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MS Clearflow To Help Drivers Avoid Traffic Jams

Pioneer Woman writes "Microsoft announced plans to introduce a Web-based service for driving directions that incorporates complex software models to help users avoid traffic jams. The system is intended to reflect the complex traffic interactions that occur as traffic backs up on freeways and spills over onto city streets and will be freely available as part of the company's Live.com site for 72 cities in the US. Microsoft researchers designed algorithms that modeled traffic behavior by collecting trip data from Microsoft employees who volunteered to carry GPS units in their cars. In the end they were able to build a model for predicting traffic based on four years of data, effectively creating individual 'personalities' for over 800,000 road segments in the Seattle region. In all the system tracks about 60 million road segments in the US."

28 of 243 comments (clear)

  1. Traffic James? by davidwr · · Score: 5, Funny

    Does KD use Microsoft Spell-cheque?

    --
    Knowledge is how to play a game, intelligence is how to win, wisdom is knowing what game to play.
    1. Re:Traffic James? by robably · · Score: 4, Funny

      No, it's just that the system is designed for chauffeur-driven cars.

    2. Re:Traffic James? by SailorSpork · · Score: 4, Funny

      I for one would like to welcome our traffic-monitoring overlord... James.

    3. Re:Traffic James? by catwh0re · · Score: 4, Funny

      it seems that microsoft think we need help with driving.. on the contrary I think it's microsoft that need help with drivers.

    4. Re:Traffic James? by Traffic+James · · Score: 5, Funny

      I love you too, man.

    5. Re:Traffic James? by Giometrix · · Score: 5, Funny

      Im Traffic James bitch!

      --
      Download free e-books, lectures, and tutorials at bookgoldmine.com
    6. Re:Traffic James? by Texas+Bill · · Score: 2, Funny

      Welcome to the party, James.

      --
      Pleased ter meet'cha!

      Texas Bill
  2. well ... by JaffaKREE · · Score: 5, Funny

    Traffic James *IS* a dick.

    1. Re:well ... by minginqunt · · Score: 4, Funny

      Traffic James *IS* a dick. And if that isn't a Slashdot memetag by bedtime, there's ain't no justice.

      Tags: trafficjamesisadick

      Woo!
    2. Re:well ... by Traffic+James · · Score: 5, Funny

      Traffic James *IS* a dick. Hey - that's completely unfair! You don't even know me!
    3. Re:well ... by Traffic+James · · Score: 3, Funny

      No you're not. *I'm* Traffic James, bitch!

  3. Re: ... Traffic James by InfraredAD · · Score: 2, Funny

    I really hate Traffic James... they're everywhere. I mean, how can one man be in so many places at once? Santa's being given a run for his money... And yes, if the title gets edited, it really was "MS Clearflow To Help Drivers Avoid Traffic James"

  4. Re:but seriously by TheMeuge · · Score: 5, Funny

    I guess they decided to take phrases "computer crash" and "blue screen of death" seriously.

    I could only imagine the program modifying GPS directions on the fly:

    - Left turn ahead.
    - Traffic ahead.
    - Please turn right and over the railing
    - Please fall 200 feet to the road below and proceed west on highway 53.

  5. And when the system fails... by rarel · · Score: 3, Funny

    ... it gives a whole new meaning to the word "crash"!

  6. Is Traffic James Related To Ask Jeeves? by Skeetskeetskeet · · Score: 5, Funny

    Both probably couldn't give me directions to the nearest hooker.

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    Yeah, my karma sucks....but so do the mods.
  7. I resent that by JamesRose · · Score: 4, Funny

    Sometimes it just feels like people are conspiring to avoid me, finally I've got some proof!

  8. so does that make accidents by OrochimaruVoldemort · · Score: 2, Funny

    the blue map of death?

    --
    If people can get past, can they get future? Best way to confuse a stoner
  9. Re:James? by JaffaKREE · · Score: 2, Funny

    He's a dick.

  10. Who the hell is Traffic James? by multipartmixed · · Score: 3, Funny

    Some cop with a pink mohawk?

    --

    Do daemons dream of electric sleep()?
  11. Re:What next? Air traffic control? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

    I'd rather not trust suggestions by Microsoft software ("Hi, I see you're trying to drive to work!..."), particularly those which are based upon the decisions made by Microsoft employees. We've had too much experience with the results of their decisions.

  12. Re:but seriously by ozmanjusri · · Score: 5, Funny

    You are about to fall 200 feet to a road below.[Cancel] [Allow]

    --
    "I've got more toys than Teruhisa Kitahara."
  13. The Unfortunate Fate of Traffic James by soulsteal · · Score: 5, Funny

    Aye, 'tis been a while since I heard the name of the Hound of the Highway, Traffic James.

    Jim Axelman was once an ordinary man. He had a wife, three kids, even a Labrador retriever named Buddy. But his life was changed forever as he drove to work on fateful day. You see, he was trying to change lanes while talking on his cell phone and jamming out to some Led Zeppelin playing on the classic cock station when he unfortunately cut off a Gypsy minivan-mom. The Gypsy, being a member of the same PTA as Jim, knew who he was and cursed his name to the Heavens. Since that day, he's been forced to drive the streets.

    His blinkers never work. If you're in a hurry, he slows you down. If you're not rushed, he tailgates. He can't stop for food or bathroom breaks, his odometer never changes. He forever wanders the Earth in his dark blue Geo Metro.

    It's been said that some nights, on an empty country road.... you can still hear the a never-ending play of Kashmir on the wind.

  14. Re:I might believe this by OrochimaruVoldemort · · Score: 2, Funny

    it would be easier to put toll roads in vista.

    --
    If people can get past, can they get future? Best way to confuse a stoner
  15. Mod parent +1 punny by davidwr · · Score: 2, Funny

    We really need custom mods.

    --
    Knowledge is how to play a game, intelligence is how to win, wisdom is knowing what game to play.
  16. Re:Clear type by holyspidoo · · Score: 1, Funny

    Clearflow is based on Vista. It takes so much time to boot, by the time its ready, everyone is at work already and the streets are free. Genius.

  17. Re:Stop Traffic Jams by Stanistani · · Score: 2, Funny

    Yet another sad example of why Slashdot needs an ISO standard for sarcasm and humor tags.

    Let's get Microsoft on the job immediately.

    We need a six thousand page brief and some corrupt committee members, stat!

  18. Re:James? by Traffic+James · · Score: 2, Funny

    Right here, dude! I took a shower this morning though, so maybe you guys can give me a second chance, huh?

  19. You put the apostrophe too low by tepples · · Score: 2, Funny

    *I'm* Traffic James, bitch! You put the apostrophe too low. The proper way is as follows: "I'm Traffic James' bitch!"