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Ballmer Ordered To Testify In 'Vista Capable' Case

Posted by ryuzaki0 on from the take-the-stand-monkey-man dept.

alphadogg writes "A federal judge in Seattle has ordered Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer to testify in a class action lawsuit against Microsoft that alleges the company misled consumers in a marketing campaign for its Windows Vista operating system in which computers sold with an older Microsoft OS were labeled 'Vista Capable' when in fact they could only run a basic version of Vista. Ballmer has unique personal knowledge of facts surrounding the case, therefore he must face questioning, Judge Marsha Pechman of the US District Court for the Western District of Washington at Seattle ruled, according to court documents released late Friday."

8 of 235 comments (clear)

  1. Ballmer in court by rallymatte · · Score: 5, Funny

    I wonder if they allow chair-throwing in court these days.
    If they do, I think Microsoft stands a pretty good chance.

    1. Re:Ballmer in court by Andr+T. · · Score: 5, Funny

      What about monkey-dancing? The judge will be amazed!

      --

      Any life is made up of a single moment, the moment in which a man finds out, once and for all, who he is.

    2. Re:Ballmer in court by FinchWorld · · Score: 5, Funny

      Judge: Uh, I hate to interrupt your fun, boys, but I got a few complaints this case is crooked.
      Ballmer: [laughs] And how.
      Judge: Gee, I'd hate to close you down. Maybe we can reach a little, uh, understanding here. [Holds out the palm of his hand and motions his fingers so as to suggest that this is a bribe]
      Ballmer: I understand.
      Bill: Um, hey, Ballmer, I-- I think he wants--
      Ballmer: Not right now, Bill. Monkey Boy is talking to a Judge.
      Judge: Uh, let me put it this way. I'm looking for my friend Bill. [nods as he says Bill] Have you seen any Bills around here? [nods]
      Ballmer: Yes. [points at Bill] He's Bill.
      Judge: [groans] I-- Listen carefully, and watch me wink as I speak, okay?
      Ballmer: Okay.
      Judge: The guy I'm really looking for--wink--is Mr. Bribe--wink, wink. [holds out hand again]
      Ballmer: It's a lightweight operating system.
      Jusge: All right, that's it, I'm shutting this shit down.

      --
      "I may be full of crap about this game, and I may be wrong, and that's fine." -Jack Thompson
    3. Re:Ballmer in court by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      all rise .... and duck!

    4. Re:Ballmer in court by AioKits · · Score: 5, Funny

      It's a good thing Jusge broke in at the end to put an end to all this corruption!

      --
      "Quote me as saying I was mis-quoted." -Groucho Marx
    5. Re:Ballmer in court by Dystopian+Rebel · · Score: 5, Funny

      Prosecution: Following all the evidence that we have seen, in which many different customers and partners of Microsoft mention discussing the problems with you, do you maintain that you had no knowledge of these problems?

      Ballmer: Erg... ugh... errg!

      Judge: MISTER Ballmer! You have been warned before. I will find you in contempt of this court if you continue your attempts to dislodge the seat in the witness stand.

      Ballmer: [Sits down, sweaty. Sighs.]

      Judge: Answer the question, Mr Ballmer.
      MISTER BALLMER! Why are you painting your face blue?!

      Ballmer: I'm a PC and... I have just crashed.

      --
      Rich And Stupid is not so bad as Working For Rich And Stupid.
  2. Capable doesn't means complete by MosesJones · · Score: 5, Funny

    Part of the issue here is the meaning of the word capable. Balmer has already said that Vista isn't really a capable operating system (or at least wasn't when launched) so surely the argument therefore is that a machine that is incapable of running Vista is therefore getting exactly the same experience (or better) than someone who is actually running Vista.

    Thus actually Vista Capable is a comparison between XP and Vista and thus you are better off having XP as that is just as capable as Vista.

    Come on are we seriously thinking that Balmer can't talk his way around the word Capable?

    --
    An Eye for an Eye will make the whole world blind - Gandhi
    1. Re:Capable doesn't means complete by twl1973 · · Score: 5, Funny

      Just use the Bill Clinton defense: It depends on your definition of the word "is".