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Interview With Author of the First Spoof Language
An anonymous reader brings us Computerworld's interview with Don Woods, one of the creators of Compiler Language With No Pronounceable Acronym (INTERCAL). INTERCAL and its documentation were created in 1972 as a parody of that era's languages and instruction manuals. Among other things, Woods had this to say:
"We designed the language without too much trouble. Writing the manual took a while, especially for things like the circuit diagrams we included as nonsensical illustrations. The compiler itself actually wasn't too much trouble, given that we weren't at all concerned with optimising the performance of either the compiler or the compiled code. I admit I'm surprised at its longevity. Some of the jokes in the original work feel rather dated at this point. It helps that the language provides a place where people can discuss oddball features missing from other languages, such as the 'COME FROM' statement and operators that work in base 3."
Intercal has nothing on Brainfuck. Brainfuck makes every other spoof programming language look like a joke. I'd write the Hello World! program here, but Slashdot's content filter doesn't support Brainfuck code.
Microsoft announces new language for the .NET platform, IronINTERCAL.
With all the features of regular INTERCAL, but only runs on Windows Vista (tm).
Miguel De Icaza had this to say about the exciting new development - "No Me Gusta." He's clearly speechless about this fabulous new language available only on Windows Vista (tm).
LOLCODE might actually get this brain-damaged BASIC refugee trying their hand at programming again after all these years.
Back in the 1970s somebody told me about an operating system. I can only remember a couple of statements:
KILL SUPERVISOR
JUMP SECRETARY
INTERCAL has nothing on APL. Or even on Stroustroup's parody of C, which people actually think you're supposed to use.
Oh please.
Has noone here ever used perl? :)
Google should just agree to turn over their source code in the Viacom suit after running it through a {sane language} ==> INTERCAL translator.
"It's the height of ridiculousness to say for those 9 lines you get hundreds of millions."
Then there's the Apple version: iNTERCAL.
"It's the height of ridiculousness to say for those 9 lines you get hundreds of millions."
Wow! Researching these esoteric programming languages has been more than a brainfuck - it is positively a brainfuck++. Nay, I'm sure just reading of them is causing an irreversible loss of knowledge of real programming languages - that must surely qualify as a quantum brainfuck whereby both cannot be fully comprehended at the same time.
Man, now I really feel like a dumbf*ck! Fuck, Fuck! Double fuck!
The bad news is that my pointy haired boss has ordered that all development switch to his new favorite language. I think he may have been smoking something.
This is bad for me because he has now had to ask me to go ahead and come in on Saturday. This means I will have to cancel my date, who has real come hither eyes, and I was so confident it was going to be a real beneficial[0] night[1].
Argh!
I wish I could get all my ducks in a row so I could give him a swift kick with my size nines so he walks funny for a week, flick him the V and leave this crummy company; that would rock!
[0] High five!
[1] Unlike the last one, on which the lady gave me an unexpected present.
"Three eyes are better than one" -- Lieutenant Columbo
Um, which program are you talking about? If you're referring to the X11 program Ghostview, then you should be using gv, in which you can access other pages by the not-at-all-obscure non-command-line approach of clicking on the "next page" button. If you're referring to the Windows program GSview, on the other hand, then it's slightly harder: you access other pages by clicking on the "next page" button.
Um, in other words, what the fuck are you smoking?
Yes, but the real breakthrough in computing, which I'm sure will be coming any day now, is the computed COME FROM statement, wherein the COME FROM statement gives a *formula* (which can include arithmetic, variables, function calls, ...) for calculating the line number to COME FROM. When combined with the ability to COME FROM a single line to multiple other lines, as found in Threaded INTERCAL, this becomes very powerful. Especially when you can toggle it with ABSTAIN and REINSTATE, either globally (PLEASE DO ABSTAIN FROM COMING FROM) or on a per-line basis.
Cut that out, or I will ship you to Norilsk in a box.