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Why Microsoft Is Chasing Yahoo

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the jeeves-wanted-to-much-money dept.

latif writes "Microsoft has been chasing Yahoo for quite a while now. Most people think that it all started with Microsoft's acquisition bid for Yahoo, but this is not so. It is well-known that Microsoft and Yahoo have been negotiating since at least May of 2006, and may have been negotiating since 2003. I have done a thorough analysis utilizing information made public over the past five years and my analysis suggests that most people are completely wrong about what Microsoft wants from Yahoo."

16 of 245 comments (clear)

  1. The reason is obvious! by JCSoRocks · · Score: 5, Funny

    Microsoft just wants to make their name really exciting. When they buy / merge with Yahoo! they can combine the names and all of a sudden "Microsoft" becomes, "Microsoft!" - the most exciting company ever! When that happens be on the look out for "Windows 7!"

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    You are using English. Please learn the difference between loose and lose; they're, there, and their; your and you're.
    1. Re:The reason is obvious! by syrinx · · Score: 5, Funny

      I was guessing Microhoo! Then when they merge with Google/Youtube, they can be Microhoogletube!

      Add in Oracle and they can be Microhoogletubacle!

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      Quidquid latine dictum sit, altum sonatur.
    2. Re:The reason is obvious! by Temujin_12 · · Score: 5, Funny

      When that happens be on the look out for "Windows 7!"

      Windows 7! = Windows 5040?

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      Faith is a willingness to accept something w/o complete proof and to act on it. Reason allows you to correct that faith.
    3. Re:The reason is obvious! by Jesus_666 · · Score: 2, Funny

      Windows 7! = Windows 5040?

      Given how long Vista has taken them I think that's quite likely.

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      USE HOT GRITS WITH STATUE OF NATALIE PORTMAN (NAKED AND PETRIFIED)
    4. Re:The reason is obvious! by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 2, Funny

      So long as Oracle doesn't buy out Debian. That would be a debacle.

  2. Perfect Strangers ? by ad0n · · Score: 5, Funny

    From the linked article: The Microsoft bid never made sense from a business perspective either. Yahoo has always had stale search offerings, second rate search technology, and a mediocre unmotivated workforce. Yahoo derives its value primarily from the massive web-traffic the company controls, but the cost of controlling this web-traffic is likely to be prohibitive for Microsoft

    Second rate, stale, mediocre, unmotivated: sounds like a perfect fit for the Microsoft empire.

    1. Re:Perfect Strangers ? by nxtr · · Score: 2, Funny

      Thanks for saving me time today by using acronyms in your comment!

    2. Re:Perfect Strangers ? by madgeorge · · Score: 2, Funny

      omg.yahoo.com anyone?

      How have I been ignorant of this for so long? And why(!) (bleeding eyes) have I been cursed to be exposed to it now? Why has my Dog forsaken me?

  3. Re:"Utilizing"? by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 1, Funny

    Or, as they presumably spell it in the US, "uze".

  4. Re:"Utilizing"? by 140Mandak262Jamuna · · Score: 5, Funny

    I concur with the most recent ancestor poster. I object to repeatedly tautologically redundant grandiloquence. I eschew such verbiage diligently. This very response shows you all that I am the very epitome of plain talking simple folk, scratch scratch, the very epitome of rustic linguistics.

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    sed -e 's/Chuck Norris/Rajnikant/g' joke > fact
  5. brain and brain... what is brain? by Gary+W.+Longsine · · Score: 3, Funny

    Apple is a software company. The MacBook or iPhone you get with your copy of OSX is just part of the packaging.

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  6. declining marginal relevance of Yahoo bombing by Gary+W.+Longsine · · Score: 2, Funny

    If the Pope claps one hand on a tree, which falls over in the woods and lands on some bear scat, does anyone then refer to Google Bombs as Yahoo Bombs?

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  7. Too Bad! by gbutler69 · · Score: 4, Funny

    They could become "MicroHooHoo"!

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    Over-the-top Response Guy! Giving "Over-the-Top Responses" since 1970.
  8. Re:"Utilizing"? by clang_jangle · · Score: 2, Funny

    Yooz furrnerz jes caint git it, kinya?
    :)

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    Caveat Utilitor
  9. I once had a housemate who chased Yahoo! by raddan · · Score: 3, Funny

    He painted his room pink.

  10. Re:Holy run-on article by ginbot462 · · Score: 2, Funny

    That article was so long, I actually had to start working!

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    Atlas Shrugged : Thematic Story :: Battlefield Earth : Organized Religion