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Spam King Escapes From Federal Prison
Bobfrankly1 writes "The FBI, IRS, and the Rocky Mountain Safe Streets Task Force are helping the US Marshals search for escaped 'Spam King' Edward 'Eddie' Davidson. He apparently jumped in a car with his wife, changed clothes at home, and hasn't been seen since." Update: 07/24 22:20 GMT by T : It seems that Davidson has been found, victim of a murder-suicide which also left two others dead.
If only there was some way to send an email to everybody in the world with this information.
;-)
The one-armed man did it!
Mit der Dummheit kämpfen Götter selbst vergebens
I knew they were hurting for ideas but this is rediculous!
He's probably headed for the nearest datacenter to unleash an apocalyptic deluge of spam. Head for the hills! It's the end I tell you!
I thought that changing clothes only worked if your wanted level was 2 stars.
On the upside, I'm pretty sure it's legal to shoot escaped convicts.
Dewey, what part of this looks like authorities should be involved?
He got tired of Bart Simpson making him write "I will not send out spam email again." on the chalkboard again and again.
Help a man when he is in trouble and he will remember you when he is in trouble again.
Looks like the police spam blocker wasn't configured properly :(
He's going to totally ruin the honor system for everyone else.
I for one welcome our new king of penis enlargement overlord.
In real jail, your inbox is crammed full of unsolicited male.
Nah, Arrested Development taught me that you can escape as many times as you want, and they'll eventually let you go home with an ankle bracelet.
Not a typewriter
I mean with all that money the Nigerian Prince has, I'm sure he can spare a room for Spam King.
If there is any real justice in this world, an angry mob of sysadmins, email admins, etc. will hunt him down and force feed him a buttload of cialis until he vomits and chokes to death on them.
In his next prison sentence, his inbox will be stuffed and it will probably be unsolicited.
Because prison is a place for murderers and rapists. Not mass mailers...... He may have broke the law but putting him in real prison could make things worse for everyone when he gets out.
Yeah, real prison is where people learn how to make weapons grade email.
Dear Batman,
You protected Gotham from the personification of fear, the Scarecrow.
You protected Gotham from the personification of chaos, the Joker.
Now a new threat has arisen.
Your people need you now, more than ever for the personification of annoyance, irritation and aggravation has escaped his just imprisonment, the Spam King!
While I know how adverse you are to taking a life even in the most dire circumstances, in this instance I believe I speak for everyone and say that this man is a threat to sanity itself. So, should he threaten innocents with p3n1s en1argm3n7 or heirs to Zimbabwean fortunes, we'll understand if you have no choice but to drop him off of a building or something. Pummeling him to death would be acceptable too.
Dearest,
I greet you in the name of God.I also want to sincerely apologies for and discomfort or embarrassment may cause you.As I am quite sure that you will be surprise to receive this message from me, i got your email address contact after a critical search for someone reliable with a good heart with whom i will be able to transact business with. I am spiritually assured that you will be capable of assisting me,this is why i have taken this step to contact you and hopefully get your attention to assist me in a certain business transaction that will be of benefit to you and I.
My name is Edward Davidson and I have substantial funds and assets to a value of US$ 1 billion within the United States of America that I need to have transferred out of the country in the form of cash or other high-value items. Please send an email to eddie@spamk1ng.org if you are interested in helping me. You will get a share of 30 percent if you are successful in helping me with this!
Please keep this confidential!
If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker would destroy civilization.
One possible benefit is that on coming out of jail he might be a little less keen to help people enlarge their penises.
Real Daleks don't climb stairs - they level the building.
Thanks internet tough guy!
Or do you talk to people like that in real life too?
If we're assuming archetypal prison behavior, wouldn't it be his outbox that gets stuffed?
Be on the lookout for a man with a large penis and breasts, lots of mortgages, sexy naked teens, and a bottle of v1@grA. He was last seen with the ex-Minister of Finance for Nigeria, Dr Mugotumbe.
It is by the juice of the coffee bean that thoughts acquire speed, the teeth acquire stains. The stains become a warning
Apparently it's just Women & people who appreciate them he doesn't like.
Wanna fight ? Bend over, stick your head up your ass, and fight for air.
Soon to be crammed full of unsolicited MALE. Once they catch him and send him off to REAL prison!
What a maroon! He get's sent to the country club you aren't allowed to leave for a less than 2 year vacation and he ESCAPES? He's gonna get EXACTLY what he deserves now.
Official Heretic from the "Church of Global Warming". Proven right thanks to whistle blowers. AGW = Flat Earth Theory
Dear Spam Recipient, I am the Spam King, and I have hidden 200 million dollars ($200,000,000) in a secret location in the USA. Since I have escaped from the prison and left the country to work for the Russian Mafia , I am not in a position to recover the money from that location. If you will help me recover my money, I will give you 25% of it. Please contact me at ivan@the_terrible.mafia.ru
sed -e 's/Chuck Norris/Rajnikant/g' joke > fact
He'll probably also have plenty of male in his outbox.
1. Have Wife (sic) drive up to your cell
2. Jump in wife's car
3. ????
4. Get Away! (Profit?)
I heard that he is about to recieve eleventy jillion dollars from a Nigerian prince.
Of course there are. He should email everybody to apologise!
Bogtha Bogtha Bogtha
Expect him to talk tough to you too since Internet should be capitalized. (douchebag)
Support a few technologists in Washington.
Here on Slashdot, a Wife is at the very least a mythical creature like a Gorgon or a Chimera, if not an actual Deity. Capitalization is required.
- None can love freedom heartily, but good men; the rest love not freedom, but license. -- John Milton
Not to mention additional time for the felony of escaping in the first place. He'll most likely end up in a maximum security prison with a roomie who was a violent offender. I hope the first thing he hears is 'Boy, you sure do got purty eyes.'
From the press release:
On April 28, 2008, Davidson was sentenced by U.S. District Court Judge Marcia S. Krieger to serve 21 months (just under 2 years) in federal prison.
I'm sure glad they did that math for me. o_O
I think you're thinking of Digg ...
It's not rape if you shout "Surprise!" first.
If only there was some way to Digg your comment, this wonderful circle of justice would be complete.
--- He advocated thrift and hard work and disapproved of loose women who turned him down. ---
For some reason, your post made me think of Hans Reiser.
Only three things are certain; death, taxes, and apocryphal quotations - Ben Franklin.
Maybe it's for the benfit of the Yurpeans. I here they have metric time over there.
Only three things are certain; death, taxes, and apocryphal quotations - Ben Franklin.
not if he's leaving the country, but what country would be willing to harbor him? I hear nigeria is nice this time of year.
Nah, Arrested Development taught me that you can escape as many times as you want, and they'll eventually let you go home with an ankle bracelet.
Only if you have a lawyer like Barry. He's very good.
Warning: Opinions known to be heavily biased.
For example, a 17-year-old boy was gang-raped in prison [nytimes.com] after he robbed a guy with a toy gun.
I don't know how many times that is, but it sounds like a lot.
Cue the 400 posts arguing whether or not "Internet" should be capitalized.
The press release was for Americans.
Maybe it's for the benfit of the Yurpeans. I here they have metric time over there.
Yup - We just recently converted. 10-hour days, 10-day weeks, 10-week months, and 10-month years. Sure is funny weather we're having this Winter...
He's getting rather old, but he's a good mouse.
I live with my dad, fag. He's been known to masquerade as a women though.
Here we go again.
Your ad here.
But if you're equating wives to deities in the sense that they're mystical infallible ideal beings
Is it odd that I read "inflatable" rather than infallible?
In Soviet Russia prison, male spams you!
oO0Oo
"In real jail, your inbox is crammed with unsolicited male".
http://talkback.zdnet.com/5208-12691-0.html?forumID=1&threadID=50057&messageID=938515&start=0
>>Sure is funny weather we're having this Winter...
I think you meant Wintre.
-b
No offense, but I've stopped responding to AC's.
Here on Slashdot, a Wife is at the very least a mythical creature like a Gorgon or a Chimera
Hey, even mythical creatures can have problems relating to the fairer sex.
I was particularly astonished by the photo of this guy that they included in the story. Good heavens, he's guilty of sending out too many unwanted e-mails...yes, yes, I know, penny stock scams, yada-yada...
But based on that mug shot, I would think was guilty of making Spam (the meat) out of his victims.
Is this what I have to look forward to in my IT career? To end up looking like Jeffrey Dahmer?
Joe Dougherty, Florida, USA
The words I thought I brought, I left behind. So, never mind.
And I thought the only reason they were trying to sneak into this country was to get a Visa card..... hmmph, guess it must be something else ;)
Can't really blame the Mexicans though. They want to escape their downtrodden country and go somewhere with economic security and prospects for the future..... and the only way to get to Canada from Mexico is to go through the United States ;)
I want peace on earth and goodwill toward man.
We are the United States Government! We don't do that sort of thing.
Cue the 400 posts arguing whether or not "Internet" should be capitalized.
1 Internet = 8 internets
Looks like it works as advertised, after all