Facebook Wins $873 Million Lawsuit Against Spammer

damn_registrars writes "A US District judge has awarded $873 million dollars to Facebook in a default judgment against a spammer who sent messages to Facebook users about drugs and sex. This is the highest award so far in a civil suit under the CAN-SPAM Act."

Comments

This is one of those "statement awards"

[deft]

but from what I've seen, they get overturned, brought down to a reasonable level, or end upo being way more than the person can afford... which actually doesnt send a very good statement at all.

On the other hand... screw it, take his kidney.

Re:This is one of those "statement awards"

[plover]

On the other hand... screw it, take his kidney.

If they use an anesthetic, it's not really cruel, is it?

Re:This is one of those "statement awards"

[fm6]

If he's into sex and drugs, his kidney is probably not very valuable. If only he had stuck with rock-and-roll...

Re:Wow

[ettlz]

Roll over and take it, eh facebook users?

Yep, and take photos of it.

And then post those photos.

And tag the participants.

And set up a group for Rollers-over-and-Takers-of-It.

Re:It's too much to discourage anyone.

[Itninja]

I hate spammers. I think the punishment should be really cruel...hang on my lawyers telling me something....really? Fine. Well then it should at least be something really unusual. That will stop these spam...wait...what? DAMMIT!

"said Facebook"

[CannonballHead]

I am not sure why, but I find it comical that "Facebook" said something... although it would have been funnier had it said "blah blah blah," posted Facebook on the Associated Press's wall.

Re:It's too much to discourage anyone.

[telchine]

So you suggest..what? String 'em up?

You damn liberals always want to be nice to the bad guys!!

I suggest we slice out their innards and then string 'em up!

Enfoecement

[MountainLogic]

Now if Facebook will just forward their bank account information to Nigeria I'm sure the spammer will send them the money plus a large fee

Coincidence?

[Citizen of Earth]

awarded $873 million dollars to Facebook

In a strange coincidence, the odds of Facebook collecting any money from the spammer are also 873-million to one.

Re:It's too much to discourage anyone.

[Kent Recal]

You, Sir, are now my official in rem collateral discharged child support super-hero!
Oh and IANAL but I don't belive that YANAL.

Re:It's too much to discourage anyone.

[Kawahee]

Holy shit, my brain.

Re:It's too much to discourage anyone.

[lysergic.acid]

i found a loophole! the constitution only prohibits "cruel and unusual punishment." therefore, if you call it a prize/reward instead of a punishment, then you can make it as cruel and unusual as you want! right?

congratulations Mr. Guerbuez,
you have been selected as the winner of the Philip Lemarchand Puzzle Box Sweepstakes. as the grand prize recipient, you are being granted the once in a lifetime opportunity to experience the full gamut of hedonistic pleasures that the Lament Configuration has to offer. so get ready, because we are sending you on an all-expenses-paid vacation for one through the dimensional Schism to visit all of your favorite Cenobites.

here's what you can expect from this all-inclusive vacation of unspeakable horrors(TM):

• upon stepping through the Schism, our patented skin hooks will be the first to welcome you to this dimension of endless pain & suffering.*
• have a free laryngectomy on the house. this way no one will hear your screams of ecstasy as you enjoy our world-class sadomasochistic spa treatment. (it also greatly reduces the number of noise complaints we receive.)
• our steam saunas are the hottest in the world, kept constant at a balmy 800 F.
• amputations, castration, full lobotomy, etc.--all performed while you are fully awake. our bio-regenerative technology ensures that you will never run out of limbs or organs to have remove, so you can enjoy being mutilated again and again as our dedicated hierophants slow blur the line between pain and pleasure.
• forget exfoliating with chemical peels or microdermabrasion, our Surgeons from Beyond specialize in decortication using _macro_dermabrasion techniques--they will literally skin you alive. prepare to get flayed!
• an eternity of torture delivered by the Theologians of the Order of the Gash (Pinhead, Sister Nikoletta, Butterball, Chatterer, and Moby).

* - comes with a free face-lift.

disclaimer: all prizes are final and mandatory. extradimensional vacations not redeemable for cash and no substitutes are allowed. limited time offer expires 01/01/2012.