during idle times!

    (why yes, I do work in marketing...)

    --
    Tequila: It's not just for breakfast anymore!
  20. What he should have said ... by j-min · · Score: 1, Funny

    ... was if the processor were an acid, and you were to put on a pair of goggles, the goggles would do nothing.