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Illinois Declares Pluto a Planet

Posted by timothy on from the after-ruling-out-pebble-and-mailing-tube dept.

The Bad Astronomer writes "The legislators in Illinois, always on the lookout for more places to find voters, have passed a resolution declaring Pluto is a planet. I'm not sure what else can be said here, except that — besides overstepping their jurisdiction just a wee bit — they make a couple of scientific howlers in the resolution itself."

22 of 512 comments (clear)

  1. Pff this is ridiculous by Rosco+P.+Coltrane · · Score: 5, Funny

    Everybody knows Pluto is a dog.

    --
    "A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of" - Ogden Nash
    1. Re:Pff this is ridiculous by Hognoxious · · Score: 4, Funny

      On the internet, nobody can tell if Pluto is a dog.

      --
      Confucius say, "Find worm in apple - bad. Find half a worm - worse."
    2. Re:Pff this is ridiculous by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

      Consider the work they do and how much they manage to get paid for it. My definition of idiot doesn't quite capture that. "Idiot savant" comes closer.

    3. Re:Pff this is ridiculous by Eunuchswear · · Score: 5, Funny

      Is Pluto covered with graveyards that we don't know about or something?

      Way to expose your ignorance.

      Pluto is the fucking king of the underworld!

      If you want to vote the dead, he's the guy to see.

      --
      Watch this Heartland Institute video
    4. Re:Pff this is ridiculous by xorsyst · · Score: 5, Funny

      Don't joke, the Dog Star is a very sirius matter.

      --
      Get free bitcoins: http://freebitco.in
    5. Re:Pff this is ridiculous by AGMW · · Score: 4, Funny
      And in Illinois, he is on the right side of the door?

      I suspect that in Illinois, no one can hear you scream!

      Hey - that'd be awesome on a T-shirt!

      --
      Eclectic beats from Leeds, UK
      handmadehands.co.uk
    6. Re:Pff this is ridiculous by pleappleappleap · · Score: 4, Funny

      In further news, the State of Illinois passes a law regulating the value of pi to exactly 3.000.

  2. This just in by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    Slashdot declares Illinois retarded

  3. I declare Illinois by roman_mir · · Score: 4, Funny

    and I declare Illinois a corn field.

    --
    You can't handle the truth.
  4. Re:Yo mama is so fat... by thomasdz · · Score: 5, Funny

    Yo mama is so fat...Illinois declared her a planet
    Yo mama is so ugly, astronomers who look at her think they're looking at Jupiter's moon IO
    Yo mama is so old, her boyfriends CARBON-date her
    Yo mama is so old and fat, her stomach is actually fusing helium with neon to produce magnesium just before she turns into a neutron star!
    Yo mama is so ugly, that when computer scientists look at her, they are immediately reminded of Edsger Dijkstra's letter "Go To Statement Considered Harmful" because they don't want to "Go To" her.

    Ok, that last one got me severely beaten up on the playground when I was a kid, but the rest are funny and hardly trollish.

    --
    Karma: Excellent. 15 moderator points expire sometime.
  5. Re:Too right! by houghi · · Score: 5, Funny

    If they shorten the mile enough, they can also change the name to meter.

    --
    Don't fight for your country, if your country does not fight for you.
  6. Attention, people of Illinois by teslar · · Score: 3, Funny

    People of Illinois,

    we have duly noted your recent reconsideration of Pluto and its classification. We appreciate this sign of good-will and will take it into account in our upcoming invasion of Earth.
    Although I can make no promises at this point, I am able to inform you that sparing your lives is currently viewed favourably amongst our population.

    Yours sincerely,
    Gral Rex,
    Minister of Earth Affairs, Government of Pluto

    p.s. to the rest of mankind: You are all still toast.

  7. Re:Politicians wonder... by morgan_greywolf · · Score: 3, Funny

    But -- they did it for the children! We wouldn't want children to become confused with Pluto being listed as a planet in their old, out-of-date text books while the general consensus in the scientific community is that Pluto is a big snowball. Declare legislatively that Pluto is a planet and -- poof -- there you go! No more confused children!

    --
    My blog
  8. If Illinois Says it's a Planet, It's a Planet by RobotRunAmok · · Score: 5, Funny

    Don't argue. There's already three astronomers at the bottom of Lake Michigan who "begged to differ."

    It's the Chicago way.

    1. Re:If Illinois Says it's a Planet, It's a Planet by compro01 · · Score: 4, Funny

      No, it's plutocrats that donate.

      --
      upon the advice of my lawyer, i have no sig at this time
    2. Re:If Illinois Says it's a Planet, It's a Planet by rev_g33k_101 · · Score: 3, Funny

      "I got this Pluto thing and its fucking golden! you just don't give this Pluto thing away!"--- Rod Blagojevich

      --
      "The problem with defending the purity of the English language is that English is about as pure as a cribhouse whore."
  9. Re:There is a good reason for this ... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    There's an easy solution to that, just use 100 year old science texts, Pluto won't be in them at all.

  10. Re:Yo mama is so fat... by Anonymous Coward · · Score: 5, Funny

    You used Edsger Dijkstra references as a kid? I don't think it was the "Yo mama" insults that got you beat up on the playground!

  11. Tomorrow's Headline... by vmxeo · · Score: 5, Funny

    CHICAGO - Federal authorities have indicted several Illinios Senators on corruption charges after an undercover investigation. According to tapes released, Senators called a number of planetoids asking "what they could get" for the title of planet. Rod Blagojevich was unavailable for comment.

    --
    Shameless plug for my photos on Flickr
  12. Re:Too right! by value_added · · Score: 4, Funny

    Yeah. I vote that Illinois also changes the definition of a mile and shortens it so that their residents can get more miles to the gallon! I also vote that they cut the definition of an hour down to 30mins to shorten my working day.

    LOL. Next time it'll be a someone saying a gigabtye is 1,000,000,000 bytes!

  13. The Pluto Proposition by Povno · · Score: 4, Funny

    Pluto: "I'm being what?"

    Astrological society: "Demoted... you're being demoted."

    Pluto: "I don't understand... why?"

    Astrological society: "Honestly, your just not up to code, you know? Most planets have certain criteria they must follow, criteria that you just don't meet. You understand right?"

    Pluto: "I sure as hell do not!"

    Astrological society: "Well, it's like this... realistically... well, your an ice cube, basically and well... we mistook for a real planet. But we do apologize for the confusion."

    Pluto: "OMG. This is so embarrassing."

    Illinois: "It's okay Pluto we understand. Hey... how would like to be governor? Seriously, we have a spot open all the time? Tell you what, if you agree to govern us then we'll let you be a planet."

    Pluto: "Uhm... you do realize that in all reality, I am a giant ice cube right?"

    Illinois: "That is neither her nor there... look, when the time is right... it'll happen. You seem like a smart fellow, and together I think we can get a lot accomplished. Just remember though, when things go bad, you have to go back to being an ice cube. We don't need you parading your mistakes around for the whole galaxy to see like that last guy."

    --
    sudo apt-get lost
  14. Re:Too right! by AGMW · · Score: 3, Funny
    Yes, but the original intent is to say: my penis is a mile long.

    My penis IS a mile long, you insensit-
    ......Sorry, got a bit excited and blacked out there for a while ......
    -ive clod!

    --
    Eclectic beats from Leeds, UK
    handmadehands.co.uk