Slashdot Mirror

← Back to Stories (view on slashdot.org)

Microsoft Going After Yahoo! Again

Posted by CmdrTaco on from the get-back-up-again dept.

Corrupt writes "Microsoft on Monday released a letter that supports investor activist Carl Icahn's efforts to unseat Yahoo's board, as well as confirming its interest to explore a bid to buy the entire company, or just its search assets, with a new board."

15 of 218 comments (clear)

  1. If at first you don't succeed.... by jeiler · · Score: 4, Funny

    ...adapt to their defenses and continue assimilation.

    --

    If you haven't been down-modded lately, you aren't trying.

    Sacred cows make the best hamburger.

    1. Re:If at first you don't succeed.... by Shakrai · · Score: 5, Funny

      ...adapt to their defenses and continue assimilation.

      Having big boobs and a catsuit helps too ;)

      --
      I want peace on earth and goodwill toward man.
      We are the United States Government! We don't do that sort of thing.
    2. Re:If at first you don't succeed.... by jeiler · · Score: 4, Funny

      Somehow, I don't think Jeri Ryan works for Microsoft. Come to think of it, I don't think the word "soft" applies anywhere near Ryan. :D

      --

      If you haven't been down-modded lately, you aren't trying.

      Sacred cows make the best hamburger.

    3. Re:If at first you don't succeed.... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 3, Funny

      Somehow, I don't think Jeri Ryan works for Microsoft

      So you've identified the problem.... now what's the solution?

    4. Re:If at first you don't succeed.... by rvw · · Score: 4, Funny

      Come to think of it, I don't think the word "soft" applies anywhere near Ryan. :D

      You obviously missed the two most important points here!

    5. Re:If at first you don't succeed.... by rvw · · Score: 3, Funny

      Come to think of it, I don't think the word "soft" applies anywhere near Ryan. :D

      You obviously missed the two most important points here!

      Come to think of it, the word "micro" doesn't apply anywhere near Ryan!

    6. Re:If at first you don't succeed.... by oodaloop · · Score: 3, Funny

      Am I allowed to imagine a beowulf cluster of Jeri Ryans?

      --
      Tic-Tac-Toe, Global Thermonuclear War, and relationships all have the same winning move.
  2. Yahoo needs a restraining order by ClaraBow · · Score: 4, Funny

    As a yahoo user, I feel strangely threatened. I can't explain it, but it"s like a bad ex-girlfriend who just can't accept no for an answer.

    1. Re:Yahoo needs a restraining order by snoyberg · · Score: 2, Funny

      Isn't "break up a girlfriend" sort of what Reiser did?

      --
      Thank God for evolution.
  3. Re:Um by jeiler · · Score: 2, Funny

    Core assets = $30 billion USD. I guess that money's burning a hole in Ballmer's pocket.

    --

    If you haven't been down-modded lately, you aren't trying.

    Sacred cows make the best hamburger.

  4. Re:Ah, so this is it... by Foofoobar · · Score: 3, Funny

    Yep... fresh out of ideas and more desperate than before.

    --
    This is my sig. There are many like it but this one is mine.
  5. Does not compute by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Not only is this not a car analogy, but...ex-girlfriend?

  6. PowerSet by oahazmatt · · Score: 5, Funny

    Didn't Microsoft already decide to abandon the quest for Yahoo! and purchase the search technology from PowerSet?

    To be a fly on the wall in these meetings:
    Ballmer: Let's buy Yahoo.
    Board Member: They won't sell.
    Ballmer: Did you ask them, or tell them?
    Board Member: A little of both.
    Ballmer: Did you say we'll be their best friend?
    Board Member: Yeah, but Yang just watched Pirates of Silicon Valley and isn't fooled.
    Ballmer: Is that the movie with Johnny Depp, or the good one with Jenna Jameson?
    Board Member:...
    Ballmer: What's this "PowerSet" thing?
    Board Member: That's a start-up Websearch company. They're doing a lot of what we want to do with Live search.
    Ballmer: Great! Buy it!
    Board Member: Okay, so I guess that takes care of the Yahoo--
    Ballmer: Buy them, too!
    Board Member: What? Why? Powerset will--
    Ballmer: They're working with Google! It's anti-competitive! We have to buy them! And it will make Live search even stronger after we incorperate SourPet--
    Board Member: PowerSet--
    Ballmer: Whatever! Just buy Yahoo so we can say we're not anti-competitive.
    Board Member: You want to purchase two separate Internet search systems, incorperate them into our failed system, to avoid anti-competitive practices?
    Ballmer: Finally! It's like talking to a brick wall sometimes, y'know?

    --
    Those who believe the Internet is private,
    find their privates are on the Internet.
  7. give me the ball puppy by MrKaos · · Score: 3, Funny

    give me the ball puppy, drop the ball, give me the ball puppy, drop the ball puppy, puppy drop the ball, puppy give me the ball, drop the ball puppy puppy drop the ball, puppy, PUPPY GIVE ME THE BALL, drop the ball puppy, give me the ball, drop it,, drop it, drop the ball

    --
    My ism, it's full of beliefs.
  8. Gah! by Spy+der+Mann · · Score: 2, Funny

    Having big boobs and a catsuit helps too ;)

    The mental image of Ballmer wearing that suit just gives me the creeps.